Birthday, Weird and Love: Thanks, I guess… - FML

Thanks, I guess…

By Anonymous - 21/09/2013 18:10 - United States

Today, it's my birthday. I don't mind crappy gifts, but I have to wonder why the hell my boyfriend bought me a home enema kit. FML

I agree, your life sucks 43 142

You deserved it 4 171

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Same thing different taste

By same - 21/11/2015 06:39 - United States - Palo Alto

Today, my boyfriend decided to gift me soap, a razor, and deodorant for my birthday. FML

I agree, your life sucks 22 802

You deserved it 6 879

By Birthday blues - 13/12/2018 22:00

Today, it's my birthday. I lit my birthday candles on the cake I made myself and blew them out alone, while my worthless husband sat on the couch stuffing Doritos in his face. My present? He sprayed Lysol in the bathroom after he took a dump. FML

I agree, your life sucks 4 038

You deserved it 602

By amber - 19/04/2012 18:00 - United States - Saint Paul

Today, my boyfriend gave me acne cream for my birthday. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 737

You deserved it 4 783

By random123 - 29/11/2009 05:16 - United States

Today, it was my birthday. My boyfriend was kind enough to give me prescription strength deodorant. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 164

You deserved it 7 761

It's all too much

By Anonymous - 23/06/2024 09:00 - United States

Today, it's my birthday. My gifts were a stomach bug from my kid and a confession to a year-long affair from my (now soon-to-be-ex) husband of 21 years. Nobody even got me a card. FML

I agree, your life sucks 642

You deserved it 100

Happy Nothing

By Cheapass - 07/11/2021 02:00

Today, it’s my birthday. My boyfriend didn’t get me a present, or do anything special for me, because, “The rent’s paid, you have a fridge full of groceries… What more do you want?” Later on, he asked me why did I, “look so sad?” FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 381

You deserved it 290

By Deaf Dumb & Blonde - 01/09/2016 21:17 - United States

Today, it's my birthday. I told my boyfriend I wanted to feel special even if for just one day. He said he would do the laundry for me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 14 534

You deserved it 2 214

By salt. - 28/02/2012 22:04 - United States

Today, it's my birthday. My fiancé decided to give me the gift of "freedom." That's how he put it, anyway. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 182

You deserved it 2 634

By reallyman__639 - 13/12/2011 12:26 - United States

Today, it's my birthday. My boyfriend took me to dinner and near the end, he pulled out a long, rectangular box. Thinking it was a necklace, I got very excited. It was a wand. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 563

You deserved it 17 509

By Mazzam - 19/11/2008 11:33 - France

Today, it's my birthday. My girlfriend gave me the present she'd bought for me. I said, joking, "I hope it's not a tie!" It was a tie. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 282

You deserved it 18 567

Next

Top comments

BreynHope 11

Sunday 22 September 2013 2:43

Nothing says happy birthday like a clean asshole. Take it all in stride.

BlesstheSilence 11

Sunday 22 September 2013 2:45

Swiggity swooty he's coming for that booty!

Comments

andreitaxx89 13

Sunday 22 September 2013 4:19

Maybe he thinks you're full of shit?

icepanda 6

Sunday 22 September 2013 4:20

that's just a horrible gift

pepsi_ftw 13

Sunday 22 September 2013 4:21

what is an enema kit?

brewmasterg 34

Sunday 22 September 2013 6:02

If you can type this, you can type it into google.

mattrd_fml 31

Sunday 22 September 2013 14:17

its a kit where you squirt liquid up your butt to clean you out.

pepsi_ftw 13

Sunday 22 September 2013 19:37

thanks

buckdharma 37

Sunday 22 September 2013 4:22

Maybe his money is tight and he's a little behind. (hint, hint.)

buffysummers 5

Sunday 22 September 2013 4:49

He wants anal!

hitemup789 4

Sunday 22 September 2013 4:51

Anal ******* tonight

willowfiasco 4

Sunday 22 September 2013 4:54

Is his birthday coming up?

seriously_wtf22 2

Sunday 22 September 2013 4:55

He wants to take you from behind

justlikeme79 9

Sunday 22 September 2013 4:56

Don't feel too bad. Today is my birthday too, and my boyfriend had to cancel our plans and then never even told me happy birthday. At least yours remembered.

gracehi 31

Sunday 22 September 2013 5:28

Waaaaah...

edmunson 22

Sunday 22 September 2013 6:22

Wtf kind of comparison was that??

NightHawk387 22

Sunday 22 September 2013 5:00

It's simple. He bought you an enema because he thinks your full of shit.

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You deserved it 12 238

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I agree, your life sucks 593

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I agree, your life sucks 19 316

You deserved it 40 791

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I agree, your life sucks 41 530

You deserved it 3 909

Today, my OCD reached a new high when I used a correction pen to white-out an eyelash which was photocopied onto every single page of my reading material. I did it because the eyelash was too distracting and I couldn't finish reading the article without the urge to rip it into shreds. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 206

You deserved it 5 358

Today, while getting a hernia exam, I accidentally ran my fingers through my doctor's hair. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 576

You deserved it 9 007