By Litterbox - 20/04/2009 02:09 - United States

Today, my mother called me downstairs to give me what I assumed was going to be "The Talk" (About four years too late). So she sits me down, holds my hands, and with the gentlest, most motherly expression on her face tells me, "Honey, if you ever come home pregnant, I'll kill you and the baby." FML
I agree, your life sucks 147 260
You deserved it 17 288

Litterbox tells us more.

Litterbox 0

Wow O_o I can't believe how much of a response this thing is getting(first post ever...) But for clarification:(Skip if you want...Blah) a) Since my mother was willing to beat me with a metal end of a broom for claiming Hitler and the events of the holocaust were wrong and has a machete at the ready underneath her bed, the threat was/is to be taken seriously, wouldn't you think... (Is she still hilarious?) b) Kill me, sure, but THE KID??? c)I would've loved for my mother to have been concerned/open enough with me to have an actual conversation about sex... Blegh -_-

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Top comments

Juli_fml 0

anyone else think there should be a "parents" section on here?

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Comments

crazy_legs_mcgee 0

But if all the poor people get abortions, what are we going to eat?

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scottie06 0

#21, Being born into your grandmother, aunt, father situation is not the same as being born into a situation where you aren't supported. Next, #7 didn't state the OP was living in poverty, only said what #7 would tell their own kids. Last, I might disagree with their views, but it's pathetic to insult their knowledge when all they did was state their opinion. #31 , Apparently your parents should have been the ones that got an abortion since you insulted #12 and wrote a post about how they were adopted without reading #12's post saying "I'm not adopted..." You didn't even realize it was the same person as #7 until later even though you included it in your post. #32 , Don't bother jumping on the bandwagon without a better response then 'go away.'

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Fuck_this_day 0

Well if she reacts like that if you're being pregnant... Don't touch her iPod O.O

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Chadling 0

onigiriqueen (author of #7, 12, 24, 26, 41), I say this with as much respect as I possibly can. One of my best friends from high school and my sister in law are adopted. They're great people--the former happily admitted that he was a "love child" and regularly referred to himself as an "adopted b******", and the latter is just one of the nicest people I've had the pleasure of meeting. It's not surprising that my brother fell in love with her--she teaches elementary children, for crying out loud. If you mean to imply that being smothered in the womb is a better fate than the wonderful lives that they're living right now, I... no, I'm not going to say the words that I so badly want to say.

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dethdethdeth 0

I'm just laughing so hard at everyone telling everyone that they should have been aborted.

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AntiChrist7 0

it seems your mother doesn't like children

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jonnymohio 2

I love your mother. That's exactly the same advice I would give. In fact, I think I'll steal that line and use it some day.

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glass_doll83 0

my mother said the same thing to me! :)

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rukusrazor 0

She's my kind of lady. I like her. FYL for not being as cool as your mom.

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