Weird, Dreams and Love: Good to know

Good to know

By DeadScared - 19/09/2011 00:23 - Canada

Today, my boyfriend kindly informed me that if I ever got bitten during a zombie apocalypse, he'd love me enough to beat me to death with a tire iron. He said this because he's been having vivid dreams about it happening. I honestly don't know whether he's joking or not. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 014

You deserved it 3 566

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Same thing different taste

By Anonymous - 04/02/2010 08:29 - United States

Today, my boyfriend informed me that in the event of a zombie apocalypse, he'd kill me before I got infected. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 790

You deserved it 7 816

By Anonymous - 24/08/2012 21:10 - United Kingdom - Walsall

Today, a baseball bat fell on my head while my boyfriend and I were cuddling. The same baseball bat that he keeps next to the bed, because he genuinely fears a zombie outbreak. FML

I agree, your life sucks 23 227

You deserved it 3 875

By Anonymous - 21/08/2015 19:02 - United States - Minneapolis

Today, I overheard my husband telling his friend that he wished a zombie apocalypse would happen in real life, so he could take me out back and shoot me without having to worry about going to prison. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 563

You deserved it 2 628

Wuss

By scaredy cat - 09/08/2020 14:02

Today, my boyfriend is completely obsessed with zombie and horror movies. I don’t care what he watches, the only problem is the big wuss has horrible thrashing nightmares. Last night he thrashed so hard, he elbowed me in the face. I have a big swollen purple knot right on my forehead. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 569

You deserved it 183

By lily389 - 21/03/2011 05:02

Today, my boyfriend had a bad dream that a horse was biting his fingers off. He punched the horse in the neck, and in real life punched me in the spine. Twice. FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 305

You deserved it 4 082

By toughbf - 27/09/2011 08:28 - Canada

Today, my boyfriend asked me to beat him up so he could look tough around his friends. When I just stared at him, he added, "Please don't break anything though. Nothing too serious." FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 834

You deserved it 3 800

By StillBetterThanTwilight - 28/08/2012 15:56 - United States - Minneapolis

Today, my boyfriend told me that he had once been possessed by demons, and that he now sleeps with a knife under his pillow for protection from, "The dark spirits that are feasting upon his soul." I'm not sure that I'll be sleeping over anytime soon. FML

I agree, your life sucks 24 589

You deserved it 2 608

By zombieguyswife - 28/06/2012 23:44 - United States - Branson

Today, I found out that the only way I can convince my husband to start working out is by convincing him that we are training for when the "zombie outbreak" happens. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 084

You deserved it 3 982

By fmmmmlll - 12/06/2012 05:29 - United States

Today, my boyfriend brought up the time he said he'd love me until the day he died. He continued by saying, "So, let's just pretend I died today." FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 201

You deserved it 2 450

By Anonymous - 17/01/2012 06:43 - United States

Today, my boyfriend shared with me his anxiety about death, so I shared with him one of my ridiculously irrational fears. He thought I was making fun of him and now won't talk to me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 944

You deserved it 5 620

zman1422 3

Monday 19 September 2011 5:56

He really does care!

Stealthed 8

Monday 19 September 2011 6:02

There's no joke about a zombie apocalypse.

Comments

OfficeNinja 5

Monday 19 September 2011 19:33

tell him in the event of a douche bag apocalypse you will love him enough to dump him - then announce that the apocalypse has happened just now...

TheHarvardian 25

Monday 19 September 2011 20:00

I would be mildly terrified if I were you. If he starts having really realistic nightmares, its possible that he might hurt you while still sleeping/half asleep. Perhaps you need to have a serious conversation with this man.

SamanthaSaurus 13

Monday 19 September 2011 20:12

Welcome to the United States of Zombieland.

BritLass 15

Monday 19 September 2011 20:14

At least you know he'll take care of you! ;)

Neonnight 0

Monday 19 September 2011 20:21

Zombie time

psuedodragon 23

Monday 19 September 2011 20:53

I can't believe your upset about this. Clearly he should dump you, because in the event of the Zompocalyse you are not going to be prepared and will just slow him down and decrease his chances of survival. You need to be able to depend on your group... it is a matter of survival after all...