Sex, Lonely and Intimacy: Up your game

Up your game

By Anonymous - 06/05/2009 15:07 - United States

Today, I was giving my friend sex advice when she asked me when was the last time for me. Not only did I lie but I realized that it was in November and the time before that was June. I have had sex less times this year than she has this week. FML

I agree, your life sucks 54 575

You deserved it 12 086

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Same thing different taste

The struggle is real

By Sally - 26/12/2011 11:48 - Australia

Today, my friend told me how depressing it is that she hasn't had sex in two weeks. I haven't had sex in 3 years. FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 684

You deserved it 5 843

By virgo - 30/01/2010 06:50 - France

Today, I had to lie to my therapist about my sex life to make myself feel better. FML

I agree, your life sucks 21 247

You deserved it 6 563

Amnesiac

By sexytime - 02/09/2009 06:33 - United States

Today, my best friend, who I've had serious feelings for for over a year, decided to tell everyone that he hasn't gotten laid in almost two years. When I told him that he was lying, he responded with, "No, I'm not. Who could I possibly have slept with?" We hooked up six months ago. Three times. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 942

You deserved it 4 245

Time flies

By Anonymous - 06/07/2022 22:00

Today, my husband asked if we could have more sex, because we spend every day together, but if he wanted celibacy, he’d have stayed single and spent time with his friends. He then pulled out a diary proving we’ve only had sex twice this year. I was completely unaware it was so infrequent. Whoops. FML

I agree, your life sucks 384

You deserved it 2 010

By Anonymous - 15/06/2014 19:22 - United Kingdom

Today, I found out that my wife has had more sex in the last two months than I have in our last year of marriage. FML

I agree, your life sucks 67 107

You deserved it 6 386

It's not a competition, but still…

By Shooter71 - 16/10/2010 04:09 - France

Today, I discovered my wife has had more sex in the last two months than I've had in the last year. FML

I agree, your life sucks 46 291

You deserved it 3 822

By rj - 12/05/2012 14:42 - United States - Goddard

Today, my wife told me she was pregnant. I don't remember having sex since last year. FML

I agree, your life sucks 40 573

You deserved it 5 832

Ace of Spades

By Simon Edhouse - 13/09/2021 09:00 - New Zealand - Auckland

Today, my wife has initiated sex less than five times in the 18 years we've been married. If I don't mention it, then she doesn't have to bother. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 153

You deserved it 242

Very sexy and highly romantic

By Anonymous - 11/06/2024 14:00 - United States - Lynbrook

Today, my girlfriend said she’s been wanting to have sex lately. We haven’t done it in so long, I've lost track. We still haven’t done it. Part of me wants to fuck someone else. FML

I agree, your life sucks 231

You deserved it 619

By AnonymousAmber - 31/10/2014 23:10 - United States - Yadkinville

Today, my best friend told me that she was a virgin again because she hadn't had sex in 6 months. She's 19 and actually believes it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 169

You deserved it 2 870

fretforyerlatte 0

Wednesday 6 May 2009 20:10

i guess you're not in much of a position to give her advice then, huh? unless you used to get it on all the time or something.

Arian_fml 0

Wednesday 6 May 2009 20:13

Why did you lie? And what makes you a sex guru?

Comments

showwstopper 0

Wednesday 6 May 2009 21:10

ohhh thats a burnn ... you werejust on the sex airplane .. and it just CRASHED && BURNED :] haha sorry

Yulia_fml 0

Wednesday 6 May 2009 21:11

Whatever, it means you're selective. Unless you're guy, which means you must be failing at fulfilling your evolutionary mission to bang as many chicks as is humanly possible in the span of one year.

frootloop25 0

Wednesday 6 May 2009 21:12

...Who cares...? It's better not to have sex these days anyways. Have you seen the pregnancy rate?!

SomeGuy1234 0

Wednesday 6 May 2009 21:17

That sucks, not only are you not having sex but your friend is a ****.

jeezEpeas 0

Wednesday 6 May 2009 21:19

why is this a FML?? Be glad you're not a *****.

I_am_stupid_also 6

Wednesday 6 May 2009 21:21

Is she is having sex with more than two people in one week, the best sex advice you could give would be to tell her to stop being a ****, or start charging for it.

cutiepie29 0

Wednesday 6 May 2009 21:24

Ha I have sex at least once a day what a fat ass

LilKonvicted 0

Wednesday 6 May 2009 21:25

OMG REALLY?

woahmanmeaghan 0

Wednesday 6 May 2009 21:25

....fewer* times than your friend. also, how is your friend a ****? what's wrong with having a lot of sex? nothing. such a double standard--guys do it and no one says anything. a girl wants to have a lot of sex, she's a *****. grow up.

deja54 0

Wednesday 6 May 2009 21:27

lol Let's see. My scenario. Married girl asks friend for sex advice. Said friend realizes she hasn't sex in forever. Makes FML. Idiots call married girl a **** for having sex like a human being. Deja54 remarks how stupid the average person on the internet is. The world keeps turning. I hate people.