Intimacy: Today, I was getting dirty with my boyfriend. It was the first...

By Anonymous - 19/06/2012 03:33 - United States

Today, I was getting dirty with my boyfriend. It was the first time he had fingered anyone, and the only thing he said was, "It feels like the inside of my asshole." FML

I agree, your life sucks 49 423

You deserved it 4 625

Christmas: Snowy Joys and Blunders
Enjoy Christmas stories where unexpected gifts and family reunions create lasting memories... and fun! More…

Previous FML Next FML

Same thing different taste

By InvAzn - 14/12/2017 06:00

Today, my boyfriend and I were getting intimate with each other, starting with some foreplay. Before he fingered me, he put on a blue surgical glove, claiming that "down there is dirty and smelly" and he didn't want it on his hand. FML

I agree, your life sucks 7 591

You deserved it 2 368

What what?

By Anonymous - 12/04/2022 16:00

Today, my boyfriend stuck his finger in my butt and I liked it, but I can’t ever tell him that or he’ll get that smug look on his face like, “I told you so, let’s have anal now.” FML

I agree, your life sucks 502

You deserved it 1 457

Marvel Comics

By Anonymous - 14/07/2011 16:52 - United States

Today, my boyfriend fingered me. He never cuts his nails. It felt like I was getting intimate with Wolverine. FML

I agree, your life sucks 54 825

You deserved it 15 918

By C0r1nn3 - 07/06/2012 04:02 - United States - Santa Clara

Today, I was cuddling with my boyfriend in bed after a round of amazing sex. He decided it would be a great time to stick his finger up my nose. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 842

You deserved it 5 088

By Anonymous - 30/09/2012 23:02 - United States - Rocky Point

Today, I was having sex with my boyfriend doggy-style. I was getting close when he suddenly blurts out, "Babe, you really need to bleach your asshole." FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 966

You deserved it 5 657

Close but no BJ

By nikkrissa_04 - 07/08/2009 11:17 - United States

Today, my boyfriend and I were messing around in his car. I then decided I was going to give him a blowjob for the first time. As I was going down, he grabbed my chin and said, "Don't do that, your mouth isn't clean enough." FML

I agree, your life sucks 59 675

You deserved it 12 201

By Anon. - 01/03/2011 23:51 - United States

Today, my girlfriend thought it would be sexy to stick her finger up my ass during sex. I screamed like a little girl and barely managed to finish. Afterward, she said, 'Now you know how it feels.' FML

I agree, your life sucks 20 614

You deserved it 91 023

By Anonymous - 19/01/2016 11:03 - United Kingdom - London

Today, I was having sex with my boyfriend. It was all going great until he decided to try talking dirty. His idea of this was moaning loudly, "Just what the pussy ordered" as he entered me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 23 308

You deserved it 2 763

Turn off

By Anonymous - 03/11/2012 18:02 - Australia - Wembley

Today, my boyfriend and I got intimate with each other for the first time. He shoved his hand down my pants, touched about an inch away from my clitoris, and whispered, "Cummm" in my ear. I doubt I'll have an orgasm ever again. FML

I agree, your life sucks 41 039

You deserved it 4 252

By Anonymous - 19/04/2010 20:36 - United States

Today, my boyfriend told me he loved me for the first time. He followed it with, "Want to try anal?" FML

I agree, your life sucks 41 679

You deserved it 9 736

alexphyllis 5

Tuesday 19 June 2012 8:51

Better make sure he washes his hands first from now on, especially if they're up his ass.

SerendipityRose 26

Tuesday 19 June 2012 9:32

If you guys go as far as having sex, when he enters, you should say, "Huh, feels like my pinky finger."

Comments

jwbfml 11

Tuesday 19 June 2012 17:14

At least he didn't reference it feeling like one of his friend's asshole.

_wraith 15

Tuesday 19 June 2012 17:26

Well, first I thought that this man right here might be into some very kinky things, especially if he's fingered his own ass before. Than I re-read the "first time fingering anyone" part and I had to wonder how old you guys are? Either way, it sucks that he compared those two parts of the anatomy... "The inside of your ****** feels like the inside of my asshole!" You got a charmer there, OP xD

GothInside 6

Tuesday 19 June 2012 17:51

O_o

TdReX 5

Tuesday 19 June 2012 17:52

Come on guys everyone's a little curious just to know what it feels like

cowboys357 4

Tuesday 19 June 2012 18:12

That's special.

dsl1123 8

Tuesday 19 June 2012 18:14

That I'd a very disturbing response.

Kasse 4

Tuesday 19 June 2012 18:22

0.o Maybe he knows what the inside of his butt feels like because he lost something in there? Or self prostate examinations? You know, health conscious and all. You've picked a winner!