Kids: Today, my wife told our six year old daughter that the devil... - FML

By Anonymous - 01/09/2011 18:02 - United States

Today, my wife told our six year old daughter that the devil beats his wife whenever there's a rainbow. Now she won't stop crying. FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 740

You deserved it 4 171

Autumn: Leaves and Laughter
When the leaves fall, the laughter rises. Discover autumn stories as crisp as dried leaves! More…

Previous FML Next FML

Same thing different taste

By Nuts - 07/11/2015 02:55 - Canada - Grimsby

Today, my daughter told me she wanted to divorce me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 24 704

You deserved it 3 165

Hail Santa

By Holidayruined - 26/12/2021 10:59

Today, my 16 year-old son had a tantrum over me asking him to clean up his room, and decided to tell my 6 year-old daughter that Santa isn't real, and that it was me who bought her presents. My daughter is inconsolable. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 194

You deserved it 238

By Cherie - 07/12/2010 18:25 - United States

Today, my daughter told my son that Santa is not real. Of course, being a child, he started to cry. My only problem is, my son is 11 and my daughter is 6. FML

I agree, your life sucks 40 184

You deserved it 6 829

By thedancingtit - 07/06/2016 05:11 - United States - Eagle River

Today, I let my brother babysit my 6-year-old daughter. She learned 2 new words from him. One of them was "Hail" and the other one was "Satan". FML

I agree, your life sucks 14 057

You deserved it 2 345

By Anonymous - 30/10/2010 05:07 - New Zealand

Today, my daughter came up to me crying. When I asked her what was wrong, she told me that she had a fight with her imaginary boyfriend. She's 16. I raised this child. FML

I agree, your life sucks 44 806

You deserved it 12 124

By numbnuts - 23/09/2013 05:48 - Canada - Nanaimo

Today, my 2-year-old daughter overheard my wife and I arguing and fixated on one particular insult my wife threw at me. Now my daughter won't stop saying "Daddy a numbnuts", always with a big smile on her face. FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 497

You deserved it 6 061

By lon01t - 07/05/2012 20:43 - United Kingdom - Falkirk

Today, my four-year-old daughter started screaming and lashing out at me as I was getting her ready for a bath. It seems my idiot husband told her she was still small enough to be feasted on by the "drain monster". FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 293

You deserved it 2 647

Weird kid

By maria lucia - 05/04/2021 21:30

Today, my ten-year-old daughter now has a habit of going up to random strangers and acting all scared before pointing behind them and whispering, "El Diablo." FML

I agree, your life sucks 898

You deserved it 204

By FirstDaddy - 16/06/2014 21:38 - United States - Southfield

Today, my daughter told me that she liked her "other daddy" better. I don't know who's she talking about, but my wife is doing a good job telling her to be quiet. FML

I agree, your life sucks 63 289

You deserved it 4 478

Healthy family dynamic

By Matt - 20/03/2024 19:00 - Australia

Today, my wife screamed and threatened to leave me… again. She does this about once a year, in response to an argument that she feels frustrated by. We have three amazing children and we're mostly happy in between these outbursts. Today she did it in front of our 6 year-old, who is now crying about our family. FML

I agree, your life sucks 629

You deserved it 144

Next

Top comments

sydie5 12

Friday 2 September 2011 1:09

She will never look at Skittles the same again...

heyhihello95 12

Friday 2 September 2011 1:08

Now that kid will never be able to enjoy a rainbow, nice going.

Comments

icadragoon 11

Friday 2 September 2011 1:21

WTF?! What's wrong with some people? You're wife needs psychological help and classes on how to raise children.

rattusrattus 18

Friday 2 September 2011 2:10

At least she didn't mention that the devil and his wife are kinky and enjoy it...

fightingkittens 39

Friday 2 September 2011 7:00

^^Epic win.

Rebe_fml 4

Friday 2 September 2011 1:21

At least you don't live in Hawaii.

hairguitarhero 5

Friday 2 September 2011 2:28

Agreed. Agreed.

DuckyMomo 2

Friday 2 September 2011 1:25

What the hell is wrong with ur wife?!?!?!?

Amrel 10

Friday 2 September 2011 1:25

Why would your daughter even give a **** about the devil let alone his wife?

DuckyMomo 2

Friday 2 September 2011 1:25

What the hell is wrong with ur wife?!?!?!?

AzWolf 5

Friday 2 September 2011 1:25

When I was a kid, when it was raining and the sun was shining at the same time, that meant that the devil was beating his wife. It had zero to do with rainbows.

kaengelangeleyes 9

Friday 2 September 2011 8:59

Well when its raining and the sun is shining at the same time, theres almost always rainbows.

Late_night83 25

Friday 2 September 2011 1:27

Lol! That is hilarious.

vandalnofx 0

Friday 2 September 2011 1:28

I do the same thing when I see a rainbow... Sorry honey *smack*

Feklfekl2222 32

Friday 2 September 2011 1:30

WTF.......

codylicious6 0

Friday 2 September 2011 1:35

I wonder what made your wife say that...

1
2
3
4
5
6
7
8
9
10

Keywords

Miscellaneous Awkward Racism Love Money My ex Harassment Work Embarrassing Accident AITA Am I overreacting? Religion Relatable Health Gifts LGBTQIA+ Annoying Inappropriate Teachers Education Animals Dogs Relationship advice Cats Cute Transportation Friends Cars Scams

The Top

Today, I picked up my cat and he went wild because I didn't know he was sleeping. I ended with with several cuts, and one on my wrist. Later, a kid in my high school saw my wrist and told my guidance counselor, who told my parents. Now everyone thinks I'm either a liar, attention whore, or emo. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 251

You deserved it 3 142

Today, my husband woke up with the first boner he’s had in almost 6 years. He yelled for me to join him so we could have sex again like the old days, but by the time I was finished on the toilet and raced to get to him with my pants still round my ankles, he'd gone soft. We’re only in our 30s. FML

I agree, your life sucks 629

You deserved it 163

The Top

Today, I tried buying a video game that was rated "M - for mature". The Cashier told me "you have to be 17 to buy this game". I didn't have any ID on me. I'm 25. FML

I agree, your life sucks 24 968

You deserved it 4 337

Today, I got a new downstairs neighbor. Herpes. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 537

You deserved it 37 393

Today, my stepdaughter called to say hello and to give me a warning: she will do whatever it takes to keep me from having a baby with her dad, including pushing me down the stairs. I'm 12 weeks pregnant, and we were going to tell her this weekend. I'm now petrified of a 10-year-old. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 883

You deserved it 4 404

Today, I decided to work on my social anxiety by ordering some food. I waited in line, practicing my order in my head all the way. When I got to the front, I said my order with no mistakes. The cashier just stared blankly at me until I mumbled, "Never mind..." and left. FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 181

You deserved it 1 605

Today, I was just beginning a calculus exam when my brain thought it was a good time to get stuck on the song "Close Every Door" from Joseph and the Amazing Technicolor Dreamcoat. Now that the exam is over, I'm afraid that I can foresee the future through song. FML

I agree, your life sucks 640

You deserved it 160

Today, I jokingly told my mother to "go fall down a hole" during a mock argument we always have. Not even 10 minutes later, our basement stairs gave out. When I said that, I didn't want her to break both her arms or to actually fall into a gaping hole. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 902

You deserved it 476