You wanker

By dinosaucer - 12/10/2011 00:19 - United States

Spicy
Today, I was accused of masturbating during work. I was actually just getting something out of my pocket. FML
I agree, your life sucks 34 300
You deserved it 3 563
Autumn: Leaves and Laughter
When the leaves fall, the laughter rises. Discover autumn stories as crisp as dried leaves! More…
Previous FML Next FML

Same thing different taste

Next

Top comments

j_cat187 19

Umm yea let me just get my.... Umm hold on a sec...almost done. O wait, my pen is in my shirt pocket. How embarrassing.

65 4

Comments

paintingxflowers 8

This reminds me of The Office. "What's in your pocket?" "A Chunky."

11 4
ariannaimelda 7

Is that a banana in your pocket or are you just happy to see me?

17 7
enonymous 8

Was it a hot pocket? Pro tip: don't put a heated hot pocket in your pants... No matter how much they claim it's made for the pocket your penis will get 2nd degree burns from the cheese.

32 5
WaSiSimiLang 8

...So why is there a fresh stain in the middle of your pants?

7 2
nublets 12

Didn't you tell them you got you're new pocket sports game and you were just finishing level 1?

0 4
babybrunette128 8

Sure op, " just getting something out of your pocket ". Sure sure that's what they all say

8 5
HomeAl0ne 20

Worse if it's a piss soaked candy bar and you therefore can't show them what you were actually doing.

2 7
Zeek63 0

So that is what the cool kids are calling it these days?

6 1
seldom66 16

Op- it took you 20 minutes to get something out of your pocket...?

0 4
DerekBlaskie 6

He failed to mention for how long and in what angry fashion he was getting something out of his pockets.. ;] we've all been that desperate at one point in life op no need to be embarrassed.

0 1
j_cat187 19

Umm yea let me just get my.... Umm hold on a sec...almost done. O wait, my pen is in my shirt pocket. How embarrassing.

65 4
mrahhhhh 21

I've got something in my front pocket for you. Why don't you reach down in my pocket and see what it is? Then grab onto it, it's just for you. Give a little squeeze and say: "How do you do?" There's something in my front pocket... There's something in my front pocket... There's something in my front pocket!

16 18
FYLDeep 25

I tap dance so hard to that song.

22 1
ollie179 21

I'll just get my pencil from my pocket... EWW you sicko!

8 11
kindgremlin 5

Totally off topic, but Bridport Dorset is beautiful, too bad I've only seen photos.

3 6
SilentTreatment 7

Yeah!!! Playin a quick game of 8 ball corner pocket! ;D

2 7