Work: Today, I caught a customer using his fat to shoplift gum out...

By nocat6 - 15/09/2014 03:07 - United States - Northville

Today, I caught a customer using his fat to shoplift gum out of a store. FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 161

You deserved it 3 066

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Same thing different taste

By disappointment son - 19/05/2017 12:00

Today, I caught and kicked a shoplifter out of my store. The shoplifter was my mom. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 487

You deserved it 248

By idiotson - 11/06/2014 00:39 - United States - Rocky Point

Today, I had to go to the police station after my son got arrested for shoplifting 15 packs of gum. He got away with it at first, but got busted when he tried to return it all because he "didn't like the flavor". FML

I agree, your life sucks 55 305

You deserved it 8 968

Snitched

By Anonymous - 10/02/2024 21:00

Today, I caught a grubby, evil-smelling, foul-mouthed woman blatantly shoplifting by stuffing electronics into her coat pockets, so I detained her and called the police. Less than an hour later I was fired. She was the shop owner's mother and “had permission” to just take stuff. FML

I agree, your life sucks 765

You deserved it 108

By Timmy - 26/01/2009 13:28 - France

Today, I got caught stealing lollies. I am 25. FML

I agree, your life sucks 8 484

You deserved it 59 477

Dumbass

By Anonymous - 21/11/2022 04:00

Today, my son is an idiot, but I tried to give him the benefit of the doubt by giving him a job as a cashier in one of my stores. Within half an hour, I was sent security footage from that store's manager showing my son on his phone, ignoring customers, picking his nose, and stealing money from the till. FML

I agree, your life sucks 985

You deserved it 439

By Retailhell - 22/12/2014 06:25 - United States

Today, since it's company policy, I had to go to the back of my small store to retrieve an item for a customer, even though I was working by myself. I came back to find that since she couldn't get into the cash register, she found and stole my purse instead. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 425

You deserved it 3 430

By bzygirl - 26/09/2009 21:23 - United States

Today, was my first day at my new job in a shop. 10 minutes after my first customer leaves I realize she managed to steal $200 worth of merchandise while she had me getting stuff for her from the back room. FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 004

You deserved it 7 828

Jedi mind trick

By Anonymous - 12/04/2018 19:00

Today, while covering lunch for the self-checkout host, I noticed a customer walking away. I smiled and said, "Have a nice night!" A few minutes later, I saw that she'd left without paying on her machine. I'd smiled and waved at a lady as she stole from me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 823

You deserved it 819

By wallets - 29/02/2012 07:47 - United States

Today, I told a customer that we don't do refunds. He responded by throwing his wallet at my face and accusing me of stealing it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 024

You deserved it 2 486

By anonynomi - 19/11/2015 17:26 - United States - San Francisco

Today, I was accused of shoplifting, after the alarm started beeping as I walked into the store. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 043

You deserved it 1 605

s3kShUn47 20

Monday 15 September 2014 11:49

Ay, you gotta find some sort of use for those rolls....

xlord 27

Monday 15 September 2014 11:55

I'm going to take a wild guess and say he tucked it into his fat folds.

Comments

NyQuilSausages 7

Monday 15 September 2014 17:10

eww lol

massie91 7

Monday 15 September 2014 17:16

its in no mans land now.....Hitler wouldn't touch that territory

worldclassrager 39

Monday 15 September 2014 17:47

I wonder what else he has hidden there

keiNan_fml 35

Monday 15 September 2014 17:56

there goes a gum belly

bayy1432 14

Monday 15 September 2014 18:05

at that point..Id let him keep it. that's gross lol.

FrankHotpants 31

Monday 15 September 2014 20:09

A read something about an obese man doing this in prison, he snuck a gun in but later confessed.

fairydust7 9

Monday 15 September 2014 20:35

I'd tell him he could keep it.

fader48080 10

Monday 15 September 2014 21:01

you know what... let him keep it.

Kitchen_Ninja 11

Monday 15 September 2014 21:04

Well that happened.

danilynn6308 14

Monday 15 September 2014 21:04

That guy knows how to make the best of his situation at least. Optimistic guy he is.

Keywords

Love Christmas Break-ups Miscellaneous Poopoo peepee Gross Ironic Argument Friends Awkward Haircut Cute Relatable You're fired Work Cars Covid Health Cheating Jealousy Parenting Kids Family DIY Cats Roommate Sex Am I overreacting? Intimacy Management

The Top

Today, I dyed my hair blue because I’m cosplaying as Jinx from Arcane. My parents made me practically homeless because they associate hair dye with "wokeness" and they’re not having that shit in their house. I'm now staying with my sister. FML

I agree, your life sucks 442

You deserved it 191

Today, I was on my way home from a friend's house. I called home ahead of time to let my parents know I was on my way. My dad picked up and in a panting voice said, "Now isn't a good time, drive around the block for 15 minutes." FML

I agree, your life sucks 104 075

You deserved it 6 726

The Top

Today, the woman who turned me down would rather date a bum who smokes weed all day and works at Panera Bread. I have 3 college degrees, a respectable career, and I’m drug free. No matter how much I point this out, she gets butthurt, and has now felt the need to block my social media. FML

I agree, your life sucks 275

You deserved it 2 477

Today, I was having sex with my girlfriend for the first time in over a month. When I came, I thrust one last time and let out a huge fart. She couldn't keep her mouth shut about it, and now all our friends keep calling me "CumFart". FML

I agree, your life sucks 41 454

You deserved it 9 133

Today, I broke up with my boyfriend for cheating on me. I refused his calls, so he texted, not to apologize, but to say I'd "left some clothes in his suitcase"; i.e., he stole some of my clothes. When he didn't get the response from me that he was hoping for, he texted, "I'm wearing your shorts." FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 055

You deserved it 125

Today, after weeks of summoning up the courage to come out of the closet to my best friend, I told her I was gay. Immediately after she started cracking up, thinking it was a joke. I was so confused and nervous, I went along with it. She still thinks I'm straight. FML

I agree, your life sucks 45 831

You deserved it 7 460

Today, I have a degree in electrical engineering, my wife was doing a crossword and asked me what are the units of capacitance, I couldn't remember. FML

I agree, your life sucks 19 078

You deserved it 9 109

Today, my boyfriend and I broke up. I said that at least I was always there for him when he needed me. He said "When did I need you?" FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 044

You deserved it 6 327

Same thing different taste

Snitched

Dumbass

Jedi mind trick

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