Health: Today, I learned the hard way that you should never use medical...

By pain - 01/11/2011 14:52 - United States

Today, I learned the hard way that you should never use medical tape to secure gauze over a razor cut on your scrotum. FML

I agree, your life sucks 10 177

You deserved it 39 872

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Same thing different taste

By Anonymous - 28/06/2009 18:44 - United States

Today, I was riding my bike without the seat cover on. I hit a curb wrong and the two metal rods from the skeleton of the seat went through my jeans. I went to the med clinic to then find out that I had to get stitches in my scrotum. There were no male doctors. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 433

You deserved it 49 770

By Anonymous - 07/03/2015 04:26 - United States

Today, I tried shaving my bikini area for the first time. I ended up cutting myself several times. I now have impressive razor burn, and it's incredibly painful to even wear pants. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 994

You deserved it 6 352

Itchy and scratchy

By Anonymous - 27/07/2021 00:01

Today, it turned out the razor I used for manscaping wasn't as new and sharp as I'd thought. My entire crotch is now overcome with an unfathomable amount of razor burn. FML

I agree, your life sucks 734

You deserved it 369

By Chicketi - 11/02/2009 14:45 - Canada

Today, I cut myself on a band-aid box, while trying to get one out for another cut. FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 988

You deserved it 8 240

By Anonymous - 21/10/2010 10:57 - Australia

Today, I was shaving my left armpit when I cut myself badly. I wondered whether or not it would be safe to shave my right armpit, then reasoned that it couldn’t possibly happen twice. It did. FML

I agree, your life sucks 17 191

You deserved it 27 968

By monkeycannon7 - 24/04/2012 16:36 - United States - Woodbridge

Today, I learned the hard way not to take off your shirt with a toothpick in your mouth. FML

I agree, your life sucks 8 346

You deserved it 29 705

By Bobby M - 16/05/2011 16:33 - Ireland

Today, I got circumcised by my zipper. FML

I agree, your life sucks 68 527

You deserved it 10 688

By Loki16 - 02/06/2016 08:40 - United States - New York

Today, my girlfriend helped me apply liquid bandaid over an open wound. Unfortunately, she grabbed the liquid wart remover instead. FML

I agree, your life sucks 8 521

You deserved it 757

By tylerlove361 - 11/02/2009 05:30 - United States

Today, I cut myself with child-proof scissors. FML

I agree, your life sucks 16 077

You deserved it 34 033

Thorn in my side

By CantPublish - 15/01/2012 03:07 - United States

Today, during swimming in PE, I kept noticing a stinging feeling on my scrotum. Every time I jumped into the water I would feel a sharp stab. After the full hour of hell, I went to the bathroom and looked in my new trunks. The designer had left a sewing needle in the crotch netting. FML

I agree, your life sucks 44 088

You deserved it 4 994

Andr913 13

Tuesday 1 November 2011 18:55

What the **** is wrong with you?

fortehlulocaust 6

Tuesday 1 November 2011 18:55

Just a bit of pain I take it?

Comments

svpanther 3

Tuesday 1 November 2011 22:41

Ummm okay then...

drmountaindeww 0

Tuesday 1 November 2011 23:16

I learned that when i was like 6... Except it was further up...

mickeygirl 0

Tuesday 1 November 2011 23:24

What the hell is a razor doing on it scrotum? U shave it?

L3g4lPl4typus 0

Tuesday 1 November 2011 23:31

and this is why you don't shave your balls man

ftw487 9

Tuesday 1 November 2011 23:48

Thats just common sense, dumbass

LennyComa 39

Tuesday 1 November 2011 23:53

Did your eyes water?

ArielTheMermaid 17

Tuesday 1 November 2011 23:55

Exactly like an FML from yesterday...

CuteDumBlonde64 11

Tuesday 1 November 2011 23:56

Try explaining this to a Doctor. XD

thatmirandachick 7

Wednesday 2 November 2011 0:53

So much wrong with this post..

EllyMo 15

Wednesday 2 November 2011 0:56

THATS NOT HOW SPERM DONATION WORKS D; Not cool dude

Keywords

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The Top

Today, I annoyed my friend by texting him "Meow" over and over at random times of the day because when he's drunk he meows in his sleep. Apparently a great way to get back at me was to tell my parents I wasn't a virgin, and that I got high on Wednesday. He had pictures to prove it for both. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 634

You deserved it 68 712

Today, I spent an entire hour talking to someone at a party. I was feeling a real connection, only to find out halfway through the conversation that she wasn’t actually a guest, she was the caterer who just happened to be really nice. FML

I agree, your life sucks 304

You deserved it 188

The Top

Today, I got so drunk that I decided it was a good idea to get naked and jump on a trampoline in the back of a neighbour’s garden. Said neighbour is a police officer. FML

I agree, your life sucks 10 998

You deserved it 46 802

Today, I ate the last Hot Pocket in the house. My little brother threw a temper tantrum and poured a bucket of water all over my desk and Macbook. My mom’s response? “Aw he’s just a little boy.” My brother is 13. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 464

You deserved it 121

Today, I was on my way home from a friend's house. I called home ahead of time to let my parents know I was on my way. My dad picked up and in a panting voice said, "Now isn't a good time, drive around the block for 15 minutes." FML

I agree, your life sucks 104 074

You deserved it 6 726

Today, while walking to work, I saw a homeless guy with a funny "NEED MONEY 4 BOOZE" sign, so I gave him a few spare dollars for his humor. On my way back home, he was out cold on the sidewalk with several empty bottles beside him. Whoops. FML

I agree, your life sucks 21 172

You deserved it 40 149

Today, I dropped my car keys down the elevator shaft at my dorm. I had parked my car at a parking meter, and now had no way to get change out of my car. It took six hours for someone to get my keys, and I now have a $75 parking ticket. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 456

You deserved it 4 905

Today, I opened up to my boyfriend about being sexually abused in the past. He said it explains why I'm "such a bitch" when it comes to personal contact. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 069

You deserved it 2 331

Same thing different taste

Itchy and scratchy

Thorn in my side

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