Miscellaneous: You're not my real mom

You're not my real mom

By violatedbuttcrack - This FML is from back in 2013 but it's good stuff - Australia - Sydney

Today, while on an escalator, instead of just telling me my underwear label was hanging out of my jeans, a woman behind me decided to tuck the label in herself. You should never have to feel a stranger's finger on your butt crack. FML

I agree, your life sucks 56 667

You deserved it 5 474

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Same thing different taste

By Ella - 21/01/2009 17:56 - United States

Today, I went to the bathroom and didn't realize my skirt was tucked in my ugliest underwear until I reached the elevator. Thanks for not telling me girl-in-the-yellow-shirt. FML

I agree, your life sucks 22 438

You deserved it 5 129

By Emmy - 02/10/2011 06:36 - United States

Today, while I was on the up escalator, a small woman in front of me farted directly into my face. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 373

You deserved it 3 363

Public surprise

By Pants-Girl - 24/11/2019 08:00 - Canada

Today, I was out walking downtown. A woman walking behind the thought that my pants were hanging too low. She came over to me and yanked my pants up. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 056

You deserved it 2 508

By just_a_bit_akwRd - 04/08/2009 04:15 - United States

Today, I was putting on my new pair of jeans, when my girlfriend walked in. She found the "XS" size sticker on the side of my pants, held it for a little while then put it on my crotch. She then looked at me, gave a little shrug and half-smile and walked away. FML

I agree, your life sucks 50 687

You deserved it 7 813

By Jac - 17/01/2010 19:59 - United States

Today, my friend decided to pants me in the middle of the mall. I wasn't wearing underwear. FML

I agree, your life sucks 20 783

You deserved it 32 833

Put it away!

By Need eye bleach - 05/04/2023 17:00 - United States

Today, a woman had a wardrobe malfunction right in front of me. As if that's not awkward enough, that woman was my own mother. FML

I agree, your life sucks 695

You deserved it 147

By grossed out - 21/09/2016 09:21 - Australia - Melbourne

Today, whilst in a dressing room trying on some new clothes, I experienced the sheer terror of having someone fling a pair of dirty panties over the stall wall only to make off with some stolen ones, whilst you're still standing there in shock staring at another woman's dirty underwear. FML

I agree, your life sucks 14 057

You deserved it 1 282

By grabber - 09/08/2009 23:43 - United States

Today, I was riding up an escalator in the mall in uncomfortable high heels. While adjusting my bag I suddenly lost my balance and began flailing wildly. In desperation I hurled forward and ended up grabbing a teenage boy's buttocks and was promptly slapped by his girlfriend. FML

I agree, your life sucks 44 356

You deserved it 11 009

By sufia - 29/09/2016 11:14 - Pakistan

Today, I was traveling. At airport security, the woman patting me down felt something "down there" and asked me what I was wearing. I told her it was a sanitary napkin. She put her hands inside my pants just to be sure. FML

I agree, your life sucks 15 354

You deserved it 1 170

By Anonymous - 26/01/2015 23:24 - Sweden - Huddinge

Today, I realized why you should never wear a thong under yoga pants that are a couple of sizes too small. It's a weird thing, seeing your co-worker's anus. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 952

You deserved it 3 139

camsterjoe 12

Thursday 16 May 2013 16:31

Some people would be delighted to have that sort of action.

Dracoboxer357 35

Thursday 16 May 2013 16:32

Butt I'll bet you'll never forget to check for it from now on, will you? ;)

Comments

Daschundman 17

Thursday 16 May 2013 17:01

How do you know it was a finger...

Gardevoir_fml 12

Thursday 16 May 2013 17:06

All of these comments are just terrible

olpally 32

Thursday 16 May 2013 17:28

Yours is the worst comment! Lol.

newburton13 26

Thursday 16 May 2013 17:22

I would've punched her down the escalator, that's sexual harassment in my book.

MzZombicidal 36

Thursday 16 May 2013 20:06

You seem to have a pretty strict book!

KVKdragon 26

Thursday 16 May 2013 20:59

I don't get why this is so down voted. I'd do the same thing or something similar (like pushing her away) . I don't let strangers touch me without permission (no jokes please about if I do give permission to random strangers -_-)

MzZombicidal 36

Friday 17 May 2013 15:29

Because she was probably trying to help and absentmindedly fixed it. Who knows, she could have immediately realized her mistake a little too late and was embarrassed as well. How would punching or pushing down an escalator be equal to tucking a pant tag in? Give her a break!

DDCA 24

Thursday 16 May 2013 17:35

Cracks kills. Strippers thrill, then take all your money and buy themselves pills. But seriously OP, she could have at least bought you or Orange Julius or a corn dog before trying to get to third base on the escalator with you.

HortonThelephant 15

Thursday 16 May 2013 17:40

You get a thumbs up from me! I think this community gets too easily bent out of shape on occasion. I can understand being reprimanded for for the obvious and mundane, but if you genuinely have a sentiment you wish to further express, I say go for it!

D3ATHZ3RO 15

Thursday 16 May 2013 17:52

****** weirdo

Zebediabolical 39

Thursday 16 May 2013 18:01

Isn't that fifth base aka home run?

sabrinaacrow 26

Thursday 16 May 2013 18:02

I love your name "violatedbuttcrack"

Zebediabolical 39

Thursday 16 May 2013 18:04

When we were in high school we'd leave our shirt tags out on purpose. Just to get the girls to tuck them in for us. Yeah, pretty lame I know, but if they didn't like you they wouldn't do it. I guess it was a sort of barometer.