Intimacy: Today, my husband said that when we have sex he almost gets...

By Hannah - 21/12/2010 17:01 - United States

Today, my husband said that when we have sex he almost gets as excited as he does when he gets a chopper gunner on Black Ops. FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 061

You deserved it 7 909

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Same thing different taste

Heated gaming moment

By Anonymous - 26/11/2014 19:41 - United States - Los Angeles

Today, I agreed to give my husband head while he played Call of Duty. I was happy because he enjoyed it at first, until he started getting his ass kicked in the game. He lost and angrily blamed me for distracting him. FML

I agree, your life sucks 42 140

You deserved it 6 808

Headshot!

By Amb - 01/06/2010 23:56 - United States

Today, I realized my boyfriend makes the same noises in bed as he does when he's winning in Call of Duty. FML

I agree, your life sucks 40 072

You deserved it 6 199

By Noname - 16/02/2009 00:33 - United States

Today, I was giving my boyfriend a blow job, he was twitching and moving around and saying "oh yeah" then he said "take that bitch". I looked up to see he was only excited about how he is domination in Call of Duty 4. FML

I agree, your life sucks 49 045

You deserved it 10 600

By Anonymous - 22/11/2014 18:18 - Ireland - Kilkenny

Today, I was having some rare good sex with my husband, when he suddenly said, "I'm fuckin' BORED," and pulled out so he could go play his video games. FML

I agree, your life sucks 46 181

You deserved it 5 620

By S…… - 09/01/2011 10:18 - Singapore

Today, my boyfriend and I had sex. He decided to make gun sound effects as he came. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 389

You deserved it 5 766

By Anonymous - 25/08/2015 19:54 - United States - Phoenix

Today, my husband told me that he is done having sex because it eats up his online gaming time. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 006

You deserved it 3 538

By Dejected - 07/12/2009 19:16 - United States

Today, I finally got a hold of my husband, who I haven't actually talked to in two and a half weeks, since he's deployed and it's hard to chat. He told me he couldn't talk because he was in an epic battle. In Call of Duty. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 189

You deserved it 4 729

Pragmatic

By Anonymous - 15/03/2010 14:05 - South Africa

Today, after confronting my husband about lack of intimacy in our marriage, I found him playing with himself. His response to my shock was, "This is less work and less involving." FML

I agree, your life sucks 24 966

You deserved it 4 955

By Anonymous - 21/03/2009 07:18 - Canada

Today, I was playing Xbox live with my boyfriend. I was bored so I decided to mess around. So I put down my remote and unbuttoned his pants. Two minutes in he said, "Hurry up, we're getting killed without you. Besides you're way better at video games." FML

I agree, your life sucks 77 359

You deserved it 13 299

Concentration face

By Nuttree - 01/08/2010 07:02 - United States

Today, I noticed my husband chews his tongue while we are having sex. He also does this while he is playing World of Warcraft. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 439

You deserved it 6 885

mrbiffle 0

Tuesday 21 December 2010 22:38

hahaha I told my girl the same thing

cusof 0

Tuesday 21 December 2010 23:30

This is your girl

Comments

alexiiiiis09 0

Tuesday 21 December 2010 23:03

next time say you'll chop his gunner.

bennyboy111 7

Wednesday 22 December 2010 13:51

win

Iowa123 0

Tuesday 21 December 2010 23:13

'Almost'...?

Doortje 29

Tuesday 21 December 2010 23:17

Congratulations, you've managed to find the keyword in this FML.

unidentified_sta 5

Tuesday 21 December 2010 23:27

AUDIENCE PLEASE: APPLAUD

quaddrummer93 0

Tuesday 21 December 2010 23:42

Doortje ftw

vballerlover07 0

Wednesday 22 December 2010 13:53

I actually did laugh out loud when I read this...

SupxD 0

Tuesday 21 December 2010 23:15

haha I did the same.!!!

ninja3sp 0

Tuesday 21 December 2010 23:25

haha

avirus 0

Tuesday 21 December 2010 23:26

im sorry for you :(

thepyro395 0

Tuesday 21 December 2010 23:30

that sucks

Kahuna382000 2

Tuesday 21 December 2010 23:31

It is pretty awesome.

averagepurson 2

Tuesday 21 December 2010 23:36

dang that must be some good sex

Flamehog9 0

Tuesday 21 December 2010 23:36

Send.

50epidemic 0

Tuesday 21 December 2010 23:38

that is a compliment... take it and go... it is ****** EXCITING to get a chopper gunner!!

Zeusthegoose 0

Wednesday 22 December 2010 0:05

yes thank you someone that understands

Keywords

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The Top

Today, I got dressed, did my hair, carefully applied my makeup, sprayed myself with perfume, grabbed my bag and put on my coat. I got to the door, and then realised that I had nowhere to go, nothing to do and none of my friends were answering my calls. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 486

You deserved it 537

Stop everything you're doing right now, there's an (almost) naked lady in today's illustration! Plus, there's a puppet AND doctors. It's the perfect illustration, made by Gemma Correll, our British artist of the day. Check out her interview! ...

I agree, your life sucks 10

You deserved it 9

The Top

Today, I asked my wife who she would choose, me or the dog. She chose the dog. No hesitation. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 329

You deserved it 995

Today, I found out my boyfriend sleeps on a Princess Leia pillow. He's 22. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 751

You deserved it 9 151

Today, at work, I used my foot to flush the toilet, lost my balance, and ended up catching myself with my foot in the toilet. FML

I agree, your life sucks 20 380

You deserved it 11 013

Today, I was walking down the street, when a man behind me tapped me on the shoulder. He gave a $5 bill and said that he thought I had dropped it. Not having the integrity to turn him down, I took it. I spent the next 20 minutes being chased by a crazy hobo who claimed that it was his. FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 437

You deserved it 52 215

Today, I had to explain to my girlfriend why being with a girl while being with me is cheating. FML

I agree, your life sucks 43 184

You deserved it 7 823

Today, I slipped on the wet floor at work and sprained my wrist badly. I was carrying the wet floor sign so no one would slip. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 535

You deserved it 7 168