Love: Today, my boyfriend broke up with me because I don't understand...

By Anonymous - 15/02/2012 05:18 - United States

Today, my boyfriend broke up with me because I don't understand the bond between him and his stuffed goose. He's 36. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 796

You deserved it 5 882

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Same thing different taste

By Anonymous - 03/04/2013 13:32 - United Kingdom - London

Today, my girlfriend broke up with me because I dropped our daughter. Our hypothetical daughter. Represented by a stuffed owl. FML

I agree, your life sucks 52 685

You deserved it 6 105

By PunkChik27 - 12/12/2011 04:46 - United States

Today, my boyfriend broke up with me, saying we're too different. His only example? He likes ham and I don't. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 131

You deserved it 4 469

Is this dude a puma?

By Anonymous - 04/04/2020 02:00

Today, my boyfriend broke up with me. Why? Because I became a vegetarian. Apparently, he doesn't believe in "not eating meat." FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 444

You deserved it 1 526

The GOAT

By stunned - 15/03/2010 15:27 - United States

Today, my boyfriend of almost a year and a half broke up with me when he decided he wasn't in love with me anymore. We gave our stuff back, he was joking and happy the whole time until I told him I was taking back my cat. At that point he burst into tears. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 906

You deserved it 3 964

By Anonymous - 15/02/2012 19:26 - United States

Today, my boyfriend broke up with me. He let me know by shaving "CYA" into my dog's fur and then moving out before I got home from work. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 882

You deserved it 2 801

By Anonymous - 05/08/2015 06:13 - United States - Brookfield

Today, my boyfriend broke up with me because he wasn't feeling our two-month relationship was up to par with his parents' 30-year marriage, and, furthermore, I wasn't similar enough to his mother. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 217

You deserved it 2 158

Gamers rise up

By Games - 20/07/2021 01:59

Today, my boyfriend broke up with me. He said it was because his online gaming friends don't like it when I ask him to spend time with me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 217

You deserved it 161

By rotezora - 02/09/2012 12:44 - Switzerland - Basel

Today, my boyfriend broke up with me by rapping in a voicemail. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 556

You deserved it 3 602

By cclllc - 14/08/2012 09:06 - United States - Weatherford

Today, my boyfriend and I broke up. He now argues that he should keep the dog. We only dated for three months, and I've had the dog since I was ten. FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 042

You deserved it 2 096

Grow up

By phreshrice - 07/04/2009 21:41 - United States

Today, my boyfriend broke up with me, because apparently I need to "grow up". He's the one who excessively plays Call of Duty and still has Pokémon and Bionicles in his room. FML

I agree, your life sucks 64 977

You deserved it 22 567

capt_awesome1 11

Wednesday 15 February 2012 11:51

that's a reason to dump someone ?

darwinism 30

Wednesday 15 February 2012 11:55

Sometimes I am sad that evolution seems to skip some people. On the bright side OP, you can now strenghten the bond between you and your vibrator.

Comments

AlmostaChef 4

Wednesday 15 February 2012 13:23

Im siding with him if you made him upset. Ive got a memorabilia that my aunt gave me before she passed. Oh well, I hope you werent harsh.

busylawstudent 0

Wednesday 15 February 2012 13:23

He prolly has daddy issues

bendovver 6

Wednesday 15 February 2012 13:34

Lol, he's a genius or just really stupid to come up with an excuse like that to dump you!

OfficeNinja 5

Wednesday 15 February 2012 13:59

He has probably had a lot of sex with that stuffed goose. That's the bond.

iloveweed69 7

Wednesday 15 February 2012 14:18

id dump someone who's that attach to a stuff animal

oneleggedbeauty 0

Thursday 16 February 2012 3:34

What if it realy meant something to them? Don't judge a book by it's cover.

soupisyummy 13

Wednesday 15 February 2012 14:18

Don't get in between men and their geese. It never ends well..

MizzCandyCotton 13

Wednesday 15 February 2012 14:25

Good riddance -.-

Raeser 7

Wednesday 15 February 2012 14:30

How dare you speak evil 'bout this stuffed goose?

McLovinBearJew 0

Wednesday 15 February 2012 14:36

Yep, sounds like a legitimate reason to me. If anyone tried to get between myself and my ET doll... heads would roll..

russfml 31

Wednesday 15 February 2012 14:48

Sounds like a real keeper, sarcasm to the max lol.. Time for you to find some one with a brain op

Keywords

Food Toxic Family Miscellaneous Gross Love Health Valentine's Day Homeowners Home improvement Kids Awkward Drugs Babysitter Music Lonely Crush Wanker Intimacy Relatable Animals Cats Work Coworkers Transportation Airplanes Embarrassing Sleep Mental health Cute

The Top

Today my job started requiring all transactions regarding cigarettes or alcohol to have the ID scanned before proceeding. There is no way yo bypass this function. I carded a 60 year-old man and his 40 year-old son who both yelled at me for 10 minutes. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 955

You deserved it 186

Today, I was drunk and broke my leg. I called 911, only for the cops to turn up and make me try to walk, with them saying that I was faking my injury. They arrested me for being drunk in public and hours later I finally got to an ER. I had to have surgery on my leg. FML

I agree, your life sucks 469

You deserved it 159

The Top

Today, someone posted photos from a party I was at. On each photo I'm posing in with a girl, my hand is not touching her, but is hovering over her like some creepy weirdo loser. My Facebook nickname is now of course "Hover Hand." FML

I agree, your life sucks 9 158

You deserved it 22 999

Today, my mother brought my sex life in front of an entire family gathering. I lost my virginity at 17 and when she found out she called me a whore. This time, she told the family I'd slept with 100 men by the time I was 18. I’m 40 and my body count is 10. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 676

You deserved it 244

Today, I walked in on my boyfriend of 5 years getting intimate with my best friend. When they saw me they immediately stopped and said nothing. After about 5 seconds of silence my boyfriend yells "April fools!" April Fools was 12 days ago. FML

I agree, your life sucks 138 112

You deserved it 7 972

Today, I tried to show my little cousin how to ride a bike without training wheels. Not only did I crash into a bush, but the handlebars hit me in the nuts, and I ended up rolling around like a Labrador in shit in front of the neighbors. FML

I agree, your life sucks 128

You deserved it 357

Today, I thought it would be fun to make a grand entrance at a party by doing a backflip through the door. I misjudged the height of the door frame, crashed my shins into it, and landed on my face right on a pile of shoes by the door. The host asked if I needed an ambulance. FML

I agree, your life sucks 128

You deserved it 1 337

Today, my parents held a big family dinner at our house. Being the only underage person there, I had to sit there while everyone got progressively drunker and started commenting on how eerily similar I look to Shamu the whale. FML

I agree, your life sucks 47 956

You deserved it 4 766