Kids, Family and Health: It burns

It burns

By WTF - 16/03/2011 22:05

Today, after my 22-year-old son realized that there was no more contact solution, he decided to use tequila because he thought it would "kill the germs." We had to go to the hospital to have his eyes flushed out. I raised this moron. FML

I agree, your life sucks 47 531

You deserved it 12 564

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Same thing different taste

By redeye - 19/09/2011 05:03 - United States

Today, my younger brother decided it would be funny to put rubbing alcohol in my contact lens case while I had them soaking overnight. I didn't realize this until I put the first one in. FML

I agree, your life sucks 40 681

You deserved it 2 459

By Anonymous - 09/04/2012 22:32 - United States - Fredericksburg

Today, I had to pick my 22-year-old son up from the hospital, after he got blind drunk, got his hand stuck in a Pringles can, and got the bright idea of staggering to the local ER to get it cut off. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 617

You deserved it 3 008

By afather - 14/06/2015 13:41 - United States - Worthing

Today, I had to take my son to the hospital for drinking sunscreen. Apparently, he saw something on the internet that said if he drank it, his body would sweat it out and continually apply it to his body. He's 16. FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 398

You deserved it 6 532

By Anonymous - 28/12/2010 21:47 - United States

Today, my brother thought it would be hilarious to put vinegar in my contact solution. I took my contacts out hours ago and my eyes still burn. FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 488

You deserved it 2 626

By Anonymous - 27/04/2019 04:00

Today, my moron of a teenager drank lube to lubricate his throat during a coughing fit, thinking it would take away the itchiness in his throat. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 217

You deserved it 402

By don'tdrinkthat - 03/11/2013 22:27 - United States - Quincy

Today, I came home to find my 14-year-old son attempting to get drunk off aftershave. FML

I agree, your life sucks 44 267

You deserved it 4 825

By anon - 20/06/2014 05:06 - United States - Kennett

Today, I woke up and put my contacts in. It appears that I got drunk enough last night that instead of soaking my contacts in contact solution, I used mouthwash. FML

I agree, your life sucks 45 345

You deserved it 24 742

By badmom - 25/02/2012 11:25 - Ireland

Today, my 18-year old son decided to run his hand over our wooden fence to try and get a splinter, as he "forgot what they felt like." Last month, he stabbed himself in the arm with a sewing needle because he "forgot what an injection feels like." I raised this idiot. FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 106

You deserved it 8 667

Big brained

By TiredTeacher95 - 22/01/2022 19:59

Today, I had to call poison control on one of my students, because they decided to drink a half a bottle of hand sanitizer. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 201

You deserved it 99

By Anonymous - 13/10/2014 00:38 - United States - Racine

Today, my son drank a bottle of hot sauce. It wasn't a dare, he actually thought that it would give him a fever so that he could skip school tomorrow. This idiot is 15 years old. FML

I agree, your life sucks 41 015

You deserved it 5 174

perdix 29

Thursday 17 March 2011 8:16

I hope you did the Pee Wee Herman Tequila dance in the ER waiting room. That woulda showed him.

truehitman2010 0

Thursday 17 March 2011 8:31

idiot everyone knows your suppost to use vodka

Comments

AvengedSevenfold_fml_fml 12

Thursday 17 March 2011 12:52

What I don't understand is how he got both contacts in before realizing that it burned... >.>

IndigoFuckYou 9

Friday 18 March 2011 5:11

Well thought out. And, for the record, Avenged Sevenfold is amazing.

Capt_Oblivious 10

Thursday 17 March 2011 13:05

When is nature finally going to get around to skimming the 'junk' out of the gene pool?

purple_sarah88 0

Thursday 17 March 2011 13:59

Yes spamming your misspelled comment makes it valid! You're old enough to understand sarcasm right?

psikosis 0

Thursday 17 March 2011 14:01

I guess this gives an entirely new meaning for Tequilla Sunrise

NoraT_fml 6

Thursday 17 March 2011 14:12

your son is a bright shiny star :)

Iknoweverything 29

Thursday 17 March 2011 14:34

What a waste of alcohol. *sigh*

takemewithy0u 0

Thursday 17 March 2011 14:40

What a mom... what a mom! You're right, you raised him... so who's the real moron here?

yourmurderscenex 13

Thursday 17 March 2011 19:39

hey, idiot.. how is it his mom's fault he did something like that? i bet you did some stupid crap that your mom didn't raise you to do. hmm? i know i have. i don't think my mom my mom told me that taking more sleeping pills will make it work faster... i think i thought of that all on my own. so you need to stfu. thank you :) (i had my wisdom teeth removed and i was having an allergic reaction to my medicine so i thought "hey let me take like five sleeping pills so i can just sleep through this pain! the more i take the faster it will work." im not suicidal, just clearing that up.)