Kids: Today, my wife told our six year old daughter that the devil... - FML

By Anonymous - 01/09/2011 18:02 - United States

Today, my wife told our six year old daughter that the devil beats his wife whenever there's a rainbow. Now she won't stop crying. FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 740

You deserved it 4 173

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Same thing different taste

By Nuts - 07/11/2015 02:55 - Canada - Grimsby

Today, my daughter told me she wanted to divorce me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 24 710

You deserved it 3 166

Hail Santa

By Holidayruined - 26/12/2021 10:59

Today, my 16 year-old son had a tantrum over me asking him to clean up his room, and decided to tell my 6 year-old daughter that Santa isn't real, and that it was me who bought her presents. My daughter is inconsolable. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 197

You deserved it 240

By Cherie - 07/12/2010 18:25 - United States

Today, my daughter told my son that Santa is not real. Of course, being a child, he started to cry. My only problem is, my son is 11 and my daughter is 6. FML

I agree, your life sucks 40 188

You deserved it 6 830

By thedancingtit - 07/06/2016 05:11 - United States - Eagle River

Today, I let my brother babysit my 6-year-old daughter. She learned 2 new words from him. One of them was "Hail" and the other one was "Satan". FML

I agree, your life sucks 14 060

You deserved it 2 345

By Anonymous - 30/10/2010 05:07 - New Zealand

Today, my daughter came up to me crying. When I asked her what was wrong, she told me that she had a fight with her imaginary boyfriend. She's 16. I raised this child. FML

I agree, your life sucks 44 810

You deserved it 12 124

By numbnuts - 23/09/2013 05:48 - Canada - Nanaimo

Today, my 2-year-old daughter overheard my wife and I arguing and fixated on one particular insult my wife threw at me. Now my daughter won't stop saying "Daddy a numbnuts", always with a big smile on her face. FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 499

You deserved it 6 062

By lon01t - 07/05/2012 20:43 - United Kingdom - Falkirk

Today, my four-year-old daughter started screaming and lashing out at me as I was getting her ready for a bath. It seems my idiot husband told her she was still small enough to be feasted on by the "drain monster". FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 293

You deserved it 2 647

Weird kid

By maria lucia - 05/04/2021 21:30

Today, my ten-year-old daughter now has a habit of going up to random strangers and acting all scared before pointing behind them and whispering, "El Diablo." FML

I agree, your life sucks 899

You deserved it 204

By FirstDaddy - 16/06/2014 21:38 - United States - Southfield

Today, my daughter told me that she liked her "other daddy" better. I don't know who's she talking about, but my wife is doing a good job telling her to be quiet. FML

I agree, your life sucks 63 293

You deserved it 4 479

Healthy family dynamic

By Matt - 20/03/2024 19:00 - Australia

Today, my wife screamed and threatened to leave me… again. She does this about once a year, in response to an argument that she feels frustrated by. We have three amazing children and we're mostly happy in between these outbursts. Today she did it in front of our 6 year-old, who is now crying about our family. FML

I agree, your life sucks 630

You deserved it 144

Next

Top comments

sydie5 12

Friday 2 September 2011 1:09

She will never look at Skittles the same again...

heyhihello95 12

Friday 2 September 2011 1:08

Now that kid will never be able to enjoy a rainbow, nice going.

Comments

mattdm91 0

Friday 2 September 2011 5:10

Lol your wife sounds awesome! She shouldn't use that kind of humor on a small child though

ohmandapants 16

Friday 2 September 2011 5:11

But...aren't rainbows supposed to be happy?! D:

L3g4lPl4typus 0

Friday 2 September 2011 5:14

oh my god it's a double rainbow

dede9_fml 0

Friday 2 September 2011 5:19

Why on earth would she tell her six year old child that!?

s8n666 0

Friday 2 September 2011 5:21

But it's true.

sweetheartxoxo88 7

Friday 2 September 2011 5:24

Your wife has it all wrong! The devil only beats his wife when it rains while the sun is shinning. Rainbows make him stop!

juicyfruit222 0

Friday 2 September 2011 5:25

Wtf is wrong w her?!?

dakins 0

Friday 2 September 2011 5:27

Ur wife is evil.......... O.o pure evil

perdix 29

Friday 2 September 2011 5:27

Your daughter wasn't crying because of the diabolical spousal abuse. She was crying because her mom is an ignorant ass she doesn't know what "the devil beating is wife means" and she realized that half her DNA is contaminated with stupid genes.

k1ngd1ck 0

Friday 2 September 2011 5:41

She is unfit to be a mother, that beast

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The Top

Today, I demanded to know why my boyfriend takes so long in public toilets. He admitted his ex was such a nasty ho, she would drag him into public toilets whenever she wanted dick in public. So now every time he goes in one, he gets a boner and has to "get rid of it" before he can come out. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 135

You deserved it 349

Today, a girl was tailgating me, even though I was going at speed limit. Annoyed, I drove 10 mph under the speed limit, and every time she honked, I went 5 mph slower. Too bad she got the last laugh… I was pulled over for "reckless driving." FML

I agree, your life sucks 21 007

You deserved it 47 415

The Top

Today, I've been getting terrible backlash from the neighbors after I forbade my kids from hanging out with one of the neighborhood kids. They think I dislike her because she’s trans. The truth is she’s rude, disrespectful, has been in several fights and had run ins with the police. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 174

You deserved it 101

Today, my friend posted my picture on Craigslist under the "men seeking men" section. I got 16 replies with 2 hours. He then decided to post another picture of me under "men seeking women" to compare results. The only reply I got was from a man. FML

I agree, your life sucks 49 763

You deserved it 4 160

Today, I went to an amusement park with my family. A couple of cute girls started talking to me, telling me how much they liked my dreads. Seeing this, my mother stepped up next to me, patted me on the shoulder, and said, "This here is my little baby, treat him nicely!" Thanks, Mom. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 829

You deserved it 4 596

Today, a person I've never met called me a whore and spat on me. Why? Because I was babysitting for my neighbors and answered the door for two well dressed women passing out religious pamphlets. I politely declined to take any. Apparently being a 15 year-old girl caring for a toddler makes me a sex worker. FML

I agree, your life sucks 616

You deserved it 84

Today, a riot broke out while I was on shift at the community swimming pool. A family snuck in soap so they could use the pool as a giant bath tub. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 530

You deserved it 2 785

Today, my 14 year-old daughter is so selfish that on her sister's birthday, she found the present, assumed it must be for her, opened it, then destroyed it when she saw it was frozen Anna and Elsa dolls because she hates Frozen. Her sister loves Frozen, and hasn’t stopped crying over Anna’s severed head. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 394

You deserved it 445