Intimacy: Today, I had to sleep in the same room as my grandparents. They... - FML

This is a Nearly FML. It’s an FML, nearly. It got positive votes from the users, by wasn’t approved by our team.

By Mike - 21/03/2009 15:38 - United States

Spicy

Today, I had to sleep in the same room as my grandparents. They checked to see if I was asleep, so I pretended to be to avoid getting scolded for staying up. Turns out they were checking so that they could make love. I witnessed two 70-year-olds have sex in the bed next to me for 20 minutes. FML

I agree, your life sucks 236 847

You deserved it 31 386

Winter: Snow and Funny News
Snuggle up and laugh with our winter stories, where snow isn't the only thing sliding around! More…

Previous FML Next FML

Top comments

Wittlestalker 0

Saturday 21 March 2009 23:05

o_______o Get some therapy as soon as you can. I say that in the most respectful, concerned way I possibly can manage...

shantoyamuchluv 0

Saturday 21 March 2009 23:06

20 minutes?! Way to go gramps.

Comments

sapm90 0

Sunday 22 March 2009 16:05

did they have to use their oxygen tanks midway?

lilian96 0

Sunday 22 March 2009 16:15

thanks #79 :( & same here #103 you comment will pop up in my mind everytime i eat pizza .

FMLgirl_fml 0

Sunday 22 March 2009 16:37

i think that was cute... old ppl acting like young ppl do all the time.. how many of you ppl who live at home wait for your parents go to sleep... or room mate or whoever. people in their 70's have more sex then those in their 30's statistically speaking... mainly because the kids are out of the house with their own families. i could just picture grandma looking over and being like "sweety are you sleeping" no reply. and she turns to Gramps and says "ok hun, lets put that viagra to work" HA HA

kates_07 0

Sunday 22 March 2009 17:58

hahaha omg lmao!!

Sakeyaki 0

Sunday 22 March 2009 18:03

Mmm, old people sex.

Demetra_fml 0

Sunday 22 March 2009 18:54

At least they still got pizazz!

nudgie 0

Sunday 22 March 2009 19:46

Good for them that they could do it for that long, but bad for you that you had to pretend to be asleep while they did. No one should have to watch 70 year old people having sex...ewwww(uncontrollable shivers).

daninatoreloaded 0

Sunday 22 March 2009 21:10

Two 70 year olds lasted 20 min..? Nice.

jara9801 0

Sunday 22 March 2009 21:35

That's prob the worst one I've heard yet, Sorry!!

briiittxxhc 0

Sunday 22 March 2009 21:58

Oh man. I feel sorry for you. I would be scarred for life. Ew.

8
9
10
11
12
13
14
15
16
17

Keywords

Healthy Lifestyle Poopoo peepee Gross Health Work Christmas Ironic Gamers Holidays Video games Gifts Public freakouts AITA Am I overreacting? Embarrassing Love Racism Miscellaneous Family Toxic Friends Drunk Coworkers Furniture Sex Intimacy Parents Lonely Relatable Kids

The Top

Today, it started pouring while I was in the middle of a pizza delivery. I had to stand out in the rain for ten minutes while an old redneck dude wearing nothing but camo boxers fumbled around for the exact change to pay the bill. I think seeing his junk was supposed to count as my tip. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 793

You deserved it 3 231

Today, my boyfriend and I decided to try the ice cubes in the vagina thing we'd read about. He kept sticking one in after another and they got stuck. My vagina had a brain freeze for a half an hour. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 789

You deserved it 3 964

The Top

Today, my friends thought it would be funny to try and break a watermelon on my head while I was asleep on the couch. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 889

You deserved it 3 726

Today, my mother got heartburn. She claimed she only gets heartburn when she is near a pregnant woman. She threatened to kick me out of the house if I didn't take a pregnancy test, despite there being no way I was pregnant. Turns out, I am pregnant, and my mother's ego has never been bigger. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 582

You deserved it 9 925

Today, I discovered that my boyfriend has been having an intimate text exchange with a woman. She's the grieving widow of his friend who died three weeks ago. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 361

You deserved it 2 813

Today, my navy boyfriend, who's stationed in Italy, calls me to say he is in San Francisco and is coming to see me. After scrambling to get ready, he calls me back to say he doesn't recognize the train station. After searching on Google Maps, it becomes clear he's drunk at Oktoberfest. In Germany. FML

I agree, your life sucks 45 246

You deserved it 3 278

Today, a couple of friends and I were driving around town and saw a lady who had accidentally backed her car up onto a concrete wall. Laughing, we all turned to look as we passed and I drove straight into a parked police car that had stopped to help her. FML

I agree, your life sucks 10 186

You deserved it 102 526

Today, I cried so much I felt nauseous and almost puked. Why was I crying? I made up a hot, brooding, cold, and heartless guy who secretly cared about me, and who's super protective. Then I imagined him dying by being stabbed. I cried over a guy I made up in my head. FML

I agree, your life sucks 193

You deserved it 1 343