Intimacy: Today, my boyfriend and I had sex for the first time. He's Latino,...

By Anonymous - 03/12/2014 17:06 - United States - Rancho Santa Margarita

Today, my boyfriend and I had sex for the first time. He's Latino, so I thought he'd like it if I made a bit of noise and called him "papi" while we did it. It freaked him out enough to kill his boner, and now he thinks I have some kind of incest fetish. FML

I agree, your life sucks 23 600

You deserved it 46 410

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Same thing different taste

Sensitive snowflake

By onepussytwopussy - 07/03/2014 19:47 - United Kingdom - Birmingham

Today, my boyfriend and I had sex for the first time, and I tried to be sexy by raking my nails down his back. I guess I did it a little too hard, because he shrieked in pain, leapt off me, and limped around the room cursing and whimpering. Mood ruined. FML

I agree, your life sucks 49 426

You deserved it 26 488

No gods, no masters

By anon - 31/07/2015 20:28 - United States - San Francisco

Today, my boyfriend and I got intimate. It was his first time, which I guess explains him sticking his hand down my panties and practically bitch-slapping my vagina for the next 20 or 30 seconds. I stupidly faked an orgasm just to get him to stop. Now he thinks he's some kind of sex god. FML

I agree, your life sucks 21 368

You deserved it 34 712

By trina - 22/03/2009 09:05 - United States

Today, my boyfriend and I had sex for the first time. I started stroking the back of his neck with both of my hands. He told me, "Your hands are nice and smooth like my grandmother's." FML

I agree, your life sucks 104 407

You deserved it 7 977

Turn off

By Anonymous - 03/11/2012 18:02 - Australia - Wembley

Today, my boyfriend and I got intimate with each other for the first time. He shoved his hand down my pants, touched about an inch away from my clitoris, and whispered, "Cummm" in my ear. I doubt I'll have an orgasm ever again. FML

I agree, your life sucks 41 039

You deserved it 4 252

Noob

By lameows - 04/04/2015 01:57 - United States

Today, things got heated with my boyfriend for the first time. Turns out he's even more inexperienced than I thought; when I started grinding against him, he frowned and said, "Um... why're you doing that? We've still got clothes on..." FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 518

You deserved it 4 402

Nomnom

By wow babe - 19/11/2012 17:46 - United States - Arnold

Today, my boyfriend went down on me for the first time. He definitely killed the mood when, while down there, he started saying, "Nomnomnomnom." FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 093

You deserved it 5 623

Sounds tasty

By FML.. - 06/04/2009 19:51 - China

Today, I was going to have sex with my Hispanic boyfriend. I wanted to turn him on, so I asked my friend how to say, "Fuck me" in Spanish. She claimed it was "Pollo frito". I then had sex, constantly saying "Pollo frito" for an hour. I later realized I was saying "Fried chicken." FML

I agree, your life sucks 66 501

You deserved it 183 688

By S…… - 09/01/2011 10:18 - Singapore

Today, my boyfriend and I had sex. He decided to make gun sound effects as he came. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 391

You deserved it 5 766

First time?

By Anonymous - 29/11/2013 11:56 - United States - Westminster

Today, I had sex with my boyfriend for the first time. It was also the first time he'd ever had sex. How could I tell? He cried all the way through, and called his parents right after. FML

I agree, your life sucks 63 289

You deserved it 6 901

Douche

By YouDontSay - 10/05/2015 15:35 - Ireland - Dublin

Today, I had sex with a guy I've liked for ages. We were lying in his bed afterwards, and he mumbled the word "happy". I thought it was really sweet, until he repeated himself. "My girlfriend probably won't be too happy about this." FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 583

You deserved it 6 917

Katthebamf 29

Thursday 4 December 2014 0:21

Would you appreciate it if he called you mum/mom/momma (whichever) during sex?

tzemmy 25

Thursday 4 December 2014 0:27

why do people like calling their boyfriend "daddy"? doesn't it make you think of your dad?

Comments

liza1922 7

Friday 5 December 2014 18:58

you should have talked about it first

Magnic 6

Friday 5 December 2014 19:18

Well... Incest FTW! :D

SebastianMaier 4

Friday 5 December 2014 23:27

Id love to be called papi :D

WarriorOmen 25

Saturday 6 December 2014 3:26

Calling someone 'daddy' during sex can be really really hot butt it's better to ask first before trying that kinda thing ;)

DJviper_fml 5

Saturday 6 December 2014 7:24

come to Daddy...

kalbrek009 20

Saturday 6 December 2014 14:21

No, just no. YDI for assuming something like that.

SheepShoop_fml 20

Saturday 6 December 2014 22:42

What the hell is wrong with you.

RenegadeXCIX 5

Sunday 7 December 2014 23:05

It's never hot when a girl says anything in Spanish while having sex unless it's a Latina girl

PSYqualiac 17

Monday 8 December 2014 3:39

YDI because you assumed he'd like it based on ethnicity. As harmless as it was... it was wrong to assume he'd be into that. Not everyone likes the same things. Anyways, hasn't FML taught you better than to try stuff like this?

zombiekiller52 24

Wednesday 25 February 2015 4:33

Ok I'm latino and if you say that most of us will be weird out. Just because he latino does not mean he/we like it when you say that. Next time ask him what he likes.