Love: Today, I sneezed. My boyfriend told me to shut up. FML

By SierraDiaz2097 - 23/03/2013 05:44 - United States - Vardaman

Today, I sneezed. My boyfriend told me to shut up. FML

I agree, your life sucks 40 624

You deserved it 9 663

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Same thing different taste

Tension

By Anonymous - 06/04/2011 11:47 - Netherlands

Today, my boyfriend's parents visited us. When everyone was chatting in the room, I needed to go to the bathroom. I got up and wanted to walk away when I sneezed, and farted at the same time. I thought they didn't hear it, until my boyfriend's brother said, "That wasn't just a sneeze was it?" FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 987

You deserved it 5 475

By HWS - 15/04/2011 05:47 - Canada

Today, I sneezed so hard I fell down the stairs. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 287

You deserved it 7 776

By Anonymous - 01/10/2011 11:44 - Sweden

Today, I sneezed so hard that I hit my head against the wall. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 206

You deserved it 6 112

By Anonymous - 04/10/2014 12:11 - United States - Brevard

Today, I tried kissing my boyfriend on the tip of his nose. He sneezed mid-kiss and headbutted me. Now, there's just an awkward silence. FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 684

You deserved it 4 726

By anonymous - 05/09/2014 16:17 - United Kingdom

Today, my boyfriend was about to sneeze. To avoid getting his new tablet wet, he chose to sneeze right into my face instead. FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 999

You deserved it 3 895

By SoSoRachel - 31/10/2012 21:03 - United States - Dunlap

Today, while giving a speech at work, I started sneezing. After what seemed to be the last sneeze, I went on talking. Apparently it wasn't, and I blew out my eardrum. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 380

You deserved it 1 892

By Anonymous - 08/07/2012 11:26 - Australia

Today, I witnessed my boyfriend sneeze in his hands, and then lick it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 114

You deserved it 3 500

Behave yourselves

By DogStew - 16/11/2023 08:00

Today, I got sneezed on by a fully grown man. FML

I agree, your life sucks 456

You deserved it 100

Bad timing, dude

By Anonymous - 24/02/2021 07:59 - Australia

Today, in the middle of asking my girlfriend to marry me, I sneezed so hard that I farted. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 018

You deserved it 150

By Anonymous - 19/09/2015 18:58 - United States - San Marcos

Today, I sneezed so hard that I re-dislocated my shoulder. FML

I agree, your life sucks 23 917

You deserved it 1 817

DocBastard 38

Saturday 23 March 2013 13:04

"Shut up" is one of those phrases that people who respect each other shouldn't say. My wife and I haven't said that in over 15 years. We prefer "**** you, asshole."

Bubbelz 25

Saturday 23 March 2013 12:24

Next time sneeze silently, in his face.

Comments

Crazynopantsman 11

Saturday 23 March 2013 12:36

Tell him to remember that when he asks for something.

DocBastard 38

Saturday 23 March 2013 13:04

"Shut up" is one of those phrases that people who respect each other shouldn't say. My wife and I haven't said that in over 15 years. We prefer "**** you, asshole."

SMHsohard 22

Saturday 23 March 2013 14:49

Doc, you sound like someone I could definitely learn to like!

IIFenix 3

Saturday 23 March 2013 15:13

Oh Doc I think I get it....it's one of those relationships where sex involves her yelling "bite me" and you yelling back "screw you"

Enslaved 36

Saturday 23 March 2013 16:06

49, Have you been watching Jeff Dunham/Walter's foreplay jokes?:P

limitedition 25

Saturday 23 March 2013 13:12

I'd take his advice. And not talk to him for a week.. Maybe he'd like that but still....

MakeTodayADTR 20

Saturday 23 March 2013 13:14

His time of the month? :P

QQmore_fml 18

Saturday 23 March 2013 13:14

Don't take it to seriously, I say that to my girlfriend as a joke sometimes. If he was serious get rid of him or talk it out like normal people.

IAMVINCE 11

Saturday 23 March 2013 13:20

Your life is totally ****** now.

Futacy 29

Saturday 23 March 2013 13:24

Unless he was performing a critical heart surgery for the dying president of Mongolia, and you were a patient from another room who was pacing around violently coughing, contaminating the air around you, saying, "shut up," is a stupid respone to a sneeze. Or if he was playing X-Box. Either one.