Animals: Today, I spent an hour and a half washing my car. As I was driving...

By andrea99 - 03/10/2010 09:35 - United States

Today, I spent an hour and a half washing my car. As I was driving down the highway, a large bird flew over my car and accidentally dropped the dead animal he was about to have for dinner. It landed on my windshield. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 663

You deserved it 3 416

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Same thing different taste

Clever

By FMLTIMESTWO - 10/06/2009 04:36 - United States

Today, I found a dead bird on my windshield. Thinking I was clever, I turned on my windshield wipers to get the bird off. Unfortunately, the dead bird fell through my open window and onto my lap. FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 557

You deserved it 61 972

By Wellthisishawkward - 14/08/2015 22:40 - United States

Today, as I was driving, a bird swooped down, right in front of my car. I didn't have enough time to react, and so I had to listen to my wife cry the rest of the way home. She kept talking about how it bounced off the windshield and how it probably had a family. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 742

You deserved it 2 902

By Username - 13/05/2011 08:13

Today, I was driving along when the car in front of me ran over an animal. I only realised this when a chunk of flesh and blood landed on my windscreen. I put my wipers on to get rid of it but instead it got stuck underneath the wipers and smeared all over the screen. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 857

You deserved it 6 735

By nothingisreal69 - 01/03/2011 22:21 - Reserved

Today, as I was driving home from work, a bird decided to commit suicide by flying in front of my car. The shock caused me to slam on the brakes, totaling three other cars in the process. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 309

You deserved it 13 363

By tristaph - 01/08/2018 00:00

Today, a bird took a dump on my truck as I was driving and the wind pushed it into the keyhole. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 376

You deserved it 183

By oops1234 - 16/04/2009 14:38 - United States

Today, I discovered that I had left my sunroof open all night during a storm and my front seats was soaked. I grabbed a towel for my seat but didn't close my sunroof because it was nice out. As I pull out of my driveway, I felt something wet hit my forehead. A bird shit on me through my sunroof. FML

I agree, your life sucks 62 513

You deserved it 17 453

By birdbath - 08/11/2009 07:26 - United States

Today, I ran into a bird. Not with my car, with my face. It was so scared, it crapped all over me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 895

You deserved it 3 639

By me. - 14/03/2012 15:19 - United States

Today, my husband thought it would be funny to drive my car through a flock of vultures eating road kill. Since a bird hit the mirror and broke it, I now have to pay for a replacement. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 159

You deserved it 3 858

By craphanded - 19/07/2011 17:45 - United Kingdom

Today, I saved a bird from being run over as it lay in the middle of the road. Thinking it had a broken wing or something, I started carrying it home, intending to take it to the vet later. It crapped in my hand and flew away. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 789

You deserved it 9 201

By birdmagnet - 25/04/2009 19:12 - United States

Today, I spent 90 dollars and two and a half hours getting my hair done at a fancy salon. As I was unlocking my car, a bird pooped in my hair. FML

I agree, your life sucks 57 180

You deserved it 12 625

crazedcabbages 0

Sunday 3 October 2010 19:15

im pretty sure ur life is not messed up

aaa125 0

Sunday 3 October 2010 19:14

just clean it up and get over it

Comments

flashback.miss 28

Sunday 3 October 2010 19:46

um... ew? lol

blahzz 4

Sunday 3 October 2010 19:53

Hey there you go. Dinner for tonight.

jocelyng_fml 0

Sunday 3 October 2010 20:04

I don't think it was an accident

dreamering 16

Sunday 3 October 2010 20:12

It was a sign from God?

ohSNAPyall 26

Monday 4 October 2010 7:42

Listen all of y'all, it's SABOTAGE!

illmatic2 16

Sunday 3 October 2010 20:10

Quit whining.

UnicornsDoExist 0

Sunday 3 October 2010 20:13

Selfish, much? Now what's the damn vulture going to eat, he'll starve, and you don't even care! Jeez, people today.

KineTicKonTact 0

Sunday 3 October 2010 20:15

Shouldnt be too messy if the animals been dead long enough :p

bkstyles 0

Sunday 3 October 2010 20:26

where do you live that vultures are that common? I wouldve fml'd once I seen one. lok

craphappened 4

Sunday 3 October 2010 20:37

How'd it taste?

Myreaper8 2

Sunday 3 October 2010 20:41

Nice run-on sentence.

bigbadtim 7

Sunday 3 October 2010 20:43

When you travel remember your carrion.

ohSNAPyall 26

Monday 4 October 2010 1:43

Even when you're just going to the drive-thru?

bigbadtim 7

Monday 4 October 2010 4:44

Road kill cafe?

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I agree, your life sucks 45 276

You deserved it 4 300

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You deserved it 3 737

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I agree, your life sucks 30 989

You deserved it 9 594

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I agree, your life sucks 69 714

You deserved it 8 615

Same thing different taste

Clever

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