Intimacy: Addicted

Addicted

By oddgrrl99 - 23/07/2013 22:42 - United States - Portage

Today, my husband removed the TV from our bedroom to improve our sex life. Still no sex because he watches TV on his iPhone. FML

I agree, your life sucks 54 550

You deserved it 4 760

Carnival of Disasters
Dive into carnival, where hilarious costumes meet unexpected mishaps. Laughter is guaranteed, mask or no mask! More…

Previous FML Next FML

Same thing different taste

By Anonymous - 25/08/2015 19:54 - United States - Phoenix

Today, my husband told me that he is done having sex because it eats up his online gaming time. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 015

You deserved it 3 543

By lonelygal69 - 19/08/2015 05:54 - United States - Stafford

Today, my husband decided he'd rather jerk off to the Wii Fit trainer than have sex with me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 157

You deserved it 3 808

By Nomoresandwish - 29/11/2009 08:55 - United States

Today, when I had a go at my husband for spending way too much time in front of the TV, he pointed the remote control at me while miming turning down the volume in order to make me shut up. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 218

You deserved it 13 470

By erjazo - 31/12/2013 21:19 - United States - Morris

Today, I was watching TV with my husband, and he started getting frisky. When the commercial break started, we started having sex. When he came, there were still two commercials left before the show resumed. FML

I agree, your life sucks 59 293

You deserved it 6 861

Randy

By Anonymous - 09/05/2024 19:00

Today, it took me two hours to put all the kids to bed, so all I wanted to do was watch TV but my husband, who'd spent all that time asleep on the sofa, started pestering me for sex like he thought he deserved it after I'd asked him for help 3 times before just doing all the work myself. FML

I agree, your life sucks 553

You deserved it 181

ESPN Love

By pieceofcake163 - 29/12/2009 08:59 - United States

Today, I found out that my booty call only likes to have sex with me so afterwards he can watch ESPN on my plasma screen TV, because he has neither. FML

I agree, your life sucks 11 622

You deserved it 17 110

Young love

By Anonymous - 09/10/2024 19:00

Today, on our honeymoon, we’ve only had sex twice. Meanwhile, my husband has masturbated to porn at least once a day since we've got here, and it’s super obvious because he gets sleepy as hell after sex or a wank, while I’m left frustrated with nothing to do except watch Netflix and start drinking before noon. FML

I agree, your life sucks 493

You deserved it 173

By ConfusedDad - 29/12/2013 07:01 - United States

Today, I went to my bedroom for some alone time while my daughter watched TV. I didn't realize that my iPad was still connected to the Apple TV, until I hit play on some porn and heard a scream from the other room. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 525

You deserved it 59 098

Frustrated

By Anonymous - 22/06/2021 14:01 - Malaysia

Today, my husband and I had a huge fight; I asked him if he could spend a few nights with me instead of his PS5. We haven't had sex in 2 months because he is always playing the PS5 at night till late, and he wakes up late too. This means no opportunities to have sex at night, or the morning. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 872

You deserved it 311

By Anonymous - 22/11/2014 18:18 - Ireland - Kilkenny

Today, I was having some rare good sex with my husband, when he suddenly said, "I'm fuckin' BORED," and pulled out so he could go play his video games. FML

I agree, your life sucks 46 194

You deserved it 5 623

Dswank620 18

Wednesday 24 July 2013 8:47

Send him some nudes in the midst of his t.v. watching

darwinism 30

Wednesday 24 July 2013 8:57

Next time tell him "Honey, can you turn your voume down? I like to hear my vibrator as it pleases me"

Comments

ecascio2010 9

Saturday 14 September 2013 20:22

I think it's time for counseling.

raspberryboo 10

Tuesday 19 November 2013 20:50

TV shouldn't be more exciting than sex I'm just saying

FML on Facebook

Keywords

Work Coworkers Health Money Awkward Sex Intimacy Love Parents Cheating Family Engagement Proposal Miscellaneous Delivery Customers Coffee Painful Embarrassing Friends Relatable Weddings Gross Kids Shoes Scary Phobias Spiders Romantic TV shows

The Top

Today, I was helping my mom look for some money she'd misplaced. At my wit's end, I flipped through her diary, in case she'd hidden it between the pages as she has before. Didn't find the money, but I did find out she might well be cheating on my dad. FML

I agree, your life sucks 43 414

You deserved it 8 309

Today, after a long day at work, I fell asleep in my living room. When I woke up, I saw a man leaving my bedroom wearing my pajamas, and I started screaming as he casually left. The cops came and apparently he's mentally ill. He truly believed it was his house. FML

I agree, your life sucks 9 320

You deserved it 561

The Top

Today, I'm a church girl. I grew up believing Christ is my savior and He still is, and I could not live peacefully without Him, but then I started falling in love with a girl, which is clearly written in the Bible to be wrong. I don't know what to do because all I ever want is to love this girl completely. FML

I agree, your life sucks 740

You deserved it 468

Today, I received numerous text messages from my parents asking where I was and how worried they are. I was in my room, they didn't even notice me walk in. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 057

You deserved it 3 101

Today, a student's mother sent me an e-mail complaining that I was requiring her child to read a book containing mild profanity. She then demanded me to let him read an easier book. This would've been somewhat acceptable if the student wasn't in the 12th grade. FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 197

You deserved it 2 892

Today, I went in to pick my wedding dress. My fiancé's ex-girlfriend was my consultant. She basically hinted that I looked fat in every dress. FML

I agree, your life sucks 947

You deserved it 202

Today, my roommate gets up at 3:30am for work and wakes me up each time. I try not to complain about it, but whenever I come back to the apartment at midnight, she gets mad that I woke her up. I told her that she wakes me up in the morning, but apparently that’s different because she’s going to work. FML

I agree, your life sucks 497

You deserved it 143

Today, I heard my neighbors having a violent argument in their front yard. I listened in, and soon found out why the wife wasn't happy with her husband. Apparently, she had caught her husband peeking through my windows for the second time this month. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 933

You deserved it 2 398