Health: Today, I learned the hard way that you should never use medical...

By pain - 01/11/2011 14:52 - United States

Today, I learned the hard way that you should never use medical tape to secure gauze over a razor cut on your scrotum. FML

I agree, your life sucks 10 175

You deserved it 39 871

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Same thing different taste

By Anonymous - 28/06/2009 18:44 - United States

Today, I was riding my bike without the seat cover on. I hit a curb wrong and the two metal rods from the skeleton of the seat went through my jeans. I went to the med clinic to then find out that I had to get stitches in my scrotum. There were no male doctors. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 433

You deserved it 49 767

By Anonymous - 07/03/2015 04:26 - United States

Today, I tried shaving my bikini area for the first time. I ended up cutting myself several times. I now have impressive razor burn, and it's incredibly painful to even wear pants. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 993

You deserved it 6 351

Itchy and scratchy

By Anonymous - 27/07/2021 00:01

Today, it turned out the razor I used for manscaping wasn't as new and sharp as I'd thought. My entire crotch is now overcome with an unfathomable amount of razor burn. FML

I agree, your life sucks 731

You deserved it 368

By Chicketi - 11/02/2009 14:45 - Canada

Today, I cut myself on a band-aid box, while trying to get one out for another cut. FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 983

You deserved it 8 239

By Anonymous - 21/10/2010 10:57 - Australia

Today, I was shaving my left armpit when I cut myself badly. I wondered whether or not it would be safe to shave my right armpit, then reasoned that it couldn’t possibly happen twice. It did. FML

I agree, your life sucks 17 190

You deserved it 27 963

By monkeycannon7 - 24/04/2012 16:36 - United States - Woodbridge

Today, I learned the hard way not to take off your shirt with a toothpick in your mouth. FML

I agree, your life sucks 8 346

You deserved it 29 701

By Bobby M - 16/05/2011 16:33 - Ireland

Today, I got circumcised by my zipper. FML

I agree, your life sucks 68 521

You deserved it 10 688

By Loki16 - 02/06/2016 08:40 - United States - New York

Today, my girlfriend helped me apply liquid bandaid over an open wound. Unfortunately, she grabbed the liquid wart remover instead. FML

I agree, your life sucks 8 518

You deserved it 756

By tylerlove361 - 11/02/2009 05:30 - United States

Today, I cut myself with child-proof scissors. FML

I agree, your life sucks 16 077

You deserved it 34 032

Thorn in my side

By CantPublish - 15/01/2012 03:07 - United States

Today, during swimming in PE, I kept noticing a stinging feeling on my scrotum. Every time I jumped into the water I would feel a sharp stab. After the full hour of hell, I went to the bathroom and looked in my new trunks. The designer had left a sewing needle in the crotch netting. FML

I agree, your life sucks 44 087

You deserved it 4 994

Andr913 13

Tuesday 1 November 2011 18:55

What the **** is wrong with you?

fortehlulocaust 6

Tuesday 1 November 2011 18:55

Just a bit of pain I take it?

Comments

diablo83 4

Tuesday 1 November 2011 19:59

You're a failure

cajekraze 7

Tuesday 1 November 2011 19:59

That's just dumb. No other way to say it, bad call

Random017 7

Tuesday 1 November 2011 20:08

crystalburgard 3

Tuesday 1 November 2011 20:09

Hope you at least removed your scrotum beforehand, you should not reproduce

emmaweaver 0

Tuesday 1 November 2011 20:16

Well, so much for no-shave November!

Corygerm 9

Tuesday 1 November 2011 20:26

its just like tearing off a band-aid.... okay not really.

JayAyyEmm 0

Tuesday 1 November 2011 20:27

Nice way to start No Shave November.

invivoful 10

Tuesday 1 November 2011 20:32

Wait how the hell did y.... You know what? Nevermind.

Lubpynk 0

Tuesday 1 November 2011 20:43

I'm guessing you didn't do a great job shaving then if the tape hurt you that bad!

omggtfomi 1

Tuesday 1 November 2011 20:44

Wow... Dumb ass

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The Top

Today, I once again had to listen to my husband and the girl he’s cheating on me with have sex in our bed, all while I sleep on the couch in the living room. I’m an immigrant and got my Green Card through him. If I divorce him, Immigration will think the marriage was fraudulent and I’ll be deported back to my country. FML

I agree, your life sucks 725

You deserved it 284

Today, at work at an OB office, I heard a ruckus in the hallway before a very large woman burst into my room and tried to attack my very pregnant patient. Crazy lady is the wife of the pregnant lady’s baby daddy, who is nowhere to be found. I don’t get paid enough for this shit. FML

I agree, your life sucks 465

You deserved it 58

The Top

Today, I mistakenly shared my picture in my office group chat, then went to dinner. No one asked me to delete it for 30 minutes, then when I got a message that I'd shared it in the wrong window, I deleted it immediately. I don't know how many people saw the picture, and my manager also is in the group in addition to my colleagues. FML

I agree, your life sucks 233

You deserved it 1 069

Today, while dropping files off at my boss's house, I tripped and fell into his fish tank. We both watched as a crack spread all the way across the glass and shattered, covering his carpet in fish and water. His only words to me were, "I'll see you at work tomorrow. Maybe." FML

I agree, your life sucks 4 453

You deserved it 625

Today, I woke up in a girls bed, that I have had a crush on for two years. She was sleeping on the floor with someone else. FML

I agree, your life sucks 50 848

You deserved it 4 207

Today, while I was waiting to pull out of a parking space, my boyfriend decided it would be funny to put the car into reverse instead of drive while I was waiting for traffic to clear. I don't think the people who own the car behind me were laughing. Nor is my now ex-boyfriend. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 097

You deserved it 3 410

Today, I had a long call with my crush, the only person I have been in regular contact with for the past year. He regularly calls me to check up on me, and really cares about my interests. I'm not sure if he likes me back, or is just being friendly, and I'm too scared to ask him out. FML

I agree, your life sucks 763

You deserved it 511

Today, I went to my favorite coffee shop, ordered my usual, smiled at the barista I have a crush on, and confidently said, "You too!" when they told me to enjoy my drink. I have to find a new coffee shop. FML

I agree, your life sucks 141

You deserved it 310

Same thing different taste

Itchy and scratchy

Thorn in my side

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