Animals: Today, I spent an hour and a half washing my car. As I was driving...

By andrea99 - 03/10/2010 09:35 - United States

Today, I spent an hour and a half washing my car. As I was driving down the highway, a large bird flew over my car and accidentally dropped the dead animal he was about to have for dinner. It landed on my windshield. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 663

You deserved it 3 416

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Same thing different taste

Clever

By FMLTIMESTWO - 10/06/2009 04:36 - United States

Today, I found a dead bird on my windshield. Thinking I was clever, I turned on my windshield wipers to get the bird off. Unfortunately, the dead bird fell through my open window and onto my lap. FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 557

You deserved it 61 972

By Wellthisishawkward - 14/08/2015 22:40 - United States

Today, as I was driving, a bird swooped down, right in front of my car. I didn't have enough time to react, and so I had to listen to my wife cry the rest of the way home. She kept talking about how it bounced off the windshield and how it probably had a family. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 742

You deserved it 2 902

By Username - 13/05/2011 08:13

Today, I was driving along when the car in front of me ran over an animal. I only realised this when a chunk of flesh and blood landed on my windscreen. I put my wipers on to get rid of it but instead it got stuck underneath the wipers and smeared all over the screen. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 857

You deserved it 6 735

By nothingisreal69 - 01/03/2011 22:21 - Reserved

Today, as I was driving home from work, a bird decided to commit suicide by flying in front of my car. The shock caused me to slam on the brakes, totaling three other cars in the process. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 309

You deserved it 13 363

By tristaph - 01/08/2018 00:00

Today, a bird took a dump on my truck as I was driving and the wind pushed it into the keyhole. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 376

You deserved it 183

By oops1234 - 16/04/2009 14:38 - United States

Today, I discovered that I had left my sunroof open all night during a storm and my front seats was soaked. I grabbed a towel for my seat but didn't close my sunroof because it was nice out. As I pull out of my driveway, I felt something wet hit my forehead. A bird shit on me through my sunroof. FML

I agree, your life sucks 62 513

You deserved it 17 453

By birdbath - 08/11/2009 07:26 - United States

Today, I ran into a bird. Not with my car, with my face. It was so scared, it crapped all over me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 895

You deserved it 3 639

By me. - 14/03/2012 15:19 - United States

Today, my husband thought it would be funny to drive my car through a flock of vultures eating road kill. Since a bird hit the mirror and broke it, I now have to pay for a replacement. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 159

You deserved it 3 858

By craphanded - 19/07/2011 17:45 - United Kingdom

Today, I saved a bird from being run over as it lay in the middle of the road. Thinking it had a broken wing or something, I started carrying it home, intending to take it to the vet later. It crapped in my hand and flew away. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 789

You deserved it 9 201

By birdmagnet - 25/04/2009 19:12 - United States

Today, I spent 90 dollars and two and a half hours getting my hair done at a fancy salon. As I was unlocking my car, a bird pooped in my hair. FML

I agree, your life sucks 57 180

You deserved it 12 625

crazedcabbages 0

Sunday 3 October 2010 19:15

im pretty sure ur life is not messed up

aaa125 0

Sunday 3 October 2010 19:14

just clean it up and get over it

Comments

ZomgItzBenn 1

Monday 4 October 2010 2:33

Maybe the bird just wanted his dinner tenderized.

JakobKain 0

Monday 4 October 2010 2:33

someone from kentucky wouldnt complaon..

toyman911 0

Monday 4 October 2010 2:49

u don't deserve it trust me those jerks are just trying to be mean

andrea99_fml 0

Monday 4 October 2010 3:34

thanks.. ;)

Trollz4daLULZ 1

Monday 4 October 2010 19:44

Oh, yes you do. You wasted a ton of water to clean a pollution machine! Just think of all those poor fish that will drown in the air because of YOU. And as if that wasn't enough, you had to steal that poor bird's dinner. You monster.

justanotherbird 19

Monday 4 October 2010 3:14

F the hawks L! No more din din.

pin_up_666 0

Monday 4 October 2010 4:37

boo hop get over it

spaceshan69 0

Monday 4 October 2010 6:29

oook so how long does it take to clean a windshield? 20 seconds? yeah that's right so STFU. life unfucked, congrats you can thank me later.

vincent_vega_fml 0

Monday 4 October 2010 7:12

quit being a whiny bitch and clean it up! what's 3 minutes at the gas station using their squeegee compared to ur 90 minutes already spent. if you woulda spent the wasted time you spent posting this on cleaning your windshield, it'd already be done jackass!