Miscellaneous: Today, I was holding my baby daughter during a checkup. To reassure...

By smoochie - 01/08/2009 21:37

Today, I was holding my baby daughter during a checkup. To reassure her, I was kissing the back of her head while the Dr. was checking her hearing. After a few minutes, I realized the Dr. had put his hand to steady her head. I was kissing his hand. FML

I agree, your life sucks 42 046

You deserved it 23 360

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Same thing different taste

By Anonymous - 19/11/2010 07:47

Today, I was putting my 2 year old to bed, and I began to sing to her. She reached up, put her finger over my lips, and said, "Shhh, Mommy." FML

I agree, your life sucks 42 358

You deserved it 13 762

Sorry sweetie

By ddhaley1 - This FML is from back in 2015 but it's good stuff - United States - Edmond

Today, instead of kissing my child's boo-boo on her finger to make it feel better, I accidentally headbutted her. FML

I agree, your life sucks 24 804

You deserved it 3 321

Classic mistake

By Katy - 14/02/2023 18:00

Today, after I finished giving my baby a bottle then burping her, I lifted her up and was bringing her in for kisses. As I was doing this, I felt this warm liquid hit my lips and slide into my mouth. I instantly pulled her back and she'd vomited. It took everything out of me not to vomit myself. FML

I agree, your life sucks 743

You deserved it 368

By johnny121 - 01/01/2010 19:14 - France

Today, I had to go to the hospital. While I was there, my mom started hitting on a doctor. Later I saw them making out in the room next to me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 047

You deserved it 2 662

By thisreallyhappened - 15/05/2009 02:39 - United States

Today, a little girl at my work had an accident. She asked me to help her change, and as she was changing she stuck her hand in her vagina to make sure all the "peepee was gone". She then put that same hand on my face to balance herself as she finished changing. FML

I agree, your life sucks 63 787

You deserved it 3 981

By icanthearyou - 04/04/2013 23:55 - United States - Rock Island

Today, I was working at a daycare. There was a 6-year-old boy pretending to be my doctor, holding a little, plastic thermometer. He then, without warning, quickly shoved it deep into my ear. The last thing I heard was his giggle. I think I'm deaf. FML

I agree, your life sucks 45 085

You deserved it 4 012

By WTFFAIL - 03/12/2012 05:06 - Canada - Montreal

Today, while getting a hernia exam, I accidentally ran my fingers through my doctor's hair. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 576

You deserved it 9 005

By Anonymous - 23/01/2011 07:21 - United States

Today, I went to the hospital to visit my aunt and her newborn baby. The receptionist gave me the room number, and I went and my aunt was in the bathroom so I cuddle the baby, only to find that the woman who came out of the bathroom was a complete stranger. I was holding her baby. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 627

You deserved it 8 389

By sad child - 27/08/2011 07:45 - United States

Today, I went to my doctor for a check-up. It started with the doctor lifting my shirt up to check my heartbeat, and ended with my gran starting a fistfight over his "perverted ways." FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 759

You deserved it 2 704

By Anonymous - 01/11/2010 17:30 - United States

Today, I drove to the hospital to see my newborn. I went to the room, picked him out of the crate and held him. Then I heard the toilet flush and saw a woman who I didn't know come out. She screamed. My wife was in the room next door. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 496

You deserved it 10 377

meanie_monday 0

Saturday 1 August 2009 23:39

Wouldn't you feel the roughness of his hand or something?

divineinstrument 2

Saturday 1 August 2009 23:45

I love how accidentally kissing a guy's hand makes you gay, even if you're not attracted to other men Besides the OP could be a woman for all we know. Why have we assumed he's a man?

Comments

darkmis1 17

Sunday 2 August 2009 2:01

wuts really disturbing is that the doctor didnt tell you to stop

kellster 2

Sunday 2 August 2009 2:01

I lol-ed. That sounds like something I would do!

misty_donna 0

Sunday 2 August 2009 2:15

why would they deserve more for being a female?

slinkiess 0

Sunday 2 August 2009 2:19

this is kind of a crappy FML. come on, mods! this is an embarrassing situation, not "****-my-life" material. people do this all the time.

anniebananie 3

Sunday 2 August 2009 5:36

If you haven't noticed, FML is for funny, embarrassing situations, not depressing stories. Nobody wants to read "Today, I found out I have cancer. FML." In most FMLs, the OP's life is not actually ******.