Intimacy: Today, I realised the only preparation I've done for my final...

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By vivelawank - 10/05/2014 20:52 - United Kingdom

Today, I realised the only preparation I've done for my final French exam has been wanking off to French porn. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 660

You deserved it 60 236

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Same thing different taste

By polimeros - 09/05/2012 22:19 - Mexico - Queretaro

Today, I had to excuse myself from the classroom so I could have a quick wank. This was because I somehow got extremely horny during a lesson on frog reproduction. FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 612

You deserved it 41 850

By james - 14/12/2008 13:14 - United Kingdom

Today, whilst reading all 15 pages of this site, my French girlfriend asked me over my shoulder for translations, such as "What is buttsex?", "What is wanking?", and "What means farted?" FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 122

You deserved it 6 866

C'est la langue de l'amour!

By Anonymous - 19/10/2017 05:00

Today, my French teacher set up a role-play scenario to act out in front of the class. During one of my lines, I mispronounced a phrase and called my teacher sexy. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 096

You deserved it 462

By boner - 01/02/2010 20:51 - United States

Today, I was spacing out in French class and randomly got an erection. My professor called on me to stand up at the front of the room and say, "I am wearing a belt," in French. Not everyone was observing just my belt. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 677

You deserved it 6 186

By TomPom - 25/11/2008 06:54 - France

Today, in one of the corridors at university, I was pretending to have passionate sex with one of my lecturers to make my mates laugh. She happened to walk by just at that moment. She reminded me when my next exam is; she will be marking me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 9 313

You deserved it 37 607

By kiki - 05/08/2010 18:24 - United States

Today, I realized that in French, my name means "penis." This wouldn't be so bad if my dad wasn't fluent in French. FML

I agree, your life sucks 46 362

You deserved it 3 884

By French - 24/10/2013 12:52 - Australia - Saint Kilda

Today, I taught my girlfriend some French. She then used her newfound language to break up with me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 44 733

You deserved it 4 695

By MyHeadHurts - 20/01/2012 10:42 - Ireland

Today, I got bored looking at porn. FML

I agree, your life sucks 19 218

You deserved it 39 619

By SpanishInFrenchClass - 06/12/2012 05:35 - United States

Today, I had a presentation in French class. I was so nervous, the first thing I said when I got up there was, "Hola." FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 784

You deserved it 5 441

Drawing a blank

By Anonymous - 04/03/2021 08:01

Today, I sat my end of year assessment. I was quite pleased that nothing I learned in my syllabus came up on the test. FML

I agree, your life sucks 848

You deserved it 113

lissa_jade 22

Sunday 11 May 2014 1:10

then stop playing with your "oui oui" and study !

moo_and_bloo 10

Sunday 11 May 2014 1:06

Wow. Good job.(sarcasm)

Comments

RamonTheGamer 7

Sunday 11 May 2014 5:23

Link Please.

plunkit 6

Sunday 11 May 2014 5:32

'Je peux jouir sur tes nichons' is a valid French phrase. But will it be in the exam?

MikeyScene420 17

Sunday 11 May 2014 5:37

I did that for my AP Environmental Science exam. I watched lots of outdoor **** because they were one with the environment lol

thissexyguy96 11

Sunday 11 May 2014 5:43

Atleast you got two for one u got to learn French and **********. Lol

aubama_fml 15

Sunday 11 May 2014 6:52

Surely hearing moaning and climax in French helps building a lot of vocabulary

ldkindasucks 6

Sunday 11 May 2014 6:54

At least you can say "**** me!" in French if you fail. Silver lining ^_^

whyusofat 17

Sunday 11 May 2014 7:06

I guess you heard and saw your fair share of "weewee's" huh op?

sundaisy 6

Sunday 11 May 2014 8:21

Maybe you might want to learn how to spell realized instead of watching French ****

dispwned 8

Sunday 11 May 2014 9:00

Well, that's one way of making it stick...

dawood_k 27

Sunday 11 May 2014 10:28

You're cumming along

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Today, my toddler realised that my pregnancy means I can't move easily anymore. He celebrated his freedom by doing everything he's not allowed to, and staying just outside my reach at all times. He loves his new game, and it looks like he's not going to stop anytime soon. FML

I agree, your life sucks 5 702

You deserved it 837

Today, after my man told me to get the dishes done and clean up the kitchen, he got mad at me because I didn’t answer my phone when our son needed medicine that was downstairs. I didn’t hear it ring because I was throwing out the trash, cleaning out the fridge, and washing the dishes, like I was told to do. FML

I agree, your life sucks 942

You deserved it 304

The Top

Today, there was a karaoke at my job's Thanksgiving party. A girl sang and sounded horrible. I later told a colleague about it and said, "She sucked so bad… if I wanted to hear an animal dying, I'd go to a slaughterhouse." She was within earshot and burst into tears. Oh, and she's my boss's daughter. FML

I agree, your life sucks 204

You deserved it 1 675

Today, I told my girlfriend I wanted to tell her something important. Coincidentally, she did too. She wanted to tell me that she thinks she's actually gay. I wanted to tell her I love her. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 295

You deserved it 248

Today, I celebrated my birthday with my friend who has the same birthday by going out to dinner with a bunch of our friends. The waiter brought out a cake for my friend but not for me. No one noticed my exclusion. I sang happy birthday on my birthday. FML

I agree, your life sucks 60 239

You deserved it 3 945

Today, I was so tired that I fell asleep on the toilet, and then had to give my boss a valid reason for why I was late. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 079

You deserved it 5 241

Today, I finally sought help for my crippling fear of elevators. When I arrived at my new therapist's office, I found the door to the stairs locked. To get to my appointment on the third floor of the building, I have to take the elevator. FML

I agree, your life sucks 4 280

You deserved it 569

Today, I was out shopping, when I noticed a teenage girl with a double stroller picking up a pack of condoms. I couldn't help but mutter that it was a little late for those. A guy who must have been her boyfriend then stormed over and beat the shit out of me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 20 278

You deserved it 77 718

Same thing different taste

C'est la langue de l'amour!

Drawing a blank

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