Miscellaneous: Today, I saw a coin on the ground. As I bent over to pick it...

By asdffhhjk - 15/05/2013 08:08 - Philippines - Makati

Today, I saw a coin on the ground. As I bent over to pick it up, some dude came up from behind, grabbed my waist and humped me three times. He ran away before I could get a good look at his face. FML

I agree, your life sucks 56 102

You deserved it 9 389

When Christmas Ends Badly…
Rather than debating politics with Uncle Roger for the umpteenth time, share the best Christmas FMLs to finally have a good family meal! More…

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Same thing different taste

By anon - 05/04/2017 04:00

Today, a guy grabbed my ass at the mall. I whirled around and went to sock him. He ducked and I accidentally hit the elderly woman standing behind him in the face. To say all hell broke loose would be an understatement. FML

I agree, your life sucks 5 705

You deserved it 758

Captain Badass

By NotAsToughAsHeThinks - 14/02/2011 03:25 - United States

Today, a man pulled me violently into an alleyway and informed me I was being mugged. Being a body-builder, I said, "Oh yeah? Go on then." He kicked my ass in a matter of seconds, stole my wallet, then farted on my bruised face. He called me a wimp. FML

I agree, your life sucks 16 162

You deserved it 54 043

By robbedonCTA - 22/09/2009 06:20 - United States

Today, I felt a tug on my backpack and found my wallet missing. A nice stranger pointed to a guy running down the stairs and said "There goes the guy who took your wallet!" I ran to catch the supposed offender. The 'nice' stranger was the actual offender distracting me as he got away. FML

I agree, your life sucks 41 111

You deserved it 7 707

By whathehell - 27/04/2013 08:28 - United Kingdom

Today, I was walking through a rough part of town, when a woman screamed that I'd stolen her bag. I was tackled to the ground by a large guy, who then gave my bag to her. FML

I agree, your life sucks 57 141

You deserved it 3 643

New variant incoming

By Death to all Covidiots. - 02/02/2022 16:59

Today, some dumbass ripped my facemask off, spit in my face, and ran away. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 225

You deserved it 204

By sorrystupid - 02/06/2015 07:42 - United States

Today, a man tried to mug me. I actually apologized to him for not having my wallet on me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 481

You deserved it 5 295

By Anonymous - 30/04/2012 21:46 - United States - Tampa

Today, I was walking home, when I saw a homeless man trying to tear the wallet out of another guy's hand. I can't stand bums, so I smacked him across the jaw. That's when the other one kneed me in the balls and made off with my wallet as well. FML

I agree, your life sucks 12 815

You deserved it 43 271

Stunlocked

By RoyBoy - 26/07/2021 18:01

Today, a stranger asked to borrow my phone since his had died. As he was using it, he kept walking away and I had to chase him because he was walking too far. He turned around, yelled, "Stop following me, asshole!" and punched me, knocking me out cold. When I came to, I realized the fucker stole my phone. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 010

You deserved it 614

By anonymous - 20/12/2010 11:23

Today, while I was walking home from work, it started to rain. Clutching my bag in one hand, I started to run so I wouldn't get too wet. I saw a man running towards me and all of a sudden he tackled me to the ground. He thought I had stolen someone's handbag. FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 114

You deserved it 3 268

Get back here!

By anythingjean - 25/05/2009 21:46 - Canada

Today, I saw a cute guy on the bus. I smiled at him and he smiled back. After a couple of stops, he got off the bus. He bumped into me, turned around, apologized, and winked. I stood there feeling good about myself. Then I realized he stole my wallet. FML

I agree, your life sucks 64 839

You deserved it 9 744

narkill 13

Wednesday 15 May 2013 18:51

Well. That's very...disturbing...

SpamPam 18

Wednesday 15 May 2013 18:52

I hope he had pants on

Comments

Xotoolyxo 16

Wednesday 15 May 2013 23:37

I bet that's some kind of disturbing fetish

Mike2293 5

Thursday 16 May 2013 0:39

if this would happen in front of me...you could wipe me off the floor id laugh so hard!

Mike2293 5

Thursday 16 May 2013 0:41

If i saw this. id die of laughing.

MichaelT17 9

Thursday 16 May 2013 1:14

Well..... I NOW gotta be careful picking up money

Ins0mau 20

Thursday 16 May 2013 1:21

Doesn't matter. Had sex.

NeoMatrix25 12

Thursday 16 May 2013 1:45

If i had a nickel for every time that's happened to me...I'd have a nickel. As I recall I found it one day and bent to pick it up....

NeoMatrix25 12

Thursday 16 May 2013 1:48

In this case, both head and tail were facing up

WelcomeToAndale 13

Thursday 16 May 2013 1:49

What a legend!

peacefaiiry 9

Thursday 16 May 2013 1:59

Lmao! Hilarious

jamnglamgirlie 17

Thursday 16 May 2013 2:19

I'm sorry that happened to you OP.

Keywords

Poopoo peepee Love Embarrassing Miscellaneous Christmas Romantic Break-ups Annoying Money Gross Ironic Argument Awkward Friends Cute Haircut Lonely Holidays Relatable Work Bosses Capitalism Cars You're fired Covid Health Jealousy Cheating Parenting Kids

The Top

Today, while my boyfriend and I were on a picnic date out in the country, things got a little heated. When we were switching positions, he screamed and started running around. Turns out neither of us noticed the beehive in the tree above us until his dick got stung. FML

I agree, your life sucks 4 297

You deserved it 1 134

Today, I got piss drunk. Being a tattoo artist, I came to the intoxicated conclusion that I could save much more money doing my own tattoos on myself. I now have my ex-boyfriend's name permanently on my thigh. It's not even spelled right. FML

I agree, your life sucks 10 536

You deserved it 65 008

The Top

Today, despite my pleading, my boyfriend mounted a set of bullhorns above our headboard. Guess what came crashing down on our heads at 2am. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 552

You deserved it 2 532

Today, my boyfriend was inside a cell phone store talking to a sales guy while I waited outside. I sent him a text, not realizing that the guy was using his phone to call customer service. A topless photo of me shows up on his phone when I text him. The sales guy looked. Twice. FML

I agree, your life sucks 11 553

You deserved it 58 962

Today, my mom stole the condoms out of my room and gave them to my little brother because I "won't be needing them anytime soon". FML

I agree, your life sucks 47 250

You deserved it 4 797

Today, my new roommate sent me a picture of our toothbrushes bristles touching with the caption "Look! I made them kiss!" FML

I agree, your life sucks 12 105

You deserved it 937

Today, while trying to have a serious conversation with my husband about his drug use over text, he came home. Drunk. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 867

You deserved it 8 880

Today, I had to take an emergency contraceptive. I was talking to my boyfriend about it, and I told him that my stomach really hurt. His response? "Aw. That's just the baby dying." FML

I agree, your life sucks 51 297

You deserved it 20 954