NO LOVE! dont hurt me dont hurt me no more.

Strengthen that grip? Pun intended?

That kinda defeats the purpose...Why don't you try thinking about it?

Smiling forever alone face?

forever alone face is always smiling actually. he or she is very optimistic.

All I could think of when I read this was the Team America theme song.

Lol, why did that song pop into your head? Love the movie though.

Priceless movie. I just thought of it since OP is from the US and even though he searched worldwide, he'll apparently be stuck now in the "real world" and the "big words" thing just doesn't seem to fit into the American standard anymore (I'm a nerd in America, so I feel the pain, haha), and that's where I started singing "America....."

Hehe I get it. I'm from Ohio, and very nerdy. I guess you are correct in saying the American standard of education is terrible now.

There's no point. An Earth girl has won the 'Miss Universe' title every single year. It's like the rest aren't even trying. If he can't find her on Earth, he's not going to find her out there....

#58 TRUE! but OP isnt looking for "the most beautiful one" (personally I wouldnt pick miss Universe as most beautiful woman anyway) but for "that special someone" (or something) maybe an alien is unique enough.

Calm down Lil Wayne.

Eminem*

Is someone down-voting every post I have in every FML just to be a dick?

I'm just trying to be nice to the OP. So, let's try this again: OP, there is someone out there for you. Just because they aren't on eHarmony doesn't mean that you'll never find them. Don't give up hope.

I thumbed you down because you accused people of thumbing you down just because they're dicks. My guess is that you were thumbed down in the first place because you were offering other dating sites simply because they worked for you. It's just a guess, but had you not made that accusation, that would have been the main reason that I would have thumbed you down.

OKCupid have some awesome social data from users on their blog. It's almost mind boggling sometimes. But maybe checking it out it can help OP present himself better on the webz.

#47- People are like that, only because it makes them feel better about themselves. People hate on me too because they think I'm some depressed loser. I think your advice was good. As far as finding that special someone, I haven't found anyone, but am I really going to let that ruin my life? But I'll probably get hated on for saying this...

OkCupid really is the best dating site for finding other unique people from all over the world. Nerds isn't just plugging some random site. All my nerdy and kinky friends love it.

I was about to suggest OKCupid. You don't have to spend too much time on creating your profile, and there really are questions you can answer, and answering them increases potential to find a match. And, as it was said, it is also free, so there is great deal of chance to find far more people there.