Work: Today, I was bored at my job at Home Depot. I got a bar code...

By tool - 09/04/2009 06:03 - United States

Today, I was bored at my job at Home Depot. I got a bar code tattoo 3 weeks ago and thought it would be funny to scan it. I'm a $5.98 160z claw hammer. FML

I agree, your life sucks 43 908

You deserved it 143 195

Cyber Monday: Clicks and Quiproquos
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Same thing different taste

By Anonymous - 07/01/2013 21:27 - United States - Foxboro

Today, my son volunteered to help me cut out coupons. When I got to the register at the store, I noticed he'd cut off all the barcodes. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 179

You deserved it 7 963

By Anonymous - 29/10/2009 05:15 - Australia

Today, I got a free temporary tattoo of a scorpion in a packet of potato chips and decided to wear it on my wrist. Whilst I was in the shower, I got a shock, thinking it was a spider. I then lost balance and slipped, banging my head on the faucet. FML

I agree, your life sucks 12 309

You deserved it 43 582

By scaredinnyc - 14/11/2012 01:03 - United States - Trenton

Today, I was looking at tattoos and fell in love with a really cool looking one, so I decided to get it. I later showed it to a friend who is a cop. He informed me that it is a gang tattoo. I think I just put a target on my ankle. FML

I agree, your life sucks 8 997

You deserved it 31 401

Great idea

By aridaley - 21/05/2011 23:33 - United States

Today, I got piss drunk. Being a tattoo artist, I came to the intoxicated conclusion that I could save much more money doing my own tattoos on myself. I now have my ex-boyfriend's name permanently on my thigh. It's not even spelled right. FML

I agree, your life sucks 10 535

You deserved it 65 005

By lk mm, n vwls - 11/01/2014 01:20 - United States - Mansfield Depot

Today, my boss hung a dartboard in his office. It has a printout of my employee photo taped to it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 42 464

You deserved it 4 814

By nukebroadcast - 16/12/2010 06:32 - United States

Today, I found out what sound a hammer makes when it strikes the back of my hand. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 317

You deserved it 6 014

By bananamuffin - 30/03/2012 19:13 - United States

Today, I realized that the "holla" tattoo I stupidly got on my lower lip five years ago isn't fading as I expected it to, and will probably contribute to my unemployment for years to come. FML

I agree, your life sucks 7 010

You deserved it 74 026

By MissSmarts - 14/12/2009 01:27 - United States

Today, I went to the grocery store where this really cute guy works. I swiped my card but the machine wouldn't read it. I swiped it quickly some more before getting frustrated and saying, "Your stupid machine doesn't work!" He took the card and turned it around. His face said it all. FML

I agree, your life sucks 6 977

You deserved it 39 668

By Username - 02/08/2011 14:52 - United States

Today, I got my eyebrow pierced. By a fish hook. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 504

You deserved it 5 111

Sole music

By Anonymous - 16/12/2010 20:59 - United States

Today, a thumb tack came out of one of my posters on my wall. The sole of my foot had the pleasure of finding it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 388

You deserved it 3 980

scott1494 0

Thursday 9 April 2009 16:05

haaaaaaaahahahahahahahahahahahaaaa!!!! Talk about being a tool!!!!!

Tucatz 0

Thursday 9 April 2009 16:07

Could be worse- at the grocery store you might be a $0.69 can of green beans. And at the drugstore you could be Preparation H. In fact, that should be your new goal- to go around and find out what you are at various stores.

Comments

tipple 0

Friday 10 April 2009 6:20

... So instead of MC Hammer - you're the cheap-ass HD Hammer? ROFL! And #224 is sooo right - you should always check in the bible before getting a tattoo! Book of Tathew 3:13 And the Lord God spake unto him saying "Do not get a cheap-ass tatt. If I see any of y'all with some $6.66 tatt, I'm gonna send a hairy-ass demon down to have a chat wid you, then I'm gonna zap yo ass with a lightning bolt! Y'hear me y'all?!?"

LYFSUKSTHENUDIE 0

Friday 10 April 2009 6:27

hahahaha thats awesome! i know a couple of people with bar code tattoos im going to make them scan themselves and see what comes up LOL

b00mc1ap 0

Friday 10 April 2009 6:33

LOL at #226 nice man! and at #227, you can't scan yourself. This is fake. You need a metallic, magnetized tattoo to be able to scan it...and I seriously doubt he has that...

zombiepeanut 0

Friday 10 April 2009 6:52

Yeah, this isn't possible and it isn't even an FML.

kellster 2

Friday 10 April 2009 6:59

I lol-ed!

fueledbyamy 0

Friday 10 April 2009 7:22

this is funny. but i dunno if i reckon it's true. cos i work at toys r us, in australia, and you cant scan things that arent in the system. like, my water bottle doesnt scan, cos we dont sell that brand. and one of the girls is really good at art, and made an exact copy of a barcode of one of the items, and it didnt work.