Health: Ouch

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Ouch

By Anonymous - 03/01/2012 23:07 - United States

Today, I was diagnosed with a clogged milk gland. I am not, nor have ever been, pregnant and therefore have also never breastfed. This condition is caused by my boyfriend's over-active urge to suck on my nipples. I'm in horrible pain, and he won't stop laughing. FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 946

You deserved it 6 299

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Same thing different taste

By Indianagirl94 - 29/10/2012 22:22 - United States

Today, I was woken up by my husband attempting to breastfeed off my lactating nipples. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 730

You deserved it 3 396

By Anonymous - 14/09/2011 16:34 - United States

Today, I went to my gyn to see what a painful lump is under my armpit. Turns out it's breast tissue, and yes, it will fill up with milk when I'm pregnant. I essentially have three boobs. FML

I agree, your life sucks 40 429

You deserved it 2 850

By Scott - 15/09/2011 07:34 - United States

Today, I caught my pregnant wife trying to suck milk from her breasts. FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 304

You deserved it 6 424

By notyourmummy - 12/11/2015 09:09 - United Kingdom - Ryde

Today, my boyfriend started to suck on my boob, which I quite enjoy, until he said he was breastfeeding and called me "Mummy". I don't think I can ever let his mouth near my boobs ever again. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 138

You deserved it 3 449

By milkysubstance - 14/03/2017 05:00 - Australia - Brisbane

Today, I went to the doctor's to find out why I was producing small amounts of milky liquid from my nipples, even though I'm not pregnant. When she asked me to show her, I squirted on her shirt. FML

I agree, your life sucks 5 144

You deserved it 499

By ananomus - 22/08/2010 04:26 - United States

Today, my boyfriend started to kiss my boobs. I am pregnant and started my lactation period. Now every time he looks at me he calls me milky way. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 239

You deserved it 5 931

It's a sign!

By unknown951 - This FML is from back in 2010 but it's good stuff

Today, I went to the doctor because recently I've had a white liquid coming from my breast. I found out it's milk. I'm not pregnant. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 032

You deserved it 4 828

By sunny_ca559 - 03/03/2010 01:03 - United States

Today, my husband admitted to me that he has a mental block about touching my boobs, because he's afraid that breast milk is going to spurt out at him. I had my son 5 months ago and I don't breast feed. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 637

You deserved it 4 130

By omgboobs - 23/12/2009 02:34 - United States

Today, my boyfriend told me that when my nipples are hard, he thinks that they look like giant zits, and when he squeezes them, he imagines them popping pus. He then reached for my chest. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 970

You deserved it 2 785

Dodge that bullet

By e11ie - 27/09/2009 20:57 - United States

Today, while my boyfriend and I were cuddling on the couch, he looked down at my chest and said, "I can't wait for the day that these produce milk." We've only been dating a few months, and I have no intention of lactating anytime soon. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 044

You deserved it 3 131

ClassyCommando 13

Wednesday 4 January 2012 8:17

Calcium gives him strong boners.

FortuneCookie3 1

Wednesday 4 January 2012 8:17

maybe he could suck the blockage out.

Comments

geod69 8

Wednesday 4 January 2012 18:27

Guess lunch was good

hateevryone 14

Wednesday 4 January 2012 18:41

sock him in the jaw, cause it's his fault.

Calyx_fml 21

Wednesday 4 January 2012 19:32

POIDH

brun12 1

Wednesday 4 January 2012 19:40

That sucks. I've breastfed 2 babies and have never had that problem. Sorry op!

millionz4184 2

Wednesday 4 January 2012 20:01

I like sucking nipples too! Yum num num num!

Track1991 0

Wednesday 4 January 2012 21:59

Wooow I wouldn't know what to be mad at most: the pain or your boyfriend. Beat his ass for laughing.

IntenseGas 0

Wednesday 4 January 2012 22:18

( o Y x )

KiddNYC1O 20

Wednesday 4 January 2012 22:24

That's awesome.

THE_A_TEEN 27

Wednesday 4 January 2012 22:48

Shaddup you wanker. You should read more FML's or at least read the intimacy section then bitch your stupid rant...

KiddNYC1O 20

Wednesday 4 January 2012 22:50

144- Welcome to FML. Now, silence!

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Ouch

Same thing different taste

It's a sign!

Dodge that bullet

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