Animals: Today, I had to take my dog to the vet for him to be put to sleep....

By Anonymous - 26/08/2011 17:49 - United States

Today, I had to take my dog to the vet for him to be put to sleep. I could feel the cold, hard shaft of irony slide its way up my ass and slowly fuck me senseless with every step I took on this beautiful National Dog Day. FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 719

You deserved it 6 139

Thanksgiving: Turkeys and Skids
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Same thing different taste

By byegeorge - 17/08/2012 11:26 - United Kingdom - Hounslow

Today, my dog was run over. The man who ran over my dog was taking his own dog to the emergency vet. As the man awkwardly tried to apologise to me, he said, "Think of the irony". FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 878

You deserved it 1 984

By deaddoggy - 02/03/2016 20:46 - New Zealand - Palmerston North

Today, I took my 17 year-old dog, who had been my best friend my entire life right from when I was born, to be euthanised. I had booked in advance. The vet ambled in all spritely and cheerfully asked, "Just here for a checkup, aye?" FML

I agree, your life sucks 24 087

You deserved it 1 542

By Anonymous - 27/09/2010 13:17 - Australia

Today, I was playing with my dog, teasing her, to cheer myself up after being dumped by my girlfriend. My dog bit me hard and I had to go to hospital. The dog has to be put down. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 779

You deserved it 11 014

By Anonymous - 24/01/2011 05:40 - Egypt

Today, I woke up, patted my dog and kissed his nose. He was dead. FML

I agree, your life sucks 76 680

You deserved it 4 334

Zero stars on Yelp

By Anonymous - 07/06/2024 09:00 - United States

Today, I had to put my 12 year-old dog down because he had dementia. I was told I got to lay on the floor with him, and say when I was ready. The vet brought my dog out on a stretcher, had the vet tech put him in a choke-hold, and administered the drugs before I could speak. Now, I have PTSD and she has to undergo sensitivity training. FML

I agree, your life sucks 604

You deserved it 114

By jrad - 08/09/2010 19:23 - United States

Today, I went to move my dog that had been napping in the middle of my bed for the last few hours, only to discover that he wasn't napping. He died. FML

I agree, your life sucks 66 836

You deserved it 3 553

By Anonymous - 14/09/2012 16:51 - United States

Today, my 12 year-old dog died. My boyfriend's attempts to comfort me involved him muttering, "At least she knows how to play dead now." FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 155

You deserved it 2 391

Bad news

By Anonymous - 01/08/2020 20:01

Today, I knew it was going to be a fun day when I woke up to find that my kids' new puppy had died in the night. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 889

You deserved it 129

Is that really a silver lining?

By miss_peppermint - This FML is from back in 2018 but it's good stuff

Today, my dog of 10 years died suddenly. My husband’s response? “At least you don’t have to buy dog food anymore." FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 383

You deserved it 304

Sorry for your loss

By grant - 06/03/2021 20:01

Today, I was absolutely crucified online for asking the vet’s office how much it would cost to put my dog down. She's terminally ill. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 174

You deserved it 113

irollup 4

Friday 26 August 2011 23:10

This was wonderfully written. I've never read an FML so descriptive.

gunmania0 12

Friday 26 August 2011 23:10

That was a good hard metaphor.

Comments

CrAzYyEt 8

Saturday 27 August 2011 0:11

That was painfully graphic.

my_usagi 0

Saturday 27 August 2011 0:16

I absolutely love this fml. Very well written.

Synyster430 0

Saturday 27 August 2011 0:21

How did FML allow this???

Serafie 0

Saturday 27 August 2011 0:23

Sorry about that, man :( The metaphor was weird as hell tho, not gonna lie.

yaknowiverse 0

Saturday 27 August 2011 0:26

my sorry about your dog :(

abouttofly 12

Saturday 27 August 2011 0:28

I can't stand all the people here loving the analogy. Please consider how insensitive it must be to people who have been raped.

lightburns 10

Saturday 27 August 2011 0:49

I have no time for people who use the idiom "I can't stand". Please consider how insensitive it must be to people who are wheelchair-bound.

dmeloccaro 5

Saturday 27 August 2011 2:32

Wheelchair bound. Lmao this is hilarious.

niwra 0

Saturday 27 August 2011 9:54

All my life I have dreamed of being this clever. Nice rebuttal to an annoyingly unnecessary comment.

abouttofly 12

Saturday 27 August 2011 21:44

If my comment was unnecessary, there wouldn't be a bunch of people on here laughing at rape jokes. As for my usage of "I can't stand", I apologize for any harm this phrasing may have caused. It's clear that you weren't actually bothered by the usage and are just mocking me, but your mockery fails because I am actually concerned about my usage of language and will try to change if I find out that I am offending people.

LittlestOne13 6

Saturday 27 August 2011 0:29

Ew that's a nasty metaphor O.o

InsanePPG 25

Saturday 27 August 2011 0:43

7 years ago I had to put my pet rabbit to sleep 2 days before Easter, so I feel your pain there. I'm really sorry about your dog, but I'm sure he had a great life.