Miscellaneous: Today, my waiter turned to me and asked, "Let me guess, Miss... - FML

By Anonymous - 05/07/2012 19:10 - United States - Findlay

Today, my waiter turned to me and asked, "Let me guess, Miss I'm-not-fat-I'm-fluffy wants a Diet Coke?" FML

I agree, your life sucks 42 786

You deserved it 10 009

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Same thing different taste

By J - 11/02/2009 07:14 - United States

Today, at lunch I ordered a coke. The waiter replied "diet coke?" and I corrected him saying, "No, regular coke." He shook his head and said again, "diet coke." FML

I agree, your life sucks 54 186

You deserved it 8 854

By goldendarkness - 09/07/2016 01:34

Today, my boyfriend and I decided to stop by a drive-thru on the way to his place. I asked him to order a Coke for me, at which point he asked if I wanted to make it a Diet Coke. FML

I agree, your life sucks 11 768

You deserved it 2 967

By hadrienne's pall - 13/05/2016 19:25 - Canada - Markham

Today, I asked a girl at the restaurant I work at if she'd had enough to eat. When she said yes, I said, "Are you sure?" I didn't realize how insulting it sounded until her equally overweight mom was up in my face, demanding to see my manager. FML

I agree, your life sucks 11 977

You deserved it 4 283

By Hungryman - 15/01/2010 21:30 - France

Today, I ordered a Diet Coke with my meal from a fast food restaurant. Turns out, they didn't give me diet. My blood sugar spiked and I was sick for hours later. I'm a diabetic. FML

I agree, your life sucks 40 404

You deserved it 8 253

Thanks Karen

By Anonymous - 26/08/2014 15:30 - United States - Gloucester

Today, I was taking a customer's order, when she said she'd better go for a salad, because she was getting fat. She was actually very slim, so I told her she wasn't fat at all. She took one look at me and snorted "Yeah, not compared to you, that's for sure." FML

I agree, your life sucks 46 684

You deserved it 4 366

By first time at McDonald's in months... - 27/03/2013 05:04 - United States

Today, I was at McDonald's. As I left the counter with the food, I heard the cashier mutter, "Fat ass." I turned around and demanded to see the manager. Once he came and heard the situation, he looked at me and said, "Well, it's not like he's wrong, right?" FML

I agree, your life sucks 43 234

You deserved it 19 347

First impressions

By Anonymous - 03/03/2021 23:01

Today, while on a date, I accidentally ordered "diet water" instead of saying "diet coke". FML

I agree, your life sucks 716

You deserved it 298

Typecast

By nerd - 16/10/2009 15:08 - Singapore

Today, I was on cloud nine when the beautiful waitress I frequently ordered takeaways from told me she didn't need to take my name as she remembers me from before. When I got my food, I saw the sales slip. On it she had written, "Cheeseburger - Fries - Coke - Nerdy guy with bad haircut." FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 422

You deserved it 5 757

By fatty - 29/04/2015 01:36 - United States - West Chester

Today, I was sitting in McDonald's. A lady came up to me and started complaining about the bad service, and asked for the manager. I told her that I didn't work there. "But you must, someone that fat has to work here!" FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 322

You deserved it 5 248

By sportskidguru - 01/02/2009 14:41 - United States

Today, I was refilling some guy's iced tea at bandana's, and the uppity jerk had the gall to ask me if I ever kissed a girl considering how fat I am, how high my voice is, and how little money I make. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 580

You deserved it 3 717

Next

Top comments

plasticsmile42 2

Thursday 5 July 2012 23:04

Wow, what an ass. dont let him/her get to you op!

MainPrism 16

Thursday 5 July 2012 23:05

I really hope you obeyed the cardinal rule of the food industry & waited til after you got your food before telling the waiter what you thought of them... If not, you ate something extra with your food... Pretty much gauranteed...

Comments

HerrBawl 4

Thursday 5 July 2012 23:46

To which you reply "Yes, Waiter-With-No-Chance-Of-Getting-A-Tip"

TheDrifter 23

Thursday 5 July 2012 23:52

Aww, c'mon, a "fluffy" version of Noor taking out her hoops and trash talking, then laying a beat down on the waiter and standing over him with a foot on his chest and a sandwich in one hand, raised like a sword in victory. The mental image I got was awesome.

x_Gainer_x 6

Thursday 5 July 2012 23:53

I would have had that person fired on the spot !!!! I'd go back and launch a complaint with the owner!!!

kimmi41509 10

Thursday 5 July 2012 23:56

And you still ate there? I would have got up, went to the manager, complained, and told them you'd never be back.

princessdee62 4

Thursday 5 July 2012 23:59

Omfg seriously..?! Xp You got him fired right..?

evhrocks876 4

Thursday 5 July 2012 23:59

No tip for that bitch

doglover569 0

Friday 6 July 2012 0:00

Wow heartless and clever... I'm sorry for you that is so mean, but it was a pretty funny insult to read.

beccax33 4

Friday 6 July 2012 0:05

Go tell the manager and get him fired!!! Don't let it get to u OP :)

Myo_fml 20

Friday 6 July 2012 0:12

I would have reported her to her boss on the spot and she certainly would not get a tip from me.

dDailydDosage 8

Friday 6 July 2012 0:13

Rude!?! No fyl, op. Don't let such a jerk even have an effect on your day! Report it and eff HIS life!

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The Top

Today, my girlfriend called and said she had great news. Turns out I've cured her of that illness she gets every month. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 049

You deserved it 21 145

Today, I went to the grocery store, but once I'd filled my cart, I realized that I'd forgotten my wallet, and because I'm not the sort of animal who just dumps stuff in random aisles, I had to awkwardly put all my items back on their shelves. FML

I agree, your life sucks 849

You deserved it 202

The Top

Today, I had a surprise birthday party thrown in my honor. All of my friends and family had been invited, and all of the details were perfect. Who threw the party for me? My ex-girlfriend who I dumped last week for "not being thoughtful enough." FML

I agree, your life sucks 9 053

You deserved it 58 108

Today, my husband found my diary in which I talked about inviting another man into our bedroom. He left for a while and came back with a friend of his. My fantasy may become reality but I'm terrified what it will do to our relationship. I put them off for now, but I don't know what to do. He's all for it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 540

You deserved it 2 037

Today, my girlfriend and I were on the phone. She heard I was out of breath and asked me, "Are you okay?" I didn't have the heart to tell her that she'd caught me masturbating, and I'm so out of shape it sounded like I'd ran a marathon. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 371

You deserved it 1 676

Today, I noticed that my new shampoo had an unfamiliar pink color to it. After some investigation, I found a dead mouse that had apparently cut itself on the bottle pump. I've been washing my hair with mouse blood. FML

I agree, your life sucks 61 861

You deserved it 5 429

Today, I played back the images of the tiny camera I attached to the collar of my cat to figure out where she goes when she disappears for several days at a time. I found my husband with another woman in our bed. FML

I agree, your life sucks 8 603

You deserved it 389

Today, my boyfriend and I were looking through an old photo album of mine. I turned to a page with a picture of me on my last day of college. I thought the picture was quite nice. He turned to me and said, "Don't worry, I take bad pictures too." FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 502

You deserved it 3 490