Health: Today, I woke up and put my contacts in. It appears that I got...

By anon - 20/06/2014 05:06 - United States - Kennett

Today, I woke up and put my contacts in. It appears that I got drunk enough last night that instead of soaking my contacts in contact solution, I used mouthwash. FML

I agree, your life sucks 45 345

You deserved it 24 742

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Same thing different taste

By kiriakousauce21 - 15/02/2010 07:44 - France

Today, I woke up thinking after wearing glasses and contacts all my life that I had miraculously been corrected to 20/20. Turns out I had just fallen asleep with my contacts in. FML

I agree, your life sucks 11 860

You deserved it 32 850

By KBO - 08/06/2009 06:54 - Australia

Today, I woke up hungover and thirsty, I found a glass of water next to the sink, filled it up with more water, chugged it and went back to bed. I woke up an hour later to my best friend telling me she thought she lost her contacts. They were in a glass next to the sink. I ate her contacts. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 068

You deserved it 43 446

Don't try this at home

By Lunar-Spice - 07/11/2020 08:01

Today, I found out what it feels like to put in a contact while drunk. My eye still hurts. FML

I agree, your life sucks 271

You deserved it 815

By redeye - 19/09/2011 05:03 - United States

Today, my younger brother decided it would be funny to put rubbing alcohol in my contact lens case while I had them soaking overnight. I didn't realize this until I put the first one in. FML

I agree, your life sucks 40 681

You deserved it 2 459

Rushed

By K.Trinity - 15/06/2024 20:00 - Australia - Perth

Today, I was in a rush to get to work and decided to multitask by making my coffee while brushing my teeth. Halfway through, I absentmindedly poured mouthwash into my coffee mug and took a big gulp. I spent the rest of the morning trying to get the taste of minty coffee out of my mouth. FML

I agree, your life sucks 127

You deserved it 444

Morning pick-me-up

By Anonymous - 30/01/2011 05:05 - United States

Today, upon waking up, I took a sip on what I thought was a cup of water on my nightstand. I quickly discovered it was my roommate's cup of used mouthwash which she was too lazy to throw out the night before. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 965

You deserved it 8 665

Oh gosh

By Anonymous - 16/02/2020 14:00

Today, I noticed a strange mark on the inside of my mouthwash bottle. As I was bending down to investigate, my hands tightened around the bottle and mouthwash squirted in my eye. It still burns. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 404

You deserved it 690

By halfasleep - 27/03/2012 14:00 - United States - New Haven

Today, I accidentally took my mouthwash like a shot. I don't know what burned more, when it went down or when it came back up. FML

I agree, your life sucks 21 680

You deserved it 14 681

Party hard

By jagerbombs - 30/12/2009 19:08 - United States

Today, I woke up at a stranger's house after a long night of drinking. Before leaving, I decided to steal some mouthwash so I didn't smell like a liquor store. Thinking of the night before, I instinctively downed the Listerine like a shot and puked everywhere. FML

I agree, your life sucks 7 027

You deserved it 46 455

By Anonymous - 28/12/2010 21:47 - United States

Today, my brother thought it would be hilarious to put vinegar in my contact solution. I took my contacts out hours ago and my eyes still burn. FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 488

You deserved it 2 626

mistertbawk420 10

Friday 20 June 2014 16:56

Minty fresh

silvercamaro 22

Friday 20 June 2014 17:00

At least you still have decent enough eyesight to post this on FML

Comments

musicforhearts 15

Friday 20 June 2014 16:56

That must have hurt! FYL

illegalbeagle69 23

Friday 20 June 2014 17:02

No shit.

mistertbawk420 10

Friday 20 June 2014 17:03

Mouthwash in the eyes doesn't tickle? My life is a lie...

cryssycakesx3 22

Friday 20 June 2014 17:44

the burn means it's working!

dragonkisses28 25

Friday 20 June 2014 20:24

I sincerely hope that you didn't forget to floss your eyebrows.

juststephhere 23

Friday 20 June 2014 20:48

My eyes are on fire... That would be excruciating!

Kamon97 23

Friday 20 June 2014 22:55

Could've been worse OP could've put them in Listerine. That shit is like acid ._.

TheDog6 24

Friday 20 June 2014 23:15

Nope not at all

tiernang 21

Saturday 21 June 2014 5:30

Understatement of the year.

mistertbawk420 10

Friday 20 June 2014 16:56

Minty fresh

nellbell414 13

Friday 20 June 2014 17:20

She'll be ready for any butterfly kisses

silvercamaro 22

Friday 20 June 2014 17:00

At least you still have decent enough eyesight to post this on FML

cakefete2 30

Friday 20 June 2014 19:01

False, speech to text at its finest.

flashback.miss 28

Friday 20 June 2014 17:00

yikes, hopefully your eyes are better with some TLC

MrConcise 34

Friday 20 June 2014 17:04

Why is your profile picture of OP's eye?

mistertbawk420 10

Friday 20 June 2014 17:19

I see no lyrics in that comment

nellbell414 13

Friday 20 June 2014 17:35

Eww wtf is your profile picture!?

AlwaysWatching 27

Friday 20 June 2014 18:07

So many people have asked that

mageepaigeee44 15

Friday 20 June 2014 22:44

Pretty sure it's a leach on an eye.

foxwasalamb 24

Friday 20 June 2014 22:46

or blood

trsshup 8

Friday 20 June 2014 22:46

i read this as "hope your eyes get better with some Thc"

GraceyBlueEyes 13

Friday 20 June 2014 23:01

or jam. If I remember the last times this was discussed.

mageepaigeee44 15

Friday 20 June 2014 23:32

Yea actually it does look like jam.

jad0016 12

Friday 20 June 2014 17:00

Well at least you know your eyes are clean now

91hayek 31

Friday 20 June 2014 17:17

How dirty are eyes to begin with?

jad0016 12

Friday 20 June 2014 17:22

depends on what you look at

ohSNAPyall 26

Friday 20 June 2014 18:05

Dirty eyes? Clean them up! With Orbit.

qwertsarecool122 23

Friday 20 June 2014 17:00

Way to start the morning out fresh!

illegalbeagle69 23

Friday 20 June 2014 17:04

Ya gotta fight gingivitis somehow! And don't forget to brush your teeth to prevent that horrible gum disease glaucoma.

KoalaBek 23

Friday 20 June 2014 17:06

You're lucky you can still see- I know a lad who drunkenly put his in a hair wax lid with water in, put them in the next morning and went completely blind for almost a week.