Intimacy: Today, I mentioned to my dad (we have a close relationship) that...

By diesel444 - 23/08/2010 05:05 - United States

Today, I mentioned to my dad (we have a close relationship) that my last condom had expired. Happy to buy me new ones for the sake of safe sex, he asked me "Do you need small, or extra small?" FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 837

You deserved it 23 197

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Same thing different taste

By fml - 22/06/2009 09:03 - United States

Today, I told my dad I was going to Walgreens and asked if he needed anything. He needed condoms, and that I should call him when I get there so he can explain the kind he likes. FML

I agree, your life sucks 68 447

You deserved it 5 478

By nottoosmall - 03/04/2013 16:57 - United States

Today, I was buying condoms at Walmart. I grabbed the XL size, and the cashier commented, "Ahh, you'll definitely need a smaller size." FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 772

You deserved it 15 624

By my honest father - 10/07/2013 16:33 - United States - Kansas City

Today, while having a serious talk with my father, he said, "Son, you're only alive because of a faulty, off-brand condom." FML

I agree, your life sucks 52 063

You deserved it 3 749

By accident - 14/02/2014 22:41 - United States - San Francisco

Today, my dad gave me the sex talk. After telling me all the stuff I already knew, he told me never to use Durex condoms. He said, "They break a lot. That's the only reason you're around today, really." then chuckled to himself. FML

I agree, your life sucks 61 058

You deserved it 5 828

Tiny Tim

By hmmmm - 13/08/2012 12:19 - Australia

Today, the condom slipped off, because my boyfriend refuses to admit that he needs to use smaller condoms. FML

I agree, your life sucks 41 337

You deserved it 5 480

By rxcrs3 - 09/08/2012 06:44 - United States

Today, as I was cashing a customer out, he stopped me in the middle of the transaction just to tell me that the condoms he was buying are too big for him. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 034

You deserved it 2 484

By nick - 06/03/2011 01:42 - United States

Today, my dad got drunk and asked if I had inherited his "abnormally tiny penis." FML

I agree, your life sucks 42 444

You deserved it 3 816

By xXxJoe16xXx - 01/12/2009 21:11 - United States

Today, I went to Walmart with my girlfriend. We bought the usual, food, Advil and condoms. While I waited in line, she went to grab everything. When she came back, I looked in the cart and saw no condoms. I asked her why she didn't get any. She replied "They ran out of smalls." Everyone laughed. FML

I agree, your life sucks 51 055

You deserved it 8 425

Running commentary

By well crap... - 21/06/2020 14:18

Today, I nervously went to the store to buy condoms for the first time. I felt like everything was going well, and checked out happily. As I was walking out, the cashier lady said to the woman next in line, "He thinks he's going to need condoms." They both looked at me and started laughing. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 140

You deserved it 218

Not a cheating!

By Notcheating - 03/12/2019 18:00

Today, my father-in-law caught me, a lesbian, buying condoms. He thought I was cheating. I didn’t know how to tell him that his daughter is allergic to our dildo. FML

I agree, your life sucks 4 270

You deserved it 490

FrEsHpRiNcE916 0

Monday 23 August 2010 12:12

like father like son!

buzzerbeeeeee 0

Monday 23 August 2010 12:25

if you're old enough to have sex you should buy your own condoms. ydi.

Comments

BigSchlong 4

Wednesday 9 January 2013 1:06

You said you two have a close relationship, was probably joking.

cptn_chronic 4

Wednesday 12 February 2014 21:58

you walked direct into that one.

CrazyLaughs4Me 17

Tuesday 17 June 2014 5:40

YDI for having such a small penis. Don't get mad at your dad for him being so honest.

KJxFTW 6

Wednesday 5 November 2014 3:11

your dad sounds awesome :D

Brightblue2 14

Thursday 5 February 2015 8:12

Well you are asking your dad to buy condoms for you. If you are having sex, you should be able to afford to have safe sex by yourself without having daddy to buy them for you.

charityrose3 13

Sunday 28 February 2016 6:19

So? Which one is it?

TheRealStunts 27

Monday 11 April 2016 20:18

Man, dont be so bummed out, sounds more like he was joking or maybe as someone else mentioned he might think his small dick got passed genetically to you too ?