Kids: Today, my daughter was expelled from her school for beating another...

By me - 13/01/2011 20:48 - United States

Today, my daughter was expelled from her school for beating another kindergartener with a Dr. Seuss book. FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 207

You deserved it 7 777

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Same thing different taste

Throwing shade

By deargodwhy - 04/09/2020 10:03

Today, my 12-year-old daughter was suspended from school for doing a book report on 50 Shades of Grey. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 161

You deserved it 797

By Renzy - 12/12/2012 18:32

Today, my son got suspended from school. He's in kindergarten. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 397

You deserved it 7 589

By Kulcha - 13/02/2009 11:07 - Australia

Today, I was expelled from school. By my own mother. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 429

You deserved it 40 460

By Anonymous - 30/05/2012 18:47 - United Kingdom - Barry

Today, I had to sneak out of work to get my daughter from her school. Apparently, she had thought that hurling a bowling ball down the stairs during the lunch hour rush would make her cool. In actual fact, it made her expelled. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 930

You deserved it 3 029

By bully slayer - 12/12/2018 10:00 - Philippines - Pasay City

Today, in the absence of my god-daughter's parents, I went in their place to see her elementary school's principal. She apparently stood up to a known bully's violence and retaliated, sending said bully to the hospital. Not only she may be facing expulsion, I may get sued by the bully's parents. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 998

You deserved it 225

By unknown - 15/09/2011 00:21 - United States

Today, I got a call from my daughter's school saying that she had beat someone up. She's 4. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 180

You deserved it 6 096

Rough school

By strayking - 24/05/2021 17:01

Today, my daughter admitted that she doesn’t have any friends at her elementary school. When I asked her why, she said it was because whenever she talks to any of the other kids, she gets punched in the face. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 186

You deserved it 83

Student becomes the master

By Anonymous - 06/06/2021 09:58 - United States - Steele

Today, my son's "favorite" teacher went on a tirade criticizing my "awful" parenting. About two months ago, my son got her fired after he reported her to the principal for forcing him to miss out on lunch to finish a project. Apparently, that wasn't the first time she did something like that. FML

I agree, your life sucks 970

You deserved it 116

Whack-a-Mole

By Anonymous - 28/09/2019 02:01

Today, I had to pick my daughter up from pre-school because she repeatedly hit another kid with a stick. Apparently, my parents have been letting her watch violent action movies again. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 506

You deserved it 293

Evil will always win

By emily ann - 21/05/2023 00:01

Today, I was suspended from school for “being involved in a fight.” The other girl beat me up while I didn't do anything to defend myself, for fear of getting in trouble. She got off scot free. FML

I agree, your life sucks 959

You deserved it 132

Domo_Arigato7 3

Thursday 13 January 2011 23:07

I love your kid, lol.

Sockmonkey_Ninja 0

Thursday 13 January 2011 23:02

haha gangster daughter. as long as she isn't mugging other kids of their milk cartons she'll prolly grow out of her violent stage.

Comments

lexiemae97 9

Friday 14 January 2011 7:04

haha that's hilarious! sounds like me when I was little....

scuba113 2

Friday 14 January 2011 7:05

Dam I thought I was a bad kid in kindergarten or just the school policy now and days just suck.

DoctorDictator 0

Friday 14 January 2011 7:15

So what i thought IS right... DR.SUESS DOES HURT PEOPLE!!

Donkeydick360 0

Friday 14 January 2011 7:35

at least she didnt kill anyone

cope75 0

Friday 14 January 2011 7:51

straight up bad ass

ceepevoy 0

Friday 14 January 2011 8:03

BITCH, I said finish ur green eggs and ham! or else im telling the doctor0

esebenz 0

Friday 14 January 2011 8:13

haha I do not like them Sam I am I do not litlle girls named Pam

Ranimal 12

Friday 14 January 2011 8:21

Definitely a little badass in the making!

CMacGie 0

Friday 14 January 2011 9:04

Lmao! Well When I Was in Kinder I got In Trouble For Choking My Friend (:

PrincessRavishin 0

Friday 14 January 2011 13:07

did he forget the safe word?

killadict11 0

Friday 14 January 2011 9:10

Dr. Suess awesome , Epic

Keywords

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The Top

Today, I followed my daughter and found out she wasn’t with friends, she was on a date. I confronted her about the lie, but she takes after her mother, a lawyer, and steamrollered over me about invading her privacy, so even though she lied, she somehow has the moral high ground. FML

I agree, your life sucks 567

You deserved it 2 713

Today, my wife dragged me to the bathroom, promising to "show something hot." Not that I was in the mood, but okay. She took off her pants, sat on a toilet, and demanded that I tell her about my day. She wanted me to entertain her while she was taking a dump. FML

I agree, your life sucks 486

You deserved it 82

The Top

Today, while on holiday in Melbourne, I begged my wife to take a day off from yelling angrily at our 4 year-old. A few hours later, she was cursing and yelling in front of gathering onlookers because he didn't want to go inside LegoLand. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 057

You deserved it 176

Today, I was called to be told I'm fired for not showing up for my shift. I guess she didn't check her voice message to see that I gave birth last night. FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 240

You deserved it 783

Today, my 12 year-old dog died. My boyfriend's attempts to comfort me involved him muttering, "At least she knows how to play dead now." FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 156

You deserved it 2 391

Today, I was woken up by my teenage son pulling down my shirt and taking pictures of my breasts. FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 982

You deserved it 3 354

Today, I tried talking to the very quiet girl in my grade. We were having a conversation when a very hot guy walked into the cafeteria. I said to the girl, "The things I would do for him…" She looked at me dead in the eye and said, "That's my boyfriend." FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 743

You deserved it 4 735

Today, my neighbor, whom I've had a massive crush on but barely know, actually started flirting with me. Long story short, it ended with him getting a blowjob. I said, "We should make this a thing." He replied, "Yeah, a one-time thing." FML

I agree, your life sucks 4 606

You deserved it 6 593