Intimacy: Today, I lost my virginity. It took all of 30 seconds. FML

By unsatisfied - 09/02/2010 03:33 - France

Today, I lost my virginity. It took all of 30 seconds. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 463

You deserved it 5 362

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Same thing different taste

By Lady Vulva - 19/09/2015 02:56

Today, I lost my virginity to my boyfriend. It lasted about 20 seconds, and he cried during it. I later heard him telling his friends he'd given me a "damn good pounding" and "made her cum 3 times". I wish. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 980

You deserved it 3 073

By ShouldveStayedAVirgin - 13/01/2016 18:30 - United States - Houston

Today, I lost my virginity to my boyfriend of 7 years. He thrusted as fast as rabbits. I waited years for 10 seconds. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 925

You deserved it 7 087

By Anonymous - 03/11/2012 01:23 - Canada - Bedford

Today, I finally lost my virginity to my boyfriend. It hurt like hell, was over in less than a minute, and he tried to reuse the condom for a second round. FML

I agree, your life sucks 43 045

You deserved it 6 089

By Anonymous - 04/02/2013 17:17 - United States - Durham

Today, my girlfriend lost her virginity. I still have mine, though. FML

I agree, your life sucks 59 417

You deserved it 3 890

By NotALuckyGuy - 07/04/2015 16:19 - United States - Columbus

Today, I lost my virginity in a porta-potty. FML

I agree, your life sucks 19 033

You deserved it 47 399

New skills

By Anonymous - 27/09/2020 08:03 - United Kingdom - Bristol

Today, I lost my virginity. Today, I also learned how to fake an orgasm. Twice. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 111

You deserved it 1 199

Nuts

By Anonymous - 15/09/2011 20:03 - United States

Today, I lost my virginity to my boyfriend. Not only did he last just 2 minutes, he also sat there for a while afterwards, smacking his semi-erect penis in awe and saying, "Look, it's still hard! How crazy is that?!" FML

I agree, your life sucks 41 877

You deserved it 6 151

A tale as old as time

By flopsy - 03/12/2010 16:19 - Australia

Today, I was about to lose my virginity. I couldn't get it up. FML

I agree, your life sucks 52 418

You deserved it 11 365

By James - 22/07/2011 05:00 - United States

Today, I lost my virginity to the woman of my dreams. I finished before entering. I'm 28 years old. FML

I agree, your life sucks 48 914

You deserved it 12 117

By Anonymous - 10/03/2012 07:23 - United States

Today, my boyfriend and I decided it was time to lose our virginity. After our clothes were removed, we spent 30 minutes trying to figure out how to actually have sex, and eventually gave up. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 064

You deserved it 59 341

sucksforyoudude 0

Tuesday 9 February 2010 9:05

mist have been his first time too

AngryNinja 1

Tuesday 9 February 2010 22:03

no she didn't get rapped. eminem has better things to do. she probably didn't get raped either or she's say so.

Comments

danman91 0

Tuesday 9 February 2010 9:51

what a waste lol

angry_girl 0

Tuesday 9 February 2010 9:53

that blows .... ha ha blows

CallMeHush 0

Tuesday 9 February 2010 10:00

Double up on the latex.

Sandstorm_fml 0

Tuesday 9 February 2010 19:13

Stupidest thing I have ever heard.

HeeeB21 0

Tuesday 9 February 2010 10:12

I hope it wasn't to a guy LOL

terror_twins 0

Tuesday 9 February 2010 10:12

I wouldn't even call that sex hahaha

Snehvide 0

Tuesday 9 February 2010 10:18

sounds like my first time.. that suckes

ukiba 0

Tuesday 9 February 2010 10:25

maybe you should loosen up a little

sidvoltaire 0

Tuesday 9 February 2010 10:49

Deal with it

EPICApathy 0

Tuesday 9 February 2010 10:50

look at the bright atleast it wasn't 30 mins of the worst sex you had.

R3kli3 10

Tuesday 9 February 2010 11:02

Oh Jesus Lord!!

Keywords

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The Top

Today, a blowjob from my fiancée turned into exchanged oral, which turned into mutual masturbation while watching porn, which then turned into me being kicked out of the room because it was "weird" with me watching. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 349

You deserved it 403

Today, I told my roommate that I was an atheist and she laughed. I left and returned to find her and her prayer group praying for my soul. She told me to accept Jesus Christ as my lord and savior. I said no. Then she told me to find somewhere else to live. FML

I agree, your life sucks 4 855

You deserved it 1 042

The Top

Today, my boyfriend of 3 years announced that he is not ready for marriage, and won’t be for 'at least' another 2 years. Of course he waited to tell me this 2 days after he had proposed to me in front of hundreds of people, I said yes, and we announced it to all our family members and friends. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 240

You deserved it 2 882

Today, I was let go from my balloon-selling job at the zoo. They put a new monkey cage in my designated spot. I was literally fired so a monkey could take my place. FML

I agree, your life sucks 40 054

You deserved it 5 084

Today, my wife got the flu. While she was sleeping, I went out to buy her some soup and other things. When I was walking back through the door, she woke up, thought I was a burglar, and threw the closest thing to her at me. What was it? A cactus. FML

I agree, your life sucks 43 046

You deserved it 2 858

Today, since I'm too ashamed to go buy a proper sex toy, I used an old Star Wars toy sword instead. FML

I agree, your life sucks 14 133

You deserved it 56 900

Today, I went to my daughter's best friends birthday party, only to find my ex there, who is now sleeping with the mother, who has a fiancé in prison, who isn't going to be happy when he gets out. Most awkward kids birthday party ever. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 167

You deserved it 224

Today, I watched a supervisor in our workspace staple an underling's skirt to her shirt, as the supervisor didn't like her wearing a hip-level skirt, despite having no public contact. FML

I agree, your life sucks 759

You deserved it 95

Same thing different taste

New skills

Nuts

A tale as old as time

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