Love: Today, my girlfriend dumped me because I didn't take her pet...

By steve - 05/09/2012 08:14 - Australia - Melbourne

Today, my girlfriend dumped me because I didn't take her pet rock seriously. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 062

You deserved it 5 345

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Same thing different taste

By Afroman720 - 27/07/2015 18:55 - United States

Today, my girlfriend dumped me because her dog "told her to". FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 771

You deserved it 2 890

Know your worth

By Anonymous - 20/05/2021 04:01

Today, my girlfriend broke up with me, because I was apparently "too good" for her. FML

I agree, your life sucks 939

You deserved it 98

By really? - 23/09/2013 02:24 - United States

Today, I texted my girlfriend to tell her that we couldn't hang out because my dog died this morning and we were burying him. She replied that she wasn't going to get stood up by a stupid dog. She then broke up with me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 53 077

You deserved it 4 407

By Anonymous - 01/11/2009 17:43 - United States

Today, my girlfriend broke up with me because her mom said she would buy her a pug if she did. I got dumped for a dog, and an ugly one for that matter. FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 667

You deserved it 6 984

By Micheal - 23/11/2009 03:59 - Canada

Today, my girlfriend broke up me with for being the "perfect boyfriend". Apparently I'm the best boyfriend she's ever had, and she didn't know how to take it. So she dumped me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 48 266

You deserved it 3 772

By athlete47 - 03/08/2019 14:00

Today, my girlfriend dumped me because I was "changing too much." My big change was a haircut. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 667

You deserved it 145

By Brad - 08/03/2009 05:33 - Canada

Today, my girlfriend dumped me for someone else. An hour earlier I had just gotten permission from her dad to propose. FML

I agree, your life sucks 157 368

You deserved it 7 533

Check yourself before you wreck yourself

By Anonymous - 12/04/2021 02:00

Today, I dumped my girlfriend because she frequently wouldn't answer my texts or phone calls, and not call or message back for days. I felt that bringing it up made me a control freak. I couldn't take it anymore. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 258

You deserved it 331

By Anonymous - 28/02/2011 03:23

Today, my girlfriend broke up with me for not letting her keep the 75 cents that she stole from my truck. FML

I agree, your life sucks 23 218

You deserved it 50 954

By NowImSingle - 12/02/2018 19:00

Today, my girlfriend broke up with me and threw all my stuff out into the yard because she caught me "texting another woman". Guess it didn't matter to her that the contact name was "Mom". FML

I agree, your life sucks 5 504

You deserved it 416

zkcupcake 4

Wednesday 5 September 2012 16:15

That's a rocky way to end a relationship

Welshite 39

Wednesday 5 September 2012 16:14

Hey, rocks make the perfect pets!

Comments

18ieronimo 4

Wednesday 5 September 2012 21:09

Try dating older girls preferably ones over 10

DrainedOfSanity 4

Wednesday 5 September 2012 22:04

How does one take a rock "seriously"?

Pandasaurus 14

Wednesday 5 September 2012 22:51

Sadly this may not be as dumb as a person can get...

Austyn57 1

Wednesday 5 September 2012 23:43

you sure knw how to pick umm

softpaws 17

Thursday 6 September 2012 0:36

Shouldve taken it serious...

elvisaaron 3

Thursday 6 September 2012 0:57

Sounds like your better off buddy!

blanccamaro74 6

Thursday 6 September 2012 1:38

Oh preschool romances

hurrican_fml 0

Thursday 6 September 2012 2:40

Not an fml dude, your better off now.

mosquito19 14

Thursday 6 September 2012 2:57

you should draw a Smiley face on her rock with your poo.

sarahblayke 10

Thursday 6 September 2012 3:04

Wat a excuse lol

Keywords

Cute Love Surprise Texting My ex Awkward Wanker Intimacy Sex Sleep Health Insomnia Mental health Cooking Food Kids Weekend Parents Miscellaneous Annoying Pranks Embarrassing Work Technology Coworkers Zoom Roommate Argument Cats Animals

The Top

Today, I am babysitting my niece for the first time. After getting her to go to sleep, I felt a sudden urge to sneeze. My sneezes are loud as hell. Attempts to dampen the sound were unsuccessful. My colossal sneeze scared the bejesus out of her, waking her up again, and now she's afraid of me. What do I do now? FML

I agree, your life sucks 291

You deserved it 121

Today, I had a job interview for the perfect job. My phone rang in my pocket. I’d forgotten to silence it. The worst part? The ringtone was a guy saying “Pussy!” on a continuous loop. The interviewer chewed me out for being “unprofessional” and kicked me out. I have no idea who set that ringtone. FML

I agree, your life sucks 330

You deserved it 1 166

The Top

Today, I realized I'm trapped. I might be heading into an abusive relationship that I won't be able to escape, but I can't leave because then I'd break his heart and I love him too much for that. FML

I agree, your life sucks 144

You deserved it 1 031

Today, I'm 8 months pregnant with a horribly sore back and an insensitive husband. I'm so desperate for relief that I'm lying on the couch, using my vibrator to give myself a back massage. FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 230

You deserved it 4 727

Today, I was sick from both ends at work. My boss wouldn't let me go home, and told me to borrow a pair of spare pants to change into. I suffered another bout of gastroenteritis and shit someone else's pants. FML

I agree, your life sucks 4 868

You deserved it 297

Today, I accidentally said the wrong name during sex. That name just happened to be "Sarah", which is both my ex-girlfriend's name and my wife's sister's name. When she asked me which one I meant, I panicked and said, "Both." FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 140

You deserved it 60 679

Today, I actually used Febreze as a substitute for deodorant. FML

I agree, your life sucks 9 618

You deserved it 27 969

Today, at the funeral home where I work, I asked my boss if it was time to "bring out the stiff". I didn't realize the guy's family was not only in the building, but within earshot as well. FML

I agree, your life sucks 6 842

You deserved it 20 391

Same thing different taste

Know your worth

Check yourself before you wreck yourself

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