By Anonymous - 26/08/2015 07:45 - India - Kolkata
All the FMLs
By Whiteheads - 26/08/2015 04:33 - United States - Beaumont
Whiteheads tells us more.
By whovian221b - 25/08/2015 22:46 - United States
By FlyAwayPlease - 25/08/2015 22:38 - United Kingdom - Mold
By NocturnalFox - 25/08/2015 19:46 - Czech Republic - Plzen
By shit.jpg - 25/08/2015 19:22 - United States - Waban
By Anonymous - 25/08/2015 18:31 - United States - Springfield
By Anonymous - 25/08/2015 17:44 - United Kingdom - Saint Leonards
By Schizomaniac - 25/08/2015 17:33 - United States
Schizomaniac tells us more.
Thankfully he's only a PE teacher. Not to discredit PE teachers, but at least he is not in a position to actually provide information to students. This guy is an absolute nutjob. These are real claims he has argued in the past: -evolution is a lie (no surprise) -dogs are more intelligent than chimpanzees -our most sophisticated equipment can't see outside our galaxy (lol) -humans are the only animals that rely on fruits and vegetables for food And many, many others. He's the type of person to argue with a chef because he read a cookbook. It's sad.
By Shelling Ford - 25/08/2015 11:55 - Germany - Munich
By Anon - 25/08/2015 10:10 - New Zealand - Auckland
By Anonymous - 25/08/2015 06:49 - United States
By Anonymous - 25/08/2015 05:51 - United States - Waco
Is gift
By catlady - 25/08/2015 03:16 - United States - Clifton Park
By Animeislyfe - 25/08/2015 02:56 - United States - Stockbridge
By SilentSin - 25/08/2015 02:02 - United States - Canton
SilentSin tells us more.
OP here. I just wanna clear things up. I work third shift and go to college full time, so yes, I do take naps every now and then before work (usually right after classes), and the two dogs I own are a Pomeranian and a chihuahua terroir, both of which are two very small breeds of dogs. So for those saying that dogs are meant for protection, yeah, not these. Pomeranians are very defensive of their territory, so no matter who or what my Pom sees or hears outside, she'll bark like crazy. The chihuahua usually does the same thing; they bark even when they hear me open the garage door. No, I never heard the intruder break in and yes, I have trained the dogs both to silence the barking but only on command. So since they were in a different room than me, I went and commanded them to silence, and yes I didn't think there was a burglar in the house because like I said earlier, these dogs bark at EVERYTHING. Being distracted by the dogs, I did get KO'd but it wasn't for too long. I woke up only minutes after, called police and managed to catch the thief, so it's all good now. I hope this clears things up and that y'all have a fantastic day!
By Szaszaspasz - 24/08/2015 22:35 - Canada - Victoria
Szaszaspasz tells us more.
Hi! It's the OP. The blister formed earlier in the day because of a new pair of running shoes I was breaking in. The blister didn't seem too bad, but it got filled up as the day progressed. As I got into the car, it burst. I never let on because my shoes were not open-toes. The date was great, we went to Pizza Hut, but I got tomato sauce on my outfit. I'm a klutz FML This was in 1990. I was too nervous to run back up to my barracks and do something about the blister. I was 19 at the time.
By wellthen - 24/08/2015 21:56 - United States
Freaked out
By Anonymous - 24/08/2015 19:18 - United States - San Francisco
By Anonymous - 24/08/2015 18:59 - United States
By Anonymous - 24/08/2015 17:32 - United States
By Annie - 24/08/2015 08:46 - United Kingdom - London
By ealovan - 24/08/2015 04:18 - United States - Des Moines
ealovan tells us more.
op here. it's always cool when your FML gets posted because in a weird way it makes the situation a little bit better lol. just some clarification, i started this job a little over a month ago and when i went to the orientation, they gave us $15 dollar gift cards. it was after a 9 hour shift when this sweet old man asked for some change. i remembered i had this gift card in my wallet for a month now and figured he would benefit from it more than i would. i was tired and it was dark outside, but i should have payed more attention. once i realized this mistake i quickly went back to my work, and luckily he was still there. he was very sweet and figured i handed him the wrong card, i gave him the right card and now everyones happy. i'm just glad it was him because god knows what any other person would have done with it.
By JadeDemolition - 24/08/2015 01:40 - United States - San Francisco
By Arrkyna - 23/08/2015 17:42
By AlicefromIreland - 23/08/2015 17:39 - Ireland
AlicefromIreland tells us more.
What happened was when we were told to wave the phones in the air I flung my arm up a bit too fast and my phone flew out of my hand and this "huge woman" (in talking morbidly obese, bundles me out of the way and snatched my phone from the air. I never saw her or the phone again...
By Anonymous - 23/08/2015 17:34
I did not see that coming
By Anonymous - 23/08/2015 16:46 - United States - San Francisco
By Anonymous - 23/08/2015 14:03 - United States - Charlotte
By Anonymous - 23/08/2015 12:35 - Australia
Keywords
OP here, I made an account to reply. To clarify a bit, I'm 19, so I've been dealing with acne for a while and have my face pretty well under control. I said I need to take a bath in acne cream because it's mostly my shoulders and back, and no amount of washing and scrubbing seems to help. Thanks for the funny comments and advice :)