Sex, Embarrassing, Awkward and Intimacy: Surprised indeed

Surprised indeed

By fredo - 19/03/2013 12:31 - United States - Ames

Today, I walked into the room naked while my wife was on the computer to surprise her. She smiled, put down her laptop and left for the bathroom so I started jerking it in anticipation. It was really feeling good until my wife's best friend, who was on Skype, started giggling. FML

I agree, your life sucks 54 064

You deserved it 24 113

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Same thing different taste

By Anonymous - 13/12/2009 08:39 - United States

Today, I came home and saw my girlfriend on the computer. I decided to sex things up and sneak up on her naked from behind. Apparently, she was video-chatting with her friends at the time. They saw everything. FML

I agree, your life sucks 8 961

You deserved it 25 333

My little buddy

By Anonymous - 18/08/2009 05:37 - United States

Today, I walked in on my husband in our room completely naked. At first I thought he was waiting for me so we could have sex. He hadn't seen me yet, so I started to undress too to surprise him. Then I saw that he had drawn a face on his penis and he was talking to it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 80 116

You deserved it 6 511

By Hard in flip flops - 21/01/2018 06:00

Today, my dad walked in on me jerking off. It wouldn’t have been so bad if I wasn’t Skyping my boyfriend, while both of us were totally naked. I had just told him to “put those toes in your mouth and I’ll cum like you’ve never seen before”. FML

I agree, your life sucks 5 910

You deserved it 4 747

By Isabell - 06/02/2010 05:31 - Australia

Today, my soon-to-be mother-in-law walked in on me masturbating, in my own house. FML

I agree, your life sucks 23 770

You deserved it 5 870

By Gordon - 22/07/2009 14:12 - United States

Today, I was standing by the bed naked, waiting for my wife to come out of the bathroom. She opens the door and walks over to me, swinging her hips, wearing pratically nothing. About four feet from me, she trips on the edge of the floor mat, and uses my 'junk' to catch herself. FML

I agree, your life sucks 82 702

You deserved it 6 765

Deez nutz hurtz

By Anonymous - 11/03/2020 15:01

Today, I was about to have sex with my wife, so I walked into our room naked, but then whacked myself in the nuts with the door handle as I attempted to close it. She can't stop laughing, and I can't sit down. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 084

You deserved it 523

A heads up next time maybe?

By Bob - 07/04/2020 02:00

Today, when my girlfriend walked out the room, for a laugh, I covered my whole body except my knob in blankets. Then when I heard her come back in, I yelled, "Surprise!" It was her mom, who'd dropped by unannounced. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 692

You deserved it 1 018

By Cynical - 30/03/2009 03:49 - United States

Today, I was in my room with the door locked and my mom knocked on the door. I said "don't come in, i'm naked!" She said "That's okay!" so she unlocked the door and walked in. I was masturbating. FML

I agree, your life sucks 95 208

You deserved it 37 101

Self-service

By Steve - 13/06/2012 21:30 - United States - Lake Charles

Today, I walked in on my wife masturbating. Naturally, I asked her if she needed some help. She replied, "Nah, I've got this." FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 811

You deserved it 17 109

Sexy time

By Jssceli09 - 18/12/2009 08:25 - United States

Today, my boyfriend and I were using our Skype accounts for the first time. He went to the restroom and I thought that I'd surprise him with my clothes off for when he came back. I heard him walk back into the room so I got into position. It wasn't him. It was his mom. FML

I agree, your life sucks 9 653

You deserved it 25 011

DocBastard 38

Tuesday 19 March 2013 18:52

Well that'll make your next dinner party awkward. It's probably bad that she was giggling rather than gasping in awe.

thosedogtags 8

Tuesday 19 March 2013 18:53

Your wife is sneaky.. Although, I wouldn't want my best friend seeing my husbands junk... Maybe it's her way of wanting a threesome?! Get it son! (;

Comments

vbmg152 18

Wednesday 20 March 2013 3:14

YDI!

Lilo4life 26

Wednesday 20 March 2013 4:23

That'll make any future double dates awkward...

HeartOfLead 24

Wednesday 20 March 2013 4:31

Houston, wee have have a- err, a little problem.

Inked0803 12

Wednesday 20 March 2013 6:16

You totally deserved that though let's be real here no woman wants to sit there and watch a guy jack off

jsanchez89 5

Friday 22 March 2013 13:06

Girl on Skype did

AlexxC_fml 6

Wednesday 20 March 2013 8:09

well is the friend hot at least?

Fuzzynavel 10

Wednesday 20 March 2013 8:20

Wifes best friend catches you fapping? FINISH 'IM!

grandpuba 6

Wednesday 20 March 2013 8:24

She was giggling cause it wad so small

itsjusyme 11

Wednesday 20 March 2013 9:03

So what, go with it, sometimes in life you have to say FML and move on!

iamthunder 4

Wednesday 20 March 2013 17:06

Should of asked her if she wanted to have web cam sex!

iamthunder 4

Wednesday 20 March 2013 17:08

Should of looked her in the eyes and finish like a boss!

Keywords

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The Top

Today, I found out my husband’s former mistress is going to be at Thanksgiving dinner. Why? Because his idiot brother married the tramp AFTER the affair came to light. So now not only is the whore my sister-in-law, she’s being included in every family gathering henceforth. Fuck this family and… FML

I agree, your life sucks 596

You deserved it 183

Today, while eating dinner, my child picked up a piece of their chicken off the floor and put it in their mouth. It wasn’t until during bath time did I realize it wasn't chicken but poop that fell out of their diaper. FML

I agree, your life sucks 174

You deserved it 363

The Top

Today, my wife told me that she isn't in a place where she can have a physical relationship, that if I want us to have a physical relationship then we need to start from the bottom up, and work on building a friendship. I'm like, we've been married 15 years, and we're not even friends? FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 198

You deserved it 546

Today, I found out why you don't let your kids grab your arms while their hands are covered in glitter glue. Easy to get it on you, extremely painful to rip from your arm hairs. FML

I agree, your life sucks 24 301

You deserved it 5 695

Today, my boyfriend decided to come over and surprise me. When he got to my apartment and heard the shower running, he decided get in and join me. I was walking my dog, my mother is in town for the weekend. FML

I agree, your life sucks 47 109

You deserved it 4 459

Today, I found out that I have been studying for the wrong final exam. One more hour until the test. FML

I agree, your life sucks 21 721

You deserved it 36 776

Today, my girlfriend beat me at ping pong, twenty to three. She said I let her win because I don't respect her, then stormed out of the room. I'm just really bad at ping pong. FML

I agree, your life sucks 46 473

You deserved it 4 788

Today, I was playing a game of charades with my in-laws. I had to get them to guess the movie "Chicken Run," so I started flapping my arms, clucking loudly, and running around. I was really getting into it when I noticed everyone looking horrified. Turns out, my mother-in-law is terrified of chicken, and I just about triggered her a panic attack. FML

I agree, your life sucks 474

You deserved it 100