Kids: Today, my mom visited my new apartment for the first time. I...

By thanks mom ¬_¬ - 24/08/2013 22:05 - United States - Carlsbad

Today, my mom visited my new apartment for the first time. I was showing her the bedroom, when she looked into my opened sock drawer and said, "Using Durex, eh? Yeah, you were born 'cause a Trojan split." FML

I agree, your life sucks 45 708

You deserved it 4 741

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Historical anecdotes with a light touch to commemorate with a respectful smile. More…

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Same thing different taste

By tracy4191 - 18/09/2016 05:21 - United States - Ponchatoula

Today, I found out my mom sleeps in my room when I'm at college during the week. I discovered this my bumping into her dildo with my foot. FML

I agree, your life sucks 12 556

You deserved it 737

Locks are useful

By mjayne17 - 21/03/2009 19:04 - Canada

Today, I was over at my boyfriend's house. One thing led to another and we were just getting to the good parts when his mom walked in. After a long, awkward pause, she said, "I like your socks" and walked out. She's a teacher at my high school. I have to see her every day. FML

I agree, your life sucks 52 023

You deserved it 22 282

By bob - 05/02/2011 12:02 - United States

Today, I saw my mom run across the house naked for a condom. FML

I agree, your life sucks 57 146

You deserved it 4 218

This is fine

By TheywearintheDIRTYlaundrybasket! - 26/03/2019 22:00

Today, I walked into the house I share with my boyfriend and found his mum sashaying up and down the hall. When she saw me, she exclaimed, "Oh, you've got to tell me where you get your underwear from!" Yep, she was wearing my panties. Neither she nor her son could see why I would be upset by that. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 563

You deserved it 223

By Noname - 06/02/2009 19:23 - United States

Today, my mom decided to tell me about her new boyfriend. I know him. I've slept with him. FML

I agree, your life sucks 84 632

You deserved it 18 550

Why would you do that?

By HughGorgy - 20/03/2009 05:37 - Canada

Today, after sex with my girlfriend, I thought it would be sexy to wear her underwear until we saw each other again. I found a pair in her bathroom, but they definitely weren't her sexy ones. Her mom walked in on me to collect the laundry and screeched, "What are you doing with my panties!" FML

I agree, your life sucks 17 386

You deserved it 103 229

By wnrz - 18/02/2012 20:26 - United States

Today, I walked in on my mom changing. She was trying on a thong my boyfriend bought me for Valentine's Day. It looks better on her. FML

I agree, your life sucks 49 838

You deserved it 4 835

By GetHardOrGoHome - 31/03/2012 04:22 - United States - Chardon

Today, I visited my gynecologist. As she had her fingers inside me she decided that was the perfect time to say, "I absolutely love your socks!" FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 585

You deserved it 3 500

Mom won this one

By duuuuude - 17/04/2009 03:08 - United States

Today, I was home alone while my mom went out to dinner. I decided to hop in the shower, and I noticed my mom left her douche in there. After, I texted her telling her what I found and that it was gross. Her response? "It's not gross. It came from my vagina, like you and your sister." FML

I agree, your life sucks 50 993

You deserved it 23 324

Not now, guys

By Sonofa - 17/05/2013 15:52 - Canada - Cold Lake

Today, I brought my girlfriend home for the first time to meet my parents. They were having a heated argument because my mom had bought "the wrong toilet paper" and my dad was angry because "she should know that he has a sensitive anus." FML

I agree, your life sucks 53 241

You deserved it 3 808

Nyx_fml 23

Sunday 25 August 2013 3:05

There's nothing like condom talk with your mother.

tanekdrachonae 19

Sunday 25 August 2013 3:12

It's ok, I was an accident too. We should be friends.

Comments

thatnucca 36

Sunday 25 August 2013 4:23

Let's just say you were the fastest out of the lot that escaped OP...

Fernando83 19

Sunday 25 August 2013 4:24

You should freak her out and tell her "I'm not sure Durex are any better, I think one of the girls might be pregnant."

Obey_StudBoii 23

Sunday 25 August 2013 4:41

lol your mom is awesome

slappygecko 21

Sunday 25 August 2013 4:55

To all those who use our competitors' products, Happy Father's Day.

sweetbliss3 37

Sunday 25 August 2013 5:11

i don't think she was being ignorant or rude about it. she's probably just glad you're not using a condom brand that has failed her, especially if you're not ready yet for kids.