wow these arguments are ridiculous.... some people shave down there and some people don't some people like it shaved some don't ppl on here make arguments that are irrelevant to this FML like that it is easier for guys to shave then girls?! that has nothing to do with this FML.....

First off, I'm really amazed at how much controversy this post has generated! It's actually pretty cool. I'd also like to say that the guy who wrote this into FML was probably mostly joking--many of the FML's on the site have a nice ironic and satiric edge to them and I think that this may be one of them. That's what makes FML so much fun to read. If the site was a montage of horrible, horrible, life events that had a daily devastating impact on a person's life, no one would find them very funny at all. Rather than the post, what I'm most astounded and horrified by are some of the attitudes so prevalent on this page--as well as the complete refusal to listen to a person's view when presented in a calm, rational, manner even if it differs from their own. For Vanillafire, nightngale, and adelaide_evening: While I don't agree with some of the personal attacks made in these posts, I think that you all make generally excellent posts! I love you guys! For ipreferblondes and organisedchaos: While I also don't appreciate your personal attacks on other commenters, I do understand (most of) your arguments, and I have to say I disagree with nearly every one of them. Because this post has gotten so long and covered such a variety of topics, I'm going to subtitle my responses by topic, rather than by who posted what. "Clean" Shaven I will repeat what has been said very clearly already again because it seems to have not made an impact--a completely shaven vulva is NOT cleaner. Ironically, its actually dirtier (all you guys who keep stating that you'll only go down on a girl when she's shaved please note this). The pubic hair serves as a barrier to prevent E. coli from the colon moving into the ****** and urethra (which causes nasty urinary tract infections). When this hair is removed, it increases the amount of E. coli that is able to spread. Please also note that guys are not exempt from this! You have just as much E. coli going on down there (your hair acts as a barrier too!) and are simply less likely to get UTIs from it because your urethra is ~8 X longer than the average woman's (1-1.5 inches vs. 8). Trimming vs. shaving is actually the better option if you prefer a sculpted/groomed look. Overall, shaving really is less clean--and it is not a "myth" that it increases the average woman's chances for a yeast infection as well (which also sucks for a woman's partner). If you're a woman and don't believe me, please ask your doctor directly. Even gyno's sometimes don't feel comfortable criticizing a woman's grooming preference. Beards: Public vs. Private Hair Vanillafire brought up the excellent point that pubic hair is "private" hair and most other body hair (ie: leg and armpit hair) is "public" hair. I'm going to respond to Organisedchaos' comments about his beard. A beard is the ultimate definition of public hair--you can wear long pants and a long-sleeved shirt and not a single soul (besides your lover and yourself) will know that you haven't shaved a thing. This is not true with a man and his beard unless he chooses to wear a mask (which would be dorky and suspicious :) ). Everyone you meet on a daily basis will see your face, so I personally would liken your grooming of your beard most closely to a woman's decision to style her hair. I fail to see how there is any link between shaving your face (and I personally love full, trimmed beards--sexiest thing ever) and shaving done by either sex in a very intimate and private place. Additionally, I'm sorry that you get razor burn daily on your face, but if you are aware of the discomfort, why would you wish that your gf suffer through it even occasionally? I get razor burn on my legs and in my armpits every time I shave (which is frequently/nearly daily). I once tried shaving down there, but I had the worst razor burn I could imagine and decided that I'd never do it again--and that was before I knew about the health risks. A Societal Norm? There have been a few mentions of shaving as a societal norm--and while I think this has become true for legs and armpits in the US (please remember this is only the case since WWII when nylons were not readily available and is still not commonly the case in Europe), I don't think that completely shaving your vulva or penis/testes has. Of all the women I lived with in college (both dorm-wise and house-wise) only a single woman had her vulva "shaved." She had actually paid $5,000 for laser hair removal because shaving was physically a problem for her (razor burn, etc) and she felt such pressure to have a "sexy cha cha." Most woman I knew trimmed, though not all did. Also, every man I've heard discuss this, save one, all preferred their partners trimmed rather than shaved. Though this is clearly not the norm, and it may have something to do with my social circle, or having always lived in severe winter climates (no bathing suit season... :( ). A Sign of Love and Commitment? I fail to see how a woman or man who refuses to shave down there, even if their partner hates it, doesn't care about their partner. I think that you can truly love someone while still maintaining the distinction that your body is your own while their body is their own. Isn't such respect the basis of a relationship? Shaving your vulva/penis isn't a sign of your commitment to another person. And please don't respond with ridiculous statements about how if a girl/guy respects his/her partner they would shave just to please them. Ultimately that partner should respect the body of the person he/she chose to be with (and I personally feel this is the case with beards/clean-shaven faces too). A Link to Marital Bliss? I personally find no link in a woman or man's decision not to shave and marriage failure. Nor do I think that it is remotely acceptable for either a man or woman to cheat if their partner is not shaven to their standards. Even for "special occasions" while it may not be unhygienic or unhealthy as a one time thing, if the razor burn presents a serious problem or your gf/bf feels really uncomfortable with the idea, you should also respect that (just as I'm sure he/she respects your desire to have him/her clean shaven but just doesn't feel comfortable about it). Refusal to trim doesn't make a man OR a woman "self-involved" or selfish. "Real Men," "Hormones," and "Chivalry" This is one I'm having a hard time fathoming. Ipreferblondes: I have met one woman in my entire life (not that I'm that old yet) who preferred the type of "real man" you describe--and no, she wasn't the woman who lasered off her pubes. I think that most people want a caring, give-and-take relationship, where they and their views are respected. I would also suggest reconsidering your view of "chivalry." Despite media portrayal, chivalry isn't opening doors (I would say that's good manners, but not something that you have to do--much like putting your napkin in your lap). Chivalry also has a great deal to do with generosity and courtesy--such as the generously accepting your partner as he/she is, and courteously listening to and trying to understand any reservations they may have about shaving (this extends way beyond shaving too). A Requirement for Oral Sex While I understand that you may not like "licking pubes," I'd like to remind everyone that trimmed/natural pubic hair actually creates a microbiologically cleaner environment for your licking pleasure--for both men AND women. Also, I would NEVER presume to give my partner an ultimatum about his body and say that I would only give him head if he shaved. NEVER. It's his body, and I respect his choices--just as he respects mine. Also, because many women can only ****** from oral sex, I think that choosing to be with-holding because you don't like her grooming habits while you have vaginal intercourse on a regular basis (which most women CAN'T ****** from while most men CAN) is extremely selfish and controlling. I have to admit that if I were with a guy who gave me such an ultimatum, I would dump his sorry ass immediately. I wouldn't want any guy who would go down on me so grudgingly to be anywhere near there. I'd say screw it, dump him, and find a nice vibrator until I found a man who cared about my pleasure as well as my boundaries, and I'd hope that if I were as controlling with my partner's body, that he would dump me too! Sex is about loving and appreciating your partner as they are--and having fun doing it! When rules and tit for tat rather than respect, courtesy, generosity, and affection become the name of the game the sex would probably suck anyway.

