By Joey - 06/02/2009 22:51 - United States
The Top
By heretoserve - 27/09/2014 04:22 - United States - Winchester
By Anonymous - 30/08/2013 21:05 - United States - Utica
By imchacon22 - 26/10/2013 22:42 - United States - Fort Riley
imchacon22 tells us more.
By Anonymous - 19/04/2010 20:36 - United States
Traumatized
By Anonymous - 09/09/2009 04:23 - United States
Disinformation
By zzyx - 22/09/2009 03:19 - United States
By Anonymous - 07/04/2014 17:43 - Canada - Ottawa
By Candycane88 - 26/03/2013 14:12 - United States - Hemet
Candycane88 tells us more.
Lol he wasn't joking, but he wasn't trying to insult me either, in his mind that comment was trying to insult the guy hitting on me, strangely my hubby adores me and is a great guy, it's just funny the way it came out.
By save me - 30/05/2014 22:33 - Belgium - Antwerpen
By TzarErik - 06/08/2014 23:33 - United States - Fort Collins
Both ends
By sickofsick - 30/12/2009 03:11 - United States
Gender bending
By Recluse - 21/11/2014 18:18
Dad pranks '09
By PISSED - This FML is from back in 2009 but it's good stuff - Germany
By a-scared - 06/08/2009 22:18 - United States
By danceinconverse - 23/09/2014 18:04 - Canada - Richmond Hill
danceinconverse tells us more.
Just followed up on my recently accepted FML, so thought I should explain this one too! Everyone's comments seriously made me laugh by the way. Especially the shrek one, my boyfriend really appreciated that. To everyone saying "you mean ex boyfriend?", no. (Let me explain). If I dated a guy who legitimately did this, you can bet your bottom dollar he would be kicked to the curb. But I have to admit, I only posted a small portion of the full story. He actually mimed doing this as a joke in front of our friends, but unfortunately he managed to unintentionally get a little booger on his hand and actually wipe it in his hair. I informed him, and he ran to the bathroom with a mortified look to shower. And no, we will never let him live it down! Mwahahaha!
By miseventshappen - 09/11/2009 05:49 - United States
By j_babydoll6520 - 26/08/2011 11:09 - Australia
By jellyybean - 05/09/2011 17:05 - United States
Phone-blocked
By unamyous - 08/06/2012 13:26 - United States - Canoga Park
By Tired - 05/08/2010 18:38 - United States
By Anonymous - 31/07/2014 17:28 - United States - San Francisco
Bake off
By sadman - 07/05/2011 23:10 - United States
By hh. - 05/12/2014 21:13 - United States - Clear Lake
By Anonymous - 31/12/2013 19:36 - United Kingdom - Aylesbury
By anonymous - 08/03/2010 15:12 - United States
By even axe would smell better - 04/02/2014 18:55 - United Kingdom - Aylesbury
By King_of_hearts - 04/04/2014 23:46 - United States - Plymouth
By anonymous - 24/10/2010 16:14 - United States
By ColoradoGirl420 - 24/03/2014 18:53 - United States - Colorado Springs
ColoradoGirl420 tells us more.
Hey All. I did immediately go wash up once I confirmed that he was okay, he thought I was going to kick him out for moshing, I don't think he realized quite yet that his nose was broken, he was pretty drunk. And I am a chick, not a dude :) I get tested regularly anyway, but he and I did have a conversation after he went and cleaned himself up too. I explained that I was worried about disease and he looked positively horrified at the thought and insisted that he was clean. But I did get checked, came back all good. And I love my job, it's only part time, I only work the big shows, been doing it for a while and this is the only time this has ever happened to me. It didn't scare me off like my boss thought it would when he saw me marching off in a huff to the ladies room to clean myself up! lol
Keywords
Just to clear things up it is technically my house. My parents are rather well off and gave me a house and it's under my name. This was before we got married. Things he bought before we got married are technically his and things we have gotten since we have been married are ours. And for the person who said he defended our country so he should be allowed to do that, no honey just because he served our country doesn't make him entitled to make decisions like this without me. His mom has only met me once when she came to stay with us and in that short week she managed to insult me each and every single day and to act like she was running things. She isn't in need either it's just that his sister and brother don't want her living with them either because of the way she acts and demands things so I guess he's doing it to get her off their backs. But anyways maybe he'll change his mind or she will get a job and a place of her own.