Intimacy: Today, my girlfriend thought it would be sexy to stick her finger...

By Anon. - 01/03/2011 23:51 - United States

Today, my girlfriend thought it would be sexy to stick her finger up my ass during sex. I screamed like a little girl and barely managed to finish. Afterward, she said, 'Now you know how it feels.' FML

I agree, your life sucks 20 616

You deserved it 91 026

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Same thing different taste

Finger wagging

By Anonymous - 16/12/2024 14:00 - United States - Edison

Today, my normally-prudish girlfriend grabbed my crotch and said, "I want you to fuck me like I've never been fucked." I obliged. She loved it, until after we'd finished, when she decided that she felt "cheap, gross, and used" and started a huge fight. FML

I agree, your life sucks 362

You deserved it 95

Are you experienced?

By Brax - 30/05/2012 09:46 - United States

Today, my girlfriend stuck her finger up my butt while giving me a hand-job, promising it would feel really good. It just felt awkward and made me need to poop. FML

I agree, your life sucks 41 257

You deserved it 9 422

Girl boss

By dating walter white's gf apparently - 06/04/2013 19:13 - United Kingdom

Today, while going down on my girlfriend, I finally managed to give her an orgasm. During that orgasm, she tore out a clump of my hair, causing me to scream in pain. She scowled and said, "Ah shut it, ya little bitch." FML

I agree, your life sucks 59 130

You deserved it 13 422

Submission

By Anonymous - 24/11/2019 18:00 - Canada

Today, my girlfriend and I were having sex. I thought I'd be spontaneous and spice things up, and gave her a spank across the butt. She started crying. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 516

You deserved it 1 909

What what?

By Anonymous - 12/04/2022 16:00

Today, my boyfriend stuck his finger in my butt and I liked it, but I can’t ever tell him that or he’ll get that smug look on his face like, “I told you so, let’s have anal now.” FML

I agree, your life sucks 503

You deserved it 1 457

Sensitive snowflake

By onepussytwopussy - 07/03/2014 19:47 - United Kingdom - Birmingham

Today, my boyfriend and I had sex for the first time, and I tried to be sexy by raking my nails down his back. I guess I did it a little too hard, because he shrieked in pain, leapt off me, and limped around the room cursing and whimpering. Mood ruined. FML

I agree, your life sucks 49 430

You deserved it 26 499

Really heavy sleeper

By Anonymous - 17/12/2021 01:01 - United Kingdom

Today, my girlfriend revealed that last night she decided to 'test how asleep I was' by putting her finger up my nose as far as she could. Then in my mouth. Then in my ear. Then back in my mouth. I slept through the whole thing. FML

I agree, your life sucks 901

You deserved it 144

By Anonymous - 19/06/2012 03:33 - United States

Today, I was getting dirty with my boyfriend. It was the first time he had fingered anyone, and the only thing he said was, "It feels like the inside of my asshole." FML

I agree, your life sucks 49 428

You deserved it 4 626

No good

By :(( - 28/09/2013 21:24 - Australia - Brisbane

Today, I was all set to lose my virginity to my girlfriend. I was ecstatic, until she threatened to "beat the fuck" out of me if I didn't make it good for her. The actual sex was 30 seconds of me being given death glares, causing me to lose my boner, and have to leave in shame. FML

I agree, your life sucks 69 446

You deserved it 8 034

By Anonymous - 24/04/2013 18:56 - United States - Huntington Park

Today, I was making out with my girlfriend for the first time, and she reached down to feel me up. When her hands got there, she stopped and said, "You're not even hard..." I was. FML

I agree, your life sucks 82 469

You deserved it 9 863

diesel42o 0

Wednesday 2 March 2011 8:03

she owned u on that one

sam_stalker 0

Wednesday 2 March 2011 8:04

op she didn't think it was sexy, she did it for revenge >=~}

Comments

Villagomez15 0

Wednesday 2 March 2011 18:35

haha sure does suck!

emodude44 0

Wednesday 2 March 2011 18:41

And now you can say you've done anal with your girlfriend! just leave out the fact that you were the one getting it

Calyx_fml 21

Wednesday 2 March 2011 18:47

My woman loves a thumb in her ass. She practically puts it in there herself.

megzzy 0

Wednesday 2 March 2011 18:49

karma's a bitch :D

fanuvlb 0

Wednesday 2 March 2011 19:05

it ain't that bad.

perdix 29

Wednesday 2 March 2011 19:55

That's why they call it The Shocker. Two in the pink, one in the stink (except you don't have a pink.)

Yung23 0

Wednesday 2 March 2011 20:24

lmfao

selena_1227 0

Wednesday 2 March 2011 20:58

Lol I shouldn't laugh but that is kinda funny. Sucks though.

GutsNNoses 0

Wednesday 2 March 2011 20:59

your dick is the same size as her finger? I think that's an FML in itself. FYL

theforcethatdriv 0

Wednesday 2 March 2011 21:02

she owned u on that one but hey at least u know how to do thingd next time u and ya wife explore

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I agree, your life sucks 14 374

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I agree, your life sucks 852

You deserved it 90

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I agree, your life sucks 44 559

You deserved it 3 853

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I agree, your life sucks 412

You deserved it 63

Same thing different taste

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