FIANCEE.

I love you 200, You said it 10x better than I would have. Not to mention... "I have to admit that if I were with a guy who gave me such an ultimatum, I would dump his sorry ass immediately"

Friggen...202, stupid editing limit -now the other half of my comment the stupid website ate before I tried to edit it at all- It's sad that women have to change their bodies to be considered sexually attractive, while men are considered fine as is, even with marginal hygiene practices. Also, why in the world would someone shave before a gyno appointment? It's a bad plan to alter the status quo of your ****** before having it examined. It would be like chugging purple koolaid before getting your tonsils examined.

HEY #2... wow. i didn't know someone could be so ******* stupid! girls do pretty much ALL the favors, in most sexual relationships. ********, handjobs, UNCOMFORTABLE SHAVING... and for you to say, "it would be nice to have the favour for you once in a while" that's what most girls are thinking. it WOULD be nice, once in a WHILE. can't think of any guy that should say that. and for the OP to say, she won't clean up for me. SHE DOESN'T HAVE TO! yeah, you might think of it as nice but she does a lot of other things she MIGHT not be willing to do. just think about it... (waxing hurts, shaving is uncomfortable. why don't you do her a favor? i bet you don't shave, if you do sorry for assuming. not shaving is actually cleaner.)

Well put BirdieKitKat.

i love all of the 5 paragraph essays everyone's writing. you guys must have a LOT of free time!!

i love all the 5-7 paragraph essays people are writing about topics that are completely irrelevant to the this particular FML. You guys must have a lot of time on your hands. hope you all proofread lol.

Are you SURE you're not in a third world country? Yes, it's nice having men decide what to do SOME OF THE TIME. Instead of coming up with something else though did it ever occur to you to ask her what she wanted to do? And once again, REAL men aren't judged by their ability to push others around. And no, most women DON'T want a puss that follows them around everywhere. I never said they did? Most want a guy who meets them halfway between your ideals of men. Talk about extremes. Ummm... if you don't KNOW the girl's age then wtf are you havin sex with her? :s I never said you didn't like a woman with personality. Just as long as that personality agrees with your own. And considering this ISN'T the middle east your views on how men should be sound very third world. No you didn't but you talk like you have experience in all these matters so I thought it was safe to assume. ;) Actually I was just talking about men in general-- if the sex is bad it's not cause your girl hasn't shaved. Well DUH. That's what all the girls (including me) have been saying: If you don't like her crotch then gtfo of the relationship, but DON'T expect her to shave just because you're unhappy with it.