Intimacy: Today, my husband decided it would be funny to shout "Woohoo!"...

By anonymous - 03/02/2011 05:17

Today, my husband decided it would be funny to shout "Woohoo!" in Michael Jackson's voice while having an orgasm. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 286

You deserved it 6 454

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Same thing different taste

By mrssagdiyev - 05/03/2011 14:19 - United States

Today, my husband decided to imitate Borat and shout "Very Nice! I Excite!" while having sex. He's also decided that it was ingenious and does it every single time, the entire time. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 625

You deserved it 5 444

By fmlalways - 22/01/2011 13:00 - United Kingdom

Today, whilst having sex, my husband screamed out a man's name. FML

I agree, your life sucks 56 780

You deserved it 5 152

Honky

By Anonymous - This FML is from back in 2015 but it's good stuff - United States

Today, while my boyfriend and I were getting intimate, I let out a moan that can only really be described as sounding like a clown car horn. He ended up laughing so hard that he couldn't continue. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 345

You deserved it 5 181

By anonymous - 19/02/2011 13:12 - United States

Today, I was having the best sex with my husband, and right when I reached climax, he shouted "Abracadabra!" FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 064

You deserved it 7 397

Revealing

By kitkat545 - 15/06/2009 23:18 - United States

Today, my husband called me from work just to chat. He asked what I had been up to today. I was feeling frisky so I told him all about how I had gotten horny, watched a porno and masturbated earlier. It wasn't until I heard the hoots and laughter that I realized he had me on speakerphone. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 079

You deserved it 51 000

Big kid

By Anonymous - 08/09/2012 14:20 - United States - Rhodes

Today, I told my husband that I'm tired of feeling like his "blow-up doll". His response was to honk my boob and make squeaking noises. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 386

You deserved it 5 717

By Anonymous - 13/10/2012 21:54 - Australia - Brisbane

Today, my husband decided that he simply couldn't exist any longer without giving me his own version of a wet-willy. He creeped up on me as I was sleeping and wiggled his wet penis around in my ear. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 145

You deserved it 4 215

Grammy award winner

By blow away - 28/07/2014 04:36 - United States - Middletown

Today, my husband played a recording of me breaking wind in my sleep to my whole family at the dinner table. To make matters worse, it was a compilation of different noises from over a long period of time. My family was horrified and my husband seemed proud of himself. FML

I agree, your life sucks 43 361

You deserved it 4 573

No gods no masters

By Anonymous - 01/03/2024 09:00 - United States - North Royalton

Today, during a intense orgasm I screamed, "You're my God!" at my husband. Afterwards, he told me I was blasphemous and reminded me that God smites those with false prophets. Needless to say, I think I'll just keep my mouth shut in the future. FML

I agree, your life sucks 519

You deserved it 172

By Kate - 07/06/2011 07:50 - United States

Today, I was reading a crappy "How to spice up your marriage" book with my husband for laughs. One of the ideas was for the guy to whip his knob out, stand behind his girl and say "Can you say that into the microphone?" Now he does it every chance he gets, and I fall for it EVERY TIME. FML

I agree, your life sucks 14 660

You deserved it 44 199

jewban 3

Thursday 3 February 2011 12:19

jamonaaaaa!!!!! HEeHEe

SirSantpoort 0

Thursday 3 February 2011 12:20

Its your husband.. Who cares if he makes a joke like that.. As long as he doesnt do it all the time :)

Comments

Christopher08 0

Saturday 5 February 2011 16:51

that's isn't funny at all....... that ***** hilarious

kaleighhhjj 0

Saturday 5 February 2011 23:24

lol

allyshopeful 0

Sunday 6 February 2011 1:56

Sorry to say, but as soon as I read this, I laughed so hard. That's hilarious! MJ lives on

rocket123 0

Wednesday 9 February 2011 22:07

ctfu thats hilarious.!!!!

kemar7856 0

Thursday 17 February 2011 3:30

FOOOL! Michael jackson does'nt say woohoo its whhoooh

SarahStarzz 0

Wednesday 23 February 2011 1:59

ur husband is a keeper!!! u should love him no matter wt -.- I dnk why ppl r whining bout their bf/gf etc ..... I dnt see a FML in here :/

NadiG7 2

Monday 28 February 2011 16:55

LMBOOOOO MICHAEL JACKSON IZ A LEGEND... THATZ AWESUM ATLEAST HE DIDNT MOONWALK ALL OVER UR ****** :)

suckmysarcasm 10

Monday 7 March 2011 5:16

u shouldnt be upset, at least you know your his "thriller" ; )

cokyspaniel 0

Thursday 14 April 2011 16:17

that is ******* adorable why is that such an FML???

cokyspaniel 0

Sunday 1 May 2011 3:45

that is so cute...... don't deny it

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I agree, your life sucks 750

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I agree, your life sucks 1 302

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I agree, your life sucks 3 077

You deserved it 570

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I agree, your life sucks 32 550

You deserved it 5 629

Today, my husband let me know he felt I was ignoring him by jabbing me in the right ear with his erect penis while I was Skyping with my mum overseas. FML

I agree, your life sucks 40 332

You deserved it 6 185