Animals: Today, my cat head-butted me awake as usual. I reached to pet...

By CatLady - 24/08/2009 13:38 - Canada

Today, my cat head-butted me awake as usual. I reached to pet him, but it wasn't his face I touched. It was the still-twitching corpse of the disemboweled rat he held in his jaws. FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 543

You deserved it 4 164

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Same thing different taste

By animal lover... - 05/10/2013 22:34

Today, I woke up to my cat slowly dragging her paw across my face. I opened my eyes to see a bloody mouse dangling an inch from my face. It was still twitching. FML

I agree, your life sucks 47 891

You deserved it 4 041

By Anonymous - 30/03/2012 07:45 - Australia - Perth

Today, I woke up to what sounded like twigs snapping. Turns out it was the skull of a live mouse being crushed in my cat's jaws. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 263

You deserved it 2 745

Take, is gift

By leaaaa 223 - 14/07/2020 23:01

Today, I woke up to yet another severed rat head next to my bed, which I have to dispose of yet again. Cats are seriously weird. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 303

You deserved it 318

By meowmeow - 21/09/2010 04:38 - Australia

Today, I noticed my kitten was growling and twitching in his sleep. I tried to wake him up by gently prodding him. He responded by waking up and attacking my face. FML

I agree, your life sucks 11 776

You deserved it 31 287

Poor Mickey

By oh, good - 15/09/2019 02:02 - United Kingdom - Bath

Today, my cat was looking a little peaky. After craning my neck to check for lumps under his chin, he felt this was the perfect time to throw up a half-digested mouse onto my face. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 594

You deserved it 261

By Anonymous - 20/07/2019 09:00 - United States - Tulsa

Today, my cat attempted to make up for my insomnia with a dead mouse. I have no idea where he got it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 526

You deserved it 200

Cujo, but for cats

By Anonymous - 25/03/2021 08:01

Today, my cat was incessantly meowing trying to get me to wake up and feed him. Because it was 6 a.m., and I'd hardly slept at all last night, my brain decided that the best solution to get him to shut up would be to hug him. The result was a normally docile and lazy cat giving me a nasty scratch next to my left eye. FML

I agree, your life sucks 582

You deserved it 300

By Anonymous - 12/09/2009 21:19 - United States

Today, I ignored my cat's incessant meowing, and pushed him away every time he wanted to be petted. The next time I walked downstairs I found him dead. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 663

You deserved it 96 605

By crazycatlady - 24/08/2016 09:43 - United States - Ashland

Today, I woke up with my cat's asshole planted firmly on my forehead. FML

I agree, your life sucks 11 187

You deserved it 1 576

Signs of distress

By Anonymous - 29/04/2022 04:00

Today, I was woken up by my cat, who normally doesn't bother me in the morning, meowing desperately and trying to get me to wake up. Fearing that something was very wrong, I jumped out of bed. He gestured for me to follow him, so I did. I followed him all the way to the kitchen, where he proceeded to puke. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 033

You deserved it 212

DameGreyWulf 0

Monday 24 August 2009 20:13

"Wake up, lazy alpha. I've brought you an offering."

redbluegreen 40

Monday 24 August 2009 20:13

Well, where else is he gonna get you a gift? The mall?

Comments

kath91 0

Monday 24 August 2009 20:22

YDI for having a cat, it's what they do.

twirlingqueen4u 0

Tuesday 9 March 2010 4:58

cats rock what does YDI meannnnn

xaer0babiix0 0

Monday 16 January 2012 5:34

Dogs do it too. I can't even begin to count how many times my dog has brought me a dead bird or rabbit.

vita_questa_roba 0

Monday 24 August 2009 20:24

Did you tell him thank you?

something41 0

Monday 24 August 2009 20:25

best alarm clock ever.

jonny2x4 0

Monday 24 August 2009 20:26

cat: "A present for you, princess."

redbluegreen 40

Monday 24 August 2009 20:33

For some reason, I laughed really really hard at this. :D

whoaelena 0

Tuesday 25 August 2009 0:53

Oh man...in Puss In Boots voice too!

thelonelylurker 0

Monday 24 August 2009 20:27

He got you a gift, that's sweet.

Gwenhyvar 3

Tuesday 25 August 2009 6:47

I've "adopted" abandoned cats in the country before and they used to bring "presents" to leave at the front door. It's really a sweet gesture, it shows the cat cares for the OP, at least.

Hambag_ 0

Monday 24 August 2009 20:29

Ahh! This makes my whole body cringe! That's seriously gross! I feel for you

xox_rachy_xox 0

Monday 24 August 2009 20:38

Happy Birthday gorgeous!!!

iFruit 0

Monday 24 August 2009 20:40

The cat's giving you a hint. It wants a gift too... better start catching those rats!

gwenhwyfaer 0

Tuesday 25 August 2009 1:05

In fact, offerings like these seem to be intended as a tutorial. I can only assume that my cats think me quite capable of catching my own, because back when they used to hunt, they never shared. :-/ On the other hand, my boycat tends to wake me up by licking my face. I don't mind unless he sticks his tongue in my eye, which is sadly not as rare as I'd prefer...

thequickredofox 0

Tuesday 25 August 2009 9:02

LOL - I read boycat as boyfriend!

iCharlie_fml 0

Monday 24 August 2009 20:40

Awww the kitty cat gave you a nice lil gift....you shud be proud of it!!! lol Atleast your cat caught something for you...my cats just lays around being lazy!!!