By me - 14/01/2012 01:38 - United States

Today, I met my son for the first time since I had to put him up for adoption over two decades ago. I wanted to make amends and get to know him. Instead, all I got to know was how well he can throw a punch. FML
I agree, your life sucks 24 208
You deserved it 57 067
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Top comments

docscientist 9

You're right, he should've left him in a dumpster.

251 28

Comments

IKickPuppiesHard 16

As someone who is in a similar situation as your son, I'm 100% with him. If I ever meet my father I plan to do the same thing. Though I must say I also dont plan to hate him forever. Im old enough to know that throwing an attitude wont fix anything; just that punching him square in the face would feel so good. Anyway I hope he eventually begins accepting you. Good luck OP.

16 8
ms92497 4

What dod you want, for him to forget evrything and act like nothing jappened

3 5
desireev 17

It's not fair for people to say that OP deserved it. It was either adoption, or finding the baby seriously neglected or, even worse,(God forbid), dead.. Sometimes, people aren't financially ready or even mature enough to take care of a baby. That's what the adoption system was made for. It would have been unfair for OP to keep the baby knowing he couldn't take care of it. Put the baby up for adoption so you know the child will be taken care of. That is the strongest love of all. Giving up your child so it can have a better life instead of keeping it and risking it's life just because you wanted to be selfish and keep the baby knowing you couldn't take care of it. You made a good choice OP! Don't let anyone tell you different! You obviously loved your son more than anything and wanted him to have a good life. Once again, excellent choice!

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illmatic2 16

I see your point, but you don't know why OP put him up for adoption. So you can't really say that what he made an excellent choice.

4 10
ACM1991 9

You are so right :) Excellent comment. :)

7 2
GoW_Chick 14

What if OP gave him up because he simply didn't want him, and now he feels guilty, I am just throwing that option out since we don't know the whole story, I am ready for my thumbs down, I just wanted to point out it could have been either.

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desireev 17

55 and 62- I'm going to go with the options I left because OP put "had to" in his FML. If he didn't want his son, he wouldn't have "had to" give him up for adoption.

11 2
KunoKanashimi 3

Well, one would kind of think that something such as that had happened, rather than the child being unwanted, since it said the OP had to give him up. Plus, I'm pretty sure if OP didn't want the child in the first place, he wouldn't be visiting his son.

10 0
illmatic2 16

I see, but many parents have their children taken away from them because of drug problems or abuse, so it's not always the parent's choice. If that was the case then I would understand why his son would be so angry.

2 5
desireev 17

118- There is a BIG difference between giving your child up for adoption and child protective services taking the child away. OP did the right thing by giving his son up for adoption. He felt that he "had to". With that being said, there was probably a damn good reason behind it. He wanted his son to have the good life that OP knew he couldn't provide for his child. That is selfless love right there.

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illmatic2 16

Yes, child protective services comes and takes your kids away and puts them in a foster home. The OP did say he had to put him up for adoption, but that doesn't necessarily mean that child services wasn't involved.

1 8
thatcaligirl 5

thank you! finally someone says what i want to say

2 0
audiophileMom 11

107 - or not putting "had to" would've made him look bad, cause a rise of the trolls and get him criticism instead of symathy... But cute thought your other statement. I'm guessing the mother made the decision and he didn't want to be a single dad.

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desireev 17

192- It's the Internet. Although, he shouldn't have put a serious FML on the Internet because he was just setting himself up for ridicule, he probably isn't worried about 'looking bad' or impressing anybody. I know I wouldn't be worried about it. He, truly, probably couldn't take proper care of the child so he gave his son up for adoption. What you said could very well be true. The mother probably made the decision, but since HE sought his son out and looked for him, I doubt that he just didn't want the baby. He probably knew he couldn't give it the life another family could. And it's obviously bothered him so badly that he wanted to seek out his son and try and have a relationship with him. Better late than never..

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tskat2 3

I agree with some of your reason but foster care can be a ruff place their isn't a 100% chance you will even be adopted and let face it the foster home system is no were near flawless I mean if you are not adopted by a 18 your kicked out nowhere to go

0 0
ogf27 3

DDesireev. Finally someone understands adoption. U sai

0 0
ash1rose 11

Some of these comments are very harsh and unfounded as is the number of "You deserved it" votes. Adoption is a very hard decision and you shouldn't judge if you don't know the circumstances. I'm sorry OP. I hope in time you can have a relationship with your son :(

23 2
sharpshot380 0

wow a sucker or gut or groin?

1 2
Awsumuzzie 12

I bet the son was dying to meet OP just to do that, so the kid must be happy :) for now, kids always come back. So OP, you probably opened the door back into his life with a strong hand.

4 0
KunoKanashimi 3

How so? Care to explain in a detailed way as to how someone who HAD TO give up their child would deserve it?

1 0
shadevil75 6

I'm sorry and hopefully once he matures he'll understand that was an inappropriate way to greet you no matter how angry he was at being put up for adoption.

3 3
doorick 4

as ****** up as that is.. it made me laugh

4 5
GoW_Chick 14

Well at least he gave you something to remember him by... He just needs time to cool off, and process the situation, you can't expect him to be all hugs, and giggles after two decades.

5 0