Ouch

By Anonymous - 03/01/2012 23:07 - United States

Spicy
Today, I was diagnosed with a clogged milk gland. I am not, nor have ever been, pregnant and therefore have also never breastfed. This condition is caused by my boyfriend's over-active urge to suck on my nipples. I'm in horrible pain, and he won't stop laughing. FML
I agree, your life sucks 38 932
You deserved it 6 294
Winter: Snow and Funny News
Snuggle up and laugh with our winter stories, where snow isn't the only thing sliding around! More…
Previous FML Next FML

Same thing different taste

Next

Top comments

FortuneCookie3 1

maybe he could suck the blockage out.

242 13

Comments

onorexveritas 23

LMFAO @#1 but forrilz...thasux

0 8
iDaniel525 8

LMAFO at your spelling. But, for real...spell correctly.

3 0
underguarded 20

Wow, You and the other 99% of guys who have sex with their girlfriends. You have won nothing.

14 1
DocBastard 38

Cookiemonster - my Virgin Detector is screaming right now. You're 14 and your username is "cookiemonster". Yeah, I'm not buying it. Sorry, champ.

22 0
MissMae93 23

DocBastard strikes down yet another wee little virgin. Well done, god sir.

5 0
katt_is_here 24

Rosy Palm doesn't count. You are still a virgin.

7 0
foreverjoseph 5

Hmmmmm.....not feeling it young one. Good luck with this lying thing you've got going though. Doesn't seem to be working well, but good luck.

2 0
Tdevonner 0

amber cole much?...i think the thread got hijacked...ps: I love u doc...i wanna have ur bastard child...

1 1
heyred 11

To each her own, but I cannot fathom why you'd let him suck that hard. That cannot be pleasurable for you, unless you enjoy pain. Guys wouldn't allow their dicks to be sucked like that - it hurts! Your boyfriend sounds like a tool.

19 1
Ozone1232 5

I find this easy to ********** to.

6 9
astralvagan 20

I find you're a douche bag

10 2
Tdevonner 0

I found myself jolted back to reality from my...err...session I didnt realise I was having til I read 98

0 1
perdix 29

Why does the OP remind me of Larry Craig? "I'm not gay, nor have I even been gay." For some weird reason, I'd like to suck her **** in the Minneapolis airport. Is it just me?

8 2
kingsley_fml 8

So much bathroom humor, yeesh.

4 0
kingsley_fml 8

Comment 69! Score! I'm as happy as a little girl.

5 0
perdix 29

I wondered what ever happened to Dieter.

0 0
pdp_fml 21

It's the same situation that they used to have prior to refrigeration and Baby formula. The women were called wet nurses and would breast feed infants for mothers who didn't want to or couldn't produce enough milk themselves. Too bad your breasts had a blockage. The Dr gave you some medication for your condition?

2 0
kitkatmeOw 8

That must've sucked the fun out of your day to find out :P

2 1
underguarded 20

I had no idea this could happen. I can feel my nipples shriveling up inside my body.

8 1
underguarded 20

*Retreating Is what I originally intended to write. Nipples don't shrivel. They retreat into protection.

4 0