Sex and Intimacy: Let down - FML

Let down

By anonymous - 21/06/2009 02:00 - United States

Spicy

Today, I took my girlfriend's virginity. A few minutes in she remarked, "If this is what sex is normally like then I'm seriously disappointed." FML

I agree, your life sucks 63 229

You deserved it 17 261

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Same thing different taste

By Anonymous - 02/05/2015 02:22 - United States - San Francisco

Today, I lost my virginity to the girl of my dreams. I could tell she really enjoyed it, because she muttered "Well, that was disappointing." afterwards, then got dressed, said she'd made a huge mistake, and asked me not to call her again. Yep, total stud. FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 013

You deserved it 4 134

By sadsexer23 - 16/02/2010 03:10 - United States

Spicy

Today, I took my girlfriends virginity and had given it my all. When I had finished, sweating and tired, I looked down at her and smiled, obviously pleased with myself. She looked up at me and said, "Wait, was that it?" FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 828

You deserved it 6 735

No good

By :(( - 28/09/2013 21:24 - Australia - Brisbane

Spicy

Today, I was all set to lose my virginity to my girlfriend. I was ecstatic, until she threatened to "beat the fuck" out of me if I didn't make it good for her. The actual sex was 30 seconds of me being given death glares, causing me to lose my boner, and have to leave in shame. FML

I agree, your life sucks 69 435

You deserved it 8 032

By Lady Vulva - 19/09/2015 02:56

Spicy

Today, I lost my virginity to my boyfriend. It lasted about 20 seconds, and he cried during it. I later heard him telling his friends he'd given me a "damn good pounding" and "made her cum 3 times". I wish. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 974

You deserved it 3 072

By fuck you, Odin, FUCK YOU - 03/03/2014 22:35 - United States - Los Angeles

Spicy

Today, I was finally all set to lose my virginity. My girlfriend pushed me onto the bed and pulled off my underwear. She then made a face as if she'd just sucked on a lemon, and got up and left without a word. I haven't heard from her since. FML

I agree, your life sucks 71 320

You deserved it 9 621

By notsohappy - 18/02/2009 21:14 - United States

Spicy

Today, was the first time I had sex with a guy I really like. I took off my shirt and my bra and he said "wow, that's disappointing." FML

I agree, your life sucks 118 914

You deserved it 11 084

By sexisntfun - 30/03/2015 02:13 - United States

Spicy

Today, I was about to lose my virginity to my girlfriend, with whom I am genuinely in love. Right after I'd got the condom on, she said, "You do know this is break-up sex, right?" FML

I agree, your life sucks 42 316

You deserved it 3 184

By Anon. - 01/03/2011 23:51 - United States

Spicy

Today, my girlfriend thought it would be sexy to stick her finger up my ass during sex. I screamed like a little girl and barely managed to finish. Afterward, she said, 'Now you know how it feels.' FML

I agree, your life sucks 20 613

You deserved it 91 019

By Perdito_Coño - 05/09/2014 20:55 - Australia - Quakers Hill

Spicy

Today, I was about to lose my virginity to my girlfriend. Unfortunately, she started fake-moaning like a pornstar before I even entered her, totally killing the mood and my boner. She swore she hadn't moaned, accused me of not finding her attractive enough, and angrily left. FML

I agree, your life sucks 46 752

You deserved it 7 616

Nuts

By Anonymous - 15/09/2011 20:03 - United States

Spicy

Today, I lost my virginity to my boyfriend. Not only did he last just 2 minutes, he also sat there for a while afterwards, smacking his semi-erect penis in awe and saying, "Look, it's still hard! How crazy is that?!" FML

I agree, your life sucks 41 874

You deserved it 6 151

Next

Top comments

ohhhhshizzz 0

Sunday 21 June 2009 9:30

Well sex isn't always good for the first time you have to know what to do. Play with the clit:] Lmao, seriously you have to do all those things for the GIRL to get the ******. Good thing she was blunt

DeafChef 0

Sunday 21 June 2009 10:20

you didn't take her virginity. she gave it to you.

Comments

Grrrl 0

Tuesday 30 June 2009 14:43

To keep yourself from sounding like a total rapist, how about you don't use the phrase "took her virginity"

deathkeeper666 0

Tuesday 30 June 2009 21:23

i am sorry but thats sad i bet i could do a better job than you

truthbetoldxx 0

Wednesday 1 July 2009 0:24

The first time can be pretty painful for girls. It wasn't you...well, maybe it was, but most likely it was just 'cause of that.

michelleebabyy05 0

Thursday 2 July 2009 0:42

well the first time doesnt allways feel good . but that sucks .

ThisisAlicia 0

Thursday 2 July 2009 2:19

My first time was terrible, and he was extremely experienced. I guess it depends if she's into it or not. No biggie.

potprincess 0

Thursday 2 July 2009 23:32

wtf. either you have a tiny ass dick... or she's loose as a wizards sleeve.

jwheel 0

Monday 6 July 2009 7:25

I defs understand where she's coming from.

nikshy2329 0

Tuesday 7 July 2009 18:23

hahahahahahahahahaha! sorry, that was mean, but that's still kinda funny

s1819f 0

Wednesday 8 July 2009 7:21

don't worry. sex is not that great for the girl the first time. you spend your life convinced that sex is some magical experience, but then the first time lets you down. you will get better as you guys keep practicing it and she will like it more

Baby_Baby_BABY 0

Thursday 9 July 2009 14:57

I just laughed out loud at this reply. But yeah, FYL to this guy for sucking in bed

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The Top

Today, I was having sex with my boyfriend. I was in the middle of an intense orgasm when we heard the panicky voice of his little sister saying there was an emergency downstairs. He jumped up and left to see what the matter was. The big emergency? The Wii remotes had dead batteries. FML

I agree, your life sucks 59 167

You deserved it 9 445

Today, while leaving a job site, I put a bundle of pipe on my boss's van, picked up a few tools, and left for the day. He called screaming 30 minutes later to inform me that I didn't strap the pipe to the rack. It slid off the van and hit the car in front of him. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 087

You deserved it 4 872

The Top

Today, I was walking through town when I saw a plastic bag on the ground. Trying to be a good citizen, I picked it up, intending on throwing it in the trash. When I looked up, there wasn't a trash can for another hundred feet. So I put it back down. Now I've got a $200 fine to pay for littering. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 003

You deserved it 61 049

Today, I saw my boyfriend spitting the mouthwash back into the bottle, because, "this stuff is really expensive." FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 345

You deserved it 2 606

Today, my boss asked about the mass of deep scratches on my arm. I lied and told him it happened while I was trying to save my cat from a tree. Truth is, my cat is a sadistic asshole who stalks me and mauls me whenever he can. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 369

You deserved it 5 891

Today, I was going to end a thing I had with this guy. It turned out that he got back together with his ex-girlfriend and was just using me as a back up. FML

I agree, your life sucks 23 095

You deserved it 4 108

Today, I learned that, when choking on a piece of food, you can cough hard enough to partially prolapse a hemorrhoid. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 772

You deserved it 2 548

Today, my roommate's parents came over to our one room apartment. They found condom wrappers. My roommate tried to say they were mine. I'm still a virgin. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 384

You deserved it 277