Intimacy: Today, I tried to be cute by sitting on top of my boyfriend's...

By Anonymous - 30/12/2012 08:29 - United States - Inglewood

Today, I tried to be cute by sitting on top of my boyfriend's belly. While getting on top, I accidentally kneed him in his nuts. In pain, he jolted his head up and ended up banging his head against mine. Now I have a black eye and he can't walk without waddling. FML

I agree, your life sucks 23 917

You deserved it 44 405

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Same thing different taste

Kinky

By LaLa - 09/01/2012 05:01 - United States

Today, I was with my boyfriend, and we started to get a little kinky. He laid me down roughly on the bed, but I started to slide off, so I pulled myself up. In doing so, I managed to knee him in the nut-sack, causing him to puke. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 785

You deserved it 7 879

By dinosaur - 10/01/2011 10:35 - Australia

Today, my boyfriend decided it would be fun to sit on my lap. In the process he landed on me so hard that he made me hit my head. Then when he turned around his elbow smacked into my nose causing it to break. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 221

You deserved it 3 210

By Anonymous - 16/03/2012 20:23 - Ireland

Today, my boyfriend and I were getting heated, and he started to go down on me. In excitement, I accidentally drove a knee into his face. No amount of fondling his diddlestick made him forgive me for his bloody nose and swollen eye. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 771

You deserved it 13 693

By staciedee - 01/06/2010 09:49 - United States

Today, my boyfriend thought it would be cute to try and pick me up while kissing, instead he tripped and slammed the back of my head on the corner of the wall. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 173

You deserved it 4 955

The heat of the moment

By righthook - 08/04/2015 19:56 - United States

Today, I was having sex with my boyfriend. He was about to make me come so I lifted my arm above my head with pleasure. I accidently punched him in the eye, hard enough that he had to stop for a while because he said he felt dizzy. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 889

You deserved it 8 654

By caligirl921 - 11/12/2010 06:00 - United States

Today, my boyfriend was going down on me. When I orgasmed, my leg flew out and I accidentally kicked him in the balls. For the next ten minutes, he lay in the fetal position. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 092

You deserved it 21 132

Kinky

By Anonymous - 23/08/2022 12:00 - United States - Fpo

Today, my boyfriend and I got into a fight. Once we were cool, we decided to have makeup sex. I tried to change position so we could 69, but I then accidently kicked him in the head. He thinks I did it on purpose. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 051

You deserved it 276

By Anonymous - 04/01/2016 06:59 - United States - Atwater

Today, my husband and I were getting frisky. All was going well until I decided to go down on him, causing him to freak out, thinking I was going for his butt, ending the night with a black eye from being knee'd in the face. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 607

You deserved it 2 704

It's just a flesh wound!

By manhandled - 01/02/2012 18:05 - Canada

Today, my boyfriend and I were getting intimate. He picked me up and threw me over his shoulder to take me to his room. He wasn't careful enough, and dropped me right on my head, on the hardwood floor. I ended up vomiting and came down with a headache. He still wanted to have sex. FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 165

You deserved it 4 026

By Anonymous - 08/05/2015 16:46 - United Kingdom - Loughton

Today, while making out with my boyfriend, I sneezed so hard that my head shot forward and smashed against his, sending his head backwards against the wall. He ended up with a concussion, and I still feel like someone hit me over the head with a chair. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 823

You deserved it 3 844

poccocurantes 7

Sunday 30 December 2012 19:06

Banging your boyfriend till he walks funny. Somehow I don't think that's what he had in mind.

Bliss391 7

Sunday 30 December 2012 19:08

I'm sorry, but I just don't understand how sitting on his belly would be cute. It really just sounds uncomfortable.

Comments

mgrabi01 10

Sunday 30 December 2012 20:25

You are both perfect for each other!!!

Jsm3 5

Sunday 30 December 2012 20:27

That's what you get for trying! Don't TRY, just BE!

BlackPhenom 9

Sunday 30 December 2012 21:02

This sounds like something Elliot from Scrubs would do.

shabbydoooo 8

Sunday 30 December 2012 21:24

Haha that Kodak moment lol

outoftown 26

Sunday 30 December 2012 21:32

Brusied balls, black eye.... Seriously, you're not coordinated enough for this kind of cute.

Caruci 7

Sunday 30 December 2012 21:53

Lol, what else can go wrong

micah9794 4

Sunday 30 December 2012 22:02

Hind sights 20/20

rivaraven 35

Sunday 30 December 2012 22:22

That's... cute.

Fman92 9

Sunday 30 December 2012 22:22

next time sit on his crotch

OhhKristin 11

Sunday 30 December 2012 22:23

how is sitting on someone's belly cute?

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The Top

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You deserved it 8 644

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You deserved it 3 693

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You deserved it 260

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I agree, your life sucks 13 419

You deserved it 2 080

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I agree, your life sucks 55 114

You deserved it 13 841

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I agree, your life sucks 1 094

You deserved it 110

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I agree, your life sucks 2 486

You deserved it 690

Today, after weeks of dealing with a bad hair cut, my hair finally grew back to my preferred length. Today is also the day my roommate replaced my shampoo with hair remover as a prank. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 518

You deserved it 1 861

Same thing different taste

Kinky

The heat of the moment

Kinky

It's just a flesh wound!

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