Intimacy: Today, I was lying in bed with my boyfriend, telling him how...

By fml - 12/08/2011 06:14 - Canada

Today, I was lying in bed with my boyfriend, telling him how much I loved him. His answer? "Less lovin' more humpin'." This happens every single time. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 854

You deserved it 30 571

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Same thing different taste

Humping

By needanotherbed - 28/05/2014 14:21 - United Kingdom - Ipswich

Today, I climbed into bed with my sleeping boyfriend after a long shift at work. He immediately rolled over, clamped my leg between his knees, and started viciously humping it. This is the fourth time now, and he still doesn't believe that he even does it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 52 413

You deserved it 6 196

By dummy - 17/02/2012 00:03 - United States

Today, my boyfriend and I were getting frisky in bed. He mumbled something that sounded like "I love you." I replied "I love you too baby", to which he laughed then said, "I said I wanted you to blow me." FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 731

You deserved it 5 665

Exercise One

By blah - 02/06/2020 23:00

Today, while cuddling with my boyfriend, he started humping my leg and said, "I'm gonna hump the fatness out of you and make you beautiful." FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 310

You deserved it 435

Not helping

By Anonymous - 19/06/2022 06:00 - Spain

Today, i told my boyfriend that I wasn't feeling emotionally well, and wanted cuddles. He proceeded to hump my leg. FML

I agree, your life sucks 915

You deserved it 1 302

By Anonymous - 14/03/2011 19:16 - United States

Today, I told my boyfriend that I love him. He responded by asking for a blowjob. FML

I agree, your life sucks 49 959

You deserved it 14 587

A little higher, dude

By Anonymous - 04/04/2022 14:00

Today, I was laying in bed with my boyfriend. He started caressing me, his eyes were closed, and he said, “I love touching your boobs.” Which was actually a roll of fat on my stomach. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 075

You deserved it 522

By jonnah - 05/03/2010 13:06 - Canada

Today, I told my boyfriend I loved him. His response? "Is that why you have been so clingy and annoying lately?" FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 682

You deserved it 5 293

By Anonymous - 19/06/2014 14:33 - United States - San Francisco

Today, I was feeling unappreciated and asked my boyfriend if he loves me. He faltered and replied, "Uh, my dick does." FML

I agree, your life sucks 51 674

You deserved it 8 434

By Anonymous - 01/04/2011 04:32 - United States

Today, my boyfriend and I were lying in bed together, and I was in a snuggly mood. I rolled over to gaze lovingly into his eyes and whisper sweet nothings to him in the darkness. His response? "Dear God! Did somebody fart in your mouth?!" FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 731

You deserved it 36 357

By yoked - 18/12/2009 03:48 - United States

Today, while lying in bed with my wife, I asked her if she still loved me. Her reply "Sometimes". This I know is true because she instantly rolled over and farted on my leg. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 192

You deserved it 4 640

silly_kitten 9

Friday 12 August 2011 16:14

That's when you say "Less humpin' more dumpin'."

zebraface 15

Friday 12 August 2011 16:08

Ditch his ass

Comments

teenagedream13 1

Friday 12 August 2011 16:51

ooo. that sucks.

LissaMccracken 23

Tuesday 2 July 2013 0:53

Then click "I agree, your life sucks"... That's a pointless comment.

fredforever_fml 0

Friday 12 August 2011 16:54

And that is when you dump his sorry ass

big_boi_rollin 0

Friday 12 August 2011 17:04

Thats when you say " You know...im only in this relationship for the sex too"

tecktonik123 0

Friday 12 August 2011 23:23

that's stupid then why would she express her feelings rather than get it on ? FAIL -_-

Cinn_fml 22

Friday 12 August 2011 17:10

Either take the hint, or try talking to him about what you both want from the relationship and/or check that he's not just kidding around thinking he's been cute with that response.

fliplover 8

Friday 12 August 2011 17:13

If you didn't leave his loser ass after he said that to you the second time, you are a doormat with no self esteem who deserves the crappy treatment he is giving you! No sympathy here...

sourgirl101 28

Friday 12 August 2011 17:15

*SINGS* More than words is all you have to do to make it real Then you wouldn't have to say that you love me 'Cause I'd already know

russianspy1234 11

Friday 12 August 2011 17:17

And the fact that you keep humping AND keep saying you love him is only serving to reinforce this behavior, both with you and with the next girl he dates.

Panther1983 0

Friday 12 August 2011 17:17

Less lovin, more humping. And while your at it make him a damn sammich female

krez 20

Friday 12 August 2011 17:19

It is amazing how many women fall in love with an imaginary version of their boyfriend. They seem to confuse "cool and confident" with "a-hole that uses you".