Prissy

By Anonymous - 29/07/2009 16:46 - United States

Spicy
Today, my wife found out my son masturbated and wanted to send him to counseling. Thinking she was overreacting, I told her I masturbated when I was a teen so he should turn out like me. She began sobbing uncontrollably. FML
I agree, your life sucks 68 582
You deserved it 7 282

Same thing different taste

Top comments

sportmaster525 0

wow that is one super conservative wife

blah123blah 0

Comments

spank the monky????? its called jacking off.... or whatever but plz never again.....lol

if he is over 11 years old it's perfectly normal for him to **********. 98% of guys do

I mean, it's normal otherwise, too! Many kids find out about masturbation completely by accident, boys and girls. Some as early as toddlers!

My younger cousin masturbated once when I was changing his diaper.. he's 2. XD

dramakat11 0

I agree. It's healthy to touch oneself at any age. I touched myself as far back as I can remember. Even before I had the ability to ****** it still felt good. One time my great grandmother walked in on me when I was like 3 and yelled at me. I feel so sorry for previous generations who actually believe(d) there is something wrong with masturbation. Did you know that until the 1890s or so it was considered a mental disorder for women to feel sexual desire? What a ******* crock. I'm glad to see no one on here is a crazy puritan.

While I think it's perfectly normal and natural to **********, when young children ********** it's often a sign of and in response to some sort of sexual abuse. It's not always the case, but that's one of the signs most therapists, parents, etc. look for when determining whether or not a child has been abused.

Well, I think that thinking might be reversed. For example, therapists will most likely not be like, "Oh, your child masturbates? Maybe he/she was sexually abused," but rather, "Oh, you think your child has been sexually abused? Well, does he/she **********?"

Send your wife to counselling, she needs it.

lwdjaymac 1

Sounds like the wife is the one who needs counselling

FYL for having a wife that thinks teenage boys masturbating is a bad thing.

Wtf?? Almost every teenager masturbates! And the rest are having real sex

fretforyerlatte 0
Autumnatic 0

ok did you have to make that comment like 10 times on this page? there's nothing wrong with you not doing it but what, are you THAT proud of yourself that you have to tell everyone 10 times?

Agree with 302. It's quite annoying. Chfanfiction, it kind of seems like you're in denial: you keep repeating yourself, as it seems, so that what you're saying becomes the truth. Though if you're THAT interested in abstinence from masturbation, you should probably go seek out a specialized forum for -that-, and not continuously post about it on here. EDIT: I just realized that I'm posting on a three year old topic. Oh well! Enjoy.

ImFree17 0

Wow that is stupid! Really now. You shoulda wacked her over the head and called her a dumb bitch then went up to your son and told him that it's good for him. Blue balls = no good. Imma girl but I know. I have 5 brothers.

lolololcheese 0

I don't see how "ladies" should have any different opinions on this than guys.

wowfmlife 0

Everyone saying that everyone masturbates, even women, is wrong. I'm a woman and I never have and I never will. That's disgusting and immoral. Never

Uh... huh. Immoral? I still don't get that argument.

When you have conservative religion truths just get in the way.

monnanon 13

Ok saying everyone is a very broad statement but most people do, if you don't then fair play to you thats your choice. Just out of my own curiosity tho, why do you think it is immoral?

dg72592_fml 0

haha you have no idea what you're missing out on boo fingering yourself feels great & guys love it.

liveitlearnit 0

You're in the minority, miss. I've been doing it all my life and I don't think God would think any less of me.

I don't understand how it is immoral. Would you prefer he go out and **** everything that moves?? Or would you prefer him to have absolutely no sexual drive whatsoever? If the first, that is immoral. If the second, you need to enter the real world with everyone else and realize everyone has a sex drive and sometimes people release in this way, which is better than going out and just ******* anything.

Yeah, for some reason I don't believe you. Everyone, from children to senior citizens, male and female masturbates. It's natural, normal and and perfectly morally acceptable. Lying, however, is morally wrong.

I don't do it and I'm not gonna lie, no one knows me this in the internet, there's no point. but I wouldn't go so far as to call it "immoral" what people do is their own choice and they can do what they like as long as they're not interfering with other people. I don't see how masturbating is "immoral" as long as you do it in private.

Immoral? What? I mean if you have beliefs and stuff fine, but how the hell is it immoral? Unless you're being extremely literal in your definition. But still...

I've never "masturbated" either, but I'm not some crazy bitch who thinks it's "immoral" How the **** is it immoral? You know, a lot of guys cum in the middle of the night. Is what they can't help immoral too? There is absolutely nothing wrong with masturbation... unless you're the kind that, as mentioned before, does it nonstop. PS - quotes because... as children, people are prone to touch themselves out of curiosity. In the context I'm using, though, I mean that I've never intentionally done it.

wowfmlife, Onan's sin wasn't spilling his seed on the ground (masturbating), it is that he did it to avoid impregnating his dead brother's widow. There was a law in those days where if a man's brother died before having children, he was supposed to marry her and have children for the sake of inheritance. Now that we have straightened out your misinterpreation of Scripture, go diddle yourself and have some fun.

fatass123 0

#69- Guys love fingering themselves?

Let me make something very clear to you. Sex drive has existed for hundreds of millions of years. Human nature has existed for hundreds of thousands of years. Religion has only existed for tens of thousands of years. Which do you think has the most profound effect on a normal human being? Answer: The one that's been here the longest.

#55 - There are no words for how pathetic you are. People with the level of contempt for human sexuality that you possess make me sick - mostly because the majority of folks who hold opinions like you are far-right fundamentalist Christians who take the Bible 100% literally.

Ligerie 0

Isn't there that whole " rather your seed in the belly of ***** than spilled on the floor" thing? I mean I'm not religious so I could be wrong, but to some people masturbating is immoral. which is sad cuz masturbating is great.

I honestly don't understand this "immoral" argument. Grow the **** up. how is it "immoral" to satisfy natural human urges? we're mammals, that's all we are, we're animals with animalistic sexual urges that we naturally fulfil by masturbation or sex. You denying yourself this pleasure is whats unnatural, idiot.

dramakat11 0

Scripture makes a case against men masturbating...but why is it immoral for a woman to do it? She has no seed to spill

Lemme guess; you're a bible humper. First and foremost it's perfectly normal and healthy. A lot of young children even **********. Either way the bible only talks about wasting seed. So it only condemns male masturbation. So you have a choice have fun with your sexual insecurities or with your hand.