Kids: Today, my turtle, who had a little portion of the garden all...

By Grindyloo - 05/05/2012 10:06

Today, my turtle, who had a little portion of the garden all to herself, died. My 5-year-old nephew wanted to "be like Mario" by jumping on her. FML

I agree, your life sucks 42 414

You deserved it 2 848

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Historical anecdotes with a light touch to commemorate with a respectful smile. More…

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Same thing different taste

By dukebluedevils13 - 05/08/2011 01:47 - United States

Today, my 5 year old fish died. As I was flushing him, he started swimming again. FML

I agree, your life sucks 45 264

You deserved it 8 146

By Nikki - 03/08/2009 13:26 - United States

Today, I was babysitting my little cousin when we decided to go outside and have a "treasure hunt" in the backyard. The first thing we found? The bones of her pet dog who had passed away four years ago. FML

I agree, your life sucks 42 281

You deserved it 5 700

RIP little guy

By Anonymous - 10/12/2014 19:58 - United States - Murfreesboro

Today, my pet bunny died. My little sister is distraught and practically suicidal, because apparently she playfully pointed a wand at it a few days ago and said, "Avada kedavra!" She's absolutely convinced that she killed it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 743

You deserved it 3 125

By RestlessDiesel - 18/04/2016 14:40 - United States - Hudson

Today, I pulled off the road to help a turtle cross it. Before I could get out of my car a dump truck ran over the turtle, splattering my car with turtle guts and bits of shell. FML

I agree, your life sucks 24 078

You deserved it 1 838

By deadfish - 03/10/2009 16:28 - United States

Today, my 9 year-old little sister is coming back to town with the rest of my family. She specifically asked me to feed her fish. I totally forgot until she called me 10 minutes ago to tell me she was on her way home and couldn't wait to see her fishie. He's dead. FML

I agree, your life sucks 8 352

You deserved it 61 675

By Anonymous - 15/06/2009 17:17 - United States

Today, my girlfriend dumped me and left me with the responsibility of the turtle that I never wanted but she insisted we buy "together." A little bit of research has revealed that Andre will live for "at least 30 years." FML

I agree, your life sucks 49 673

You deserved it 7 332

By GlueAndCarrots - 20/08/2015 02:38 - Canada - Markham

Today, I told my daughter that we're going to the beach. Today, my daughter also tried to dig up our deceased dog that we buried in our back yard last week so it can come along. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 141

You deserved it 1 806

By Anonymous - 11/08/2013 00:04 - United States - Reno

Today, after swimming in the pool, I went into the shower. Little did I know that my niece was hiding in there. She excitedly yelled "I saw your boobs!" Now my nephew won't stop crying because he didn't get to see them as well. FML

I agree, your life sucks 55 392

You deserved it 4 397

By Lifes_a_bust - 08/08/2010 16:22 - United States

Today, my cat died. But, before he could bite the dust, he left a goodbye present on my bed: a decapitated baby rabbit. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 964

You deserved it 4 448

By Kate - 05/04/2019 22:00 - United States - Exton

Today, my dog showed me her latest kill. Too bad it was the stuffed animals my dead grandmother had given me as a child that had a lot of sentimental value to me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 188

You deserved it 419

gigi96 2

Saturday 5 May 2012 16:08

Be like a flower and chuck fire at her

BoW2Me 0

Saturday 5 May 2012 16:11

Actually, it didn't die. It escaped in time and left another turtle in its place, for it was a ninja. And a mutant. And a teenager.

Comments

nobodylikesyou 3

Saturday 5 May 2012 16:15

He killed a ninja turtle! :(

GreenAppleDP 0

Saturday 5 May 2012 16:51

Because of the Mario reference in the FML, you'd think you would talk about Koopa and not TMNT. Lol

nobodylikesyou 3

Saturday 5 May 2012 17:01

Well him saying turtle before mario made me think of TMNT.

lilpixie21 11

Sunday 6 May 2012 0:55

If it was a ninja it wouldn't be dead I feel sorry for you FYL ):

lilpixie21 11

Sunday 6 May 2012 0:58

FYL OP*

Darkmagic666 9

Saturday 5 May 2012 16:15

That really sucks. I have a turtle and now i keep imagining that D:

DontForgetMe4 0

Saturday 5 May 2012 16:15

Comment moderated for rule-breaking.

Show it anyway

kandi_kid69 15

Saturday 5 May 2012 21:30

15- He should've already known that it was wrong. OP shouldn't need to teach the nephew. Anyway, how could Op forget about his turtle getting squished? ): Poor turtle.

PSpiz 0

Saturday 5 May 2012 16:16

Make sure the shell doesn't bounce back and hit him.

VasilisaUzhasnaj 29

Saturday 5 May 2012 16:51

In this case, make sure it does.

PSpiz 0

Sunday 6 May 2012 6:23

Good point...

Klug_fml 7

Saturday 5 May 2012 16:16

Dress up in a Bowser costume and see how much he likes being Mario then.

craZgal321 6

Saturday 5 May 2012 17:00

5 year old: "Aunt (insert OP's name)?! Aunt (insert OP's name)?!?!?! OP: "how do you like being mario now u little shit??"

wannagofast 3

Saturday 5 May 2012 16:16

You probably should keep him away from mushrooms then...

I_Punch_Babies 7

Saturday 5 May 2012 16:16

bowser wont be too happy to hear about this!

SpottedMew 15

Saturday 5 May 2012 16:20

Kick the little shit

OhDearBetrayal 25

Saturday 5 May 2012 17:54

Remember kids; Violence is always the answer.

maniaccrab 0

Sunday 6 May 2012 22:00

Isn't that how this all began...?

Gothicbunnyx3 16

Saturday 5 May 2012 16:24

Did he get coins?

BradTheBrony 19

Thursday 26 July 2012 8:43

NO! Enemies in Mario don't drop coins, unless you hit them with a fire flower, and that's only in SMW! God, these n00bz0rz! Why can't any 1337 h4x0rz be on this site?