Health: Today, I found out that my husband thinks I'm fat when I caught... - FML

By apparentfatty - 11/11/2011 11:50 - Canada

Today, I found out that my husband thinks I'm fat when I caught him slipping diet pills into my morning smoothie. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 335

You deserved it 7 133

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Same thing different taste

By Anonymous - 26/12/2017 06:00

Today, I learned that my husband is attracted to obese, unhealthy women after celebrating my weight loss of 175lbs and improving my overall health. FML

I agree, your life sucks 5 265

You deserved it 421

Receipe ideas

By Anonymous - 24/05/2022 16:00

Today, after I was surprised by my husband announcing he was coming off the drink and going to the gym to get in shape, I found out that I've been such a fool, as it turns out the pre-workout shakes he kept making contained about 5 shots of vodka, so he could drink at home without me moaning. FML

I agree, your life sucks 973

You deserved it 148

By suckstobefat - 22/01/2012 06:10 - Canada

Today, I found out that the daily "vitamins" that my dad has been giving me for the last three months were actually weight loss pills. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 760

You deserved it 7 220

By brittrod - 05/12/2011 01:13 - United States

Today, when my mother-in-law told me I was losing weight, my husband started laughing. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 047

You deserved it 3 386

By Mimi - 16/04/2013 01:35 - United States - Vallejo

Today, my husband told me that he thinks I am getting a little heavy and may need to lay off the junk food. The ultrasound is hanging on our fridge. FML

I agree, your life sucks 61 782

You deserved it 5 757

Egg mode

By Anonymous - 22/11/2020 22:58

Today, I found out my husband had a Pornhub account where he photoshops himself to look like a girl. The worst part is that I noticed he wore some of my maternity clothes in the pictures. I guess they were the only ones big enough to fit him. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 063

You deserved it 184

By Glutton - 28/01/2010 01:29 - United States

Today, my boyfriend and I started our diet. After a long day of being held accountable for every calorie I ate, I went home to sneak a snack. My boyfriend came over to surprise me, and found me on the couch shoveling left-over Indian food into my mouth. FML

I agree, your life sucks 6 261

You deserved it 49 614

By Username - 28/03/2011 05:26 - United States

Today, I discovered my boyfriend has been slipping me abortion pills to "supplement" my regular birth control. FML

I agree, your life sucks 50 312

You deserved it 5 468

By hungry - 01/01/2015 05:50 - United States

Today, is the fourth day of my husband's and my new diet and exercise routine. I've already caught him eating junk food 4 times. He has lost 2 lbs and I've gained 3. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 753

You deserved it 4 012

By fatty milkshakes - 29/01/2013 22:56 - United States

Today, I found out that my roommate has been switching my protein powder with chocolate milk mix and brown sugar. Since I work out frequently, I've been consuming large amounts of this and have gained at least 10 pounds of fat. His reason? I turned his bookbag inside out. Once. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 164

You deserved it 9 184

Next

Top comments

Yellow_Fish79 11

Friday 11 November 2011 16:05

Slip penis enlargement pills in his drinks. ;D

Miss_Michaela 10

Friday 11 November 2011 16:05

Well, show him that you think he's constipated by slipping laxatives into his morning coffee.

Comments

rogo35 0

Saturday 12 November 2011 4:06

Well look at it this way if you weren't fat he wouldn't do it

ChronicBluntz420 7

Saturday 12 November 2011 4:11

He's doing you a favor.

MaddiLovesYou12 0

Saturday 12 November 2011 4:17

What a jerk

XavierMedina 0

Saturday 12 November 2011 5:06

That's messed up.

PapaBear236 0

Saturday 12 November 2011 6:05

Well just the fact that you have a morning smoothie says......I mean, I'm not trying to be a........Oh screw it.

ppl2ppl 4

Saturday 12 November 2011 7:28

Bahahaha I agree with number 3, slip penis pills, if he catches you and asks you why, just say that you found out that he felt you were too big and that you feel that he is too small. ;D and hey you'll enjoy it so go for it :D lmao

abbyhoneywaffles 11

Saturday 12 November 2011 8:10

well thats rude.

SouthernKiller 4

Saturday 12 November 2011 8:14

The only problem I see here is that the husband let himself get caught. Bet that was ackward!

Freeze_fml 16

Saturday 12 November 2011 10:34

You say morning smoothie like it's some regular thing you have.

fml_ydi79 15

Saturday 12 November 2011 15:54

Cares for his own benefit you mean

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The Top

Today, my husband filed for divorce. He also put himself “In a relationship” with my daughter on Facebook. She turned 18 a few days ago. He says it’s no big deal because, “at least I waited until she was legal.” The spineless idiot just doesn’t get it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 091

You deserved it 160

Today, my boyfriend and I were having sex, and, in the heat of the moment, I cried out for him to go harder. He then had an exasperated expression on his face, and, in an adamantly offended tone, said, "Don't tell me what to do." Then he left the room. FML

I agree, your life sucks 65 191

You deserved it 9 151

The Top

Today, my boyfriend and I slept together. In the middle of the night, he saw my phone receiving a text from someone saying, "Hey baby, I missed you so much! I'm going to be visiting in a couple of days, hope to see you again, I love you!" He got mad and left my house. It was my dad in Ohio. FML

I agree, your life sucks 54 100

You deserved it 4 916

Today, my girlfriend offered to roleplay as a sexy nun, then dumped me, claiming my saying yes meant I was attacking her catholic faith and that I’m a sick, depraved criminal. She was the one who offered. I’m not remotely interested in roleplay, I only agreed cause I thought it was her kink. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 689

You deserved it 132

Today, I showed my son the old trick of turning a calculator upside down and spelling "BOOBIES" on it in numbers. He laughed, then spent nearly 20 minutes trying to spell "COCKS", before giving up and hurling the calculator across the room. I wish my sperm had a warranty. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 465

You deserved it 6 897

Today, within 20 minutes of waking up, my dad gave me a pained look and said: "Uhh, turns out your laptop isn't waterproof." FML

I agree, your life sucks 24 923

You deserved it 1 428

Today, I spent $70 on party supplies for my sister's bachelorette party, another hour decorating, three hours baking and designing a cake, before waiting five hours to hear that she and another bridesmaid had 'moved' the party elsewhere. Cake anyone? FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 573

You deserved it 1 930

Today, my boyfriend and I got intimate with each other for the first time. He shoved his hand down my pants, touched about an inch away from my clitoris, and whispered, "Cummm" in my ear. I doubt I'll have an orgasm ever again. FML

I agree, your life sucks 41 039

You deserved it 4 